morass
I really need to pull my life together. It hasn't exactly fallen apart, but I seem to have spread myself thin, if that makes any sense. No, I can do better than that. It's like all the chunks and pieces of my life have broken apart, a shattered mirror, but are still being held together by long, fluid strands of pink, sticky bubble gum.
I've been hanging out with this group of people lately who are very entertaining, but brutally honest. I felt I had to be more honest than anyone else when I was with them, but this actually felt good. I am torn.
I love pretty much everyone I know so much and would do anything or sacrifice anything for any one of my friends in an instant. That's one of the only really true things I can say about myself.
I am an actor. It makes me sick. If I am going to be uncomfortable around a group of people, I should just accept it and move on. Instead, I learn how to act like that group (usually within a couple of days), and eventually become a part of it. There, I change and become a different person, if only temporarily. The AA groups truly have it right when they say "fake it until you make it." All you have to do is accept it and it becomes a part of you.
Moving back to my recent situation, certain events in the past three weeks have promoted unparalleled initiative in my life--more than I have ever felt before. Will people give me the chance? I am motivated, and it feels good.
but, I don't feel good.
I've been hanging out with this group of people lately who are very entertaining, but brutally honest. I felt I had to be more honest than anyone else when I was with them, but this actually felt good. I am torn.
I love pretty much everyone I know so much and would do anything or sacrifice anything for any one of my friends in an instant. That's one of the only really true things I can say about myself.
I am an actor. It makes me sick. If I am going to be uncomfortable around a group of people, I should just accept it and move on. Instead, I learn how to act like that group (usually within a couple of days), and eventually become a part of it. There, I change and become a different person, if only temporarily. The AA groups truly have it right when they say "fake it until you make it." All you have to do is accept it and it becomes a part of you.
Moving back to my recent situation, certain events in the past three weeks have promoted unparalleled initiative in my life--more than I have ever felt before. Will people give me the chance? I am motivated, and it feels good.
but, I don't feel good.