(no subject)
today was an amazing fucking day...
Carissa, you were absolutly amazing, every kiss was so perfect and I loved every minute I spent with you, I will never forget today and everything that happened, it was truly awesome, thank you so much. You are an amazing person and I hope I see you again soon, very soon, Im planning on coming back next weekend, I miss you already, I'll talk to you soon.... check ur email ;) miss you.
w00t
what a fuckin day.
lastnigth I stayed up all night talking on the phone to an awesome friend of mine. we talked abuot whats happening with all the bullