Another Year.. Thanks Mom and Dad!
I am 36! Thirty Five was a rough year... Laid Off @ 34...lost 2 more jobs at 35...started a business, it failed. Started drawing comics! But now, drawing is a luxury when my arms dont ache (As is updating my journal and typing... Been putting this post together for a few days, and I keep adding to it)...
Thirty Six is looking up though. This last week, mostly my legs and back are the only aches that I had to endure.. My arms are much better. And the gifts I got this year touched me in odd ways... Especially when I asked for no gifts!
I realized, that this life is the memories we collect from day-to-day and person-to-person. I am ready to leave the pain and anguish of this world behind and not be tied to it as closely. But instead, be tied to people and moments. Yet everyone keeps buying me trinkets...STUFF!!! And I used to like STUFF!!!
I used to long for a New action figure for my collection, and new DVD boxed-sets... A new video game, etc.. Well, some of these gifts still are great, but for entirely different reasons. Before, I just had the NEED to HAVE EVERYTHING... Now, I want to share or experience unique things... Not just POSSESS THEM! I have sold 65 % of my toy collection, all but 2 of my CD's and DVD's (I had thousands of each...not a lie!). I feel FREE!!!!!!! Or at least, a step closer. Instead, I wante to see, read or hear things and recal them. No POSSESS THEM. I have found OWNING something is not as enjoyable as the memory of something I once EXPERIENCED.
My parents sent me money... I usually think this is a thoughtless gift. But my folks always buy me unique items that are so distinctly "ME". But they knew how rough we had it financially. And as my mom put it when I tried to turn the money down: "I planned for this for quite some time and worked it into my budget. ". Which for my mom means the world. If it fits the budget, it is written in stone!!! But they also got me a Justice League Birthday Card... Soley because they know that my son and I always watch Justice League together...its a bonding moment oddly. Its great to know that at my age, my folks dont buy me sappy grab-and-go Hallmark-Moment cards!!!
From my wife and son I received: The new Kate Bush CD (Which is awesome romantic sex on a flat disk!!!), a stack of blank CD's, the 12th Book in a Series of Unfortunate Events and a LARGE bottle of Natural Calcium Supplements.
Kimmie Jean had heard me complain endlessly about how I have been longing for the new Kate's CD (that has been in the works for years now). And how it hurt me to sell the Kate Bush THE WHOLE STORY CD when I needed to get grocery money. I hadnt even heard the new CD was OUT...yet KJ did!!!! She rocks!!!! Plus, many of my CD's before being sold were copied over to my PC. So, now I have blank CD's to burn them back onto (as well as copy artwork onto CD finally, and get Johnnie Zombie #8 to Midgard!!!!). And I LOVE TO READ, but couldnt afford the new Harry Potter Book.. But I can at least read the cheaper and funnier new Lemony Snicket Book now (Kimmie also arranged a date with one of our friends to see the new Harry Potter next Friday... She is buying my ticket for me too!!!!). And, being a vegetarian and careful about what animal foods I eat, KJ found me non-animal based Calcium Supplements to help with my bone and tissue disorder.
Long winded...sorry...had to share.
On a side note (please do not be Offended Babs and CJ): I was a visitor/guest at a charity auction run by a local "Star Trek Club" the U.S.S. Maximillian... We call these groups simply "ships" nowadays. Yes, some few folks came in costume/logo jackets. And this was also an ELECTION MEETING... So I got to hear speaches from those running for office (1st Officer and Security/Record Keeper I believe). The two folks I actually know in this "Ship" both were running for office. I am sorry, I tried not to chuckle... I remember when I was so into all this, and now I feel as a non-geek in a all geek environment. Yet, I still know all the episodes, shows, movies, toys etc... I am just a closet geek any more (well, not so in-the-closet, just more of a hobbiest with a dying passion). But parts of the evening were surreal, humorous, yet endlessly adorable. I loved seeing the passion, and the devotion some of these folks have to their persona on the "ship". Its a Lifestyle, yet a fun comedy/tragedy to observe... And the former me wanted so to join this club... To belong!
I no longer need to belong or fit in anywhere... I am ME wherever I go. I dont hide it. My geek knowledge, my personal faith, my love for my little family... Its all stuff out in the open. I am me... I dont mind drifting in and out with ANYONE or with any group... But I no longer need to belong with them to feel whole. But, if its for a charity or helps someone somehow... I will do what I can with what little I have. I can be amongst, rather than belong to help folks out! They earned over $500.00 for charity!!! And I donated a small part of the auction items (and also pushed my friends' Comics Stores as co-donators...they are good people, and run a smart business with values intact!!!). It was a fun night...wish I could have stayed a while longer, but it was grocery night and my KJ and Ian were hungry. Had to run to get dinner fixin's.
Thirty Six is looking to be a fine year! Gotta go take my supplements and get some rest gang.
God Bless... And thanks for sharing this world with me.
Thirty Six is looking up though. This last week, mostly my legs and back are the only aches that I had to endure.. My arms are much better. And the gifts I got this year touched me in odd ways... Especially when I asked for no gifts!
I realized, that this life is the memories we collect from day-to-day and person-to-person. I am ready to leave the pain and anguish of this world behind and not be tied to it as closely. But instead, be tied to people and moments. Yet everyone keeps buying me trinkets...STUFF!!! And I used to like STUFF!!!
I used to long for a New action figure for my collection, and new DVD boxed-sets... A new video game, etc.. Well, some of these gifts still are great, but for entirely different reasons. Before, I just had the NEED to HAVE EVERYTHING... Now, I want to share or experience unique things... Not just POSSESS THEM! I have sold 65 % of my toy collection, all but 2 of my CD's and DVD's (I had thousands of each...not a lie!). I feel FREE!!!!!!! Or at least, a step closer. Instead, I wante to see, read or hear things and recal them. No POSSESS THEM. I have found OWNING something is not as enjoyable as the memory of something I once EXPERIENCED.
My parents sent me money... I usually think this is a thoughtless gift. But my folks always buy me unique items that are so distinctly "ME". But they knew how rough we had it financially. And as my mom put it when I tried to turn the money down: "I planned for this for quite some time and worked it into my budget. ". Which for my mom means the world. If it fits the budget, it is written in stone!!! But they also got me a Justice League Birthday Card... Soley because they know that my son and I always watch Justice League together...its a bonding moment oddly. Its great to know that at my age, my folks dont buy me sappy grab-and-go Hallmark-Moment cards!!!
From my wife and son I received: The new Kate Bush CD (Which is awesome romantic sex on a flat disk!!!), a stack of blank CD's, the 12th Book in a Series of Unfortunate Events and a LARGE bottle of Natural Calcium Supplements.
Kimmie Jean had heard me complain endlessly about how I have been longing for the new Kate's CD (that has been in the works for years now). And how it hurt me to sell the Kate Bush THE WHOLE STORY CD when I needed to get grocery money. I hadnt even heard the new CD was OUT...yet KJ did!!!! She rocks!!!! Plus, many of my CD's before being sold were copied over to my PC. So, now I have blank CD's to burn them back onto (as well as copy artwork onto CD finally, and get Johnnie Zombie #8 to Midgard!!!!). And I LOVE TO READ, but couldnt afford the new Harry Potter Book.. But I can at least read the cheaper and funnier new Lemony Snicket Book now (Kimmie also arranged a date with one of our friends to see the new Harry Potter next Friday... She is buying my ticket for me too!!!!). And, being a vegetarian and careful about what animal foods I eat, KJ found me non-animal based Calcium Supplements to help with my bone and tissue disorder.
Long winded...sorry...had to share.
On a side note (please do not be Offended Babs and CJ): I was a visitor/guest at a charity auction run by a local "Star Trek Club" the U.S.S. Maximillian... We call these groups simply "ships" nowadays. Yes, some few folks came in costume/logo jackets. And this was also an ELECTION MEETING... So I got to hear speaches from those running for office (1st Officer and Security/Record Keeper I believe). The two folks I actually know in this "Ship" both were running for office. I am sorry, I tried not to chuckle... I remember when I was so into all this, and now I feel as a non-geek in a all geek environment. Yet, I still know all the episodes, shows, movies, toys etc... I am just a closet geek any more (well, not so in-the-closet, just more of a hobbiest with a dying passion). But parts of the evening were surreal, humorous, yet endlessly adorable. I loved seeing the passion, and the devotion some of these folks have to their persona on the "ship". Its a Lifestyle, yet a fun comedy/tragedy to observe... And the former me wanted so to join this club... To belong!
I no longer need to belong or fit in anywhere... I am ME wherever I go. I dont hide it. My geek knowledge, my personal faith, my love for my little family... Its all stuff out in the open. I am me... I dont mind drifting in and out with ANYONE or with any group... But I no longer need to belong with them to feel whole. But, if its for a charity or helps someone somehow... I will do what I can with what little I have. I can be amongst, rather than belong to help folks out! They earned over $500.00 for charity!!! And I donated a small part of the auction items (and also pushed my friends' Comics Stores as co-donators...they are good people, and run a smart business with values intact!!!). It was a fun night...wish I could have stayed a while longer, but it was grocery night and my KJ and Ian were hungry. Had to run to get dinner fixin's.
Thirty Six is looking to be a fine year! Gotta go take my supplements and get some rest gang.
God Bless... And thanks for sharing this world with me.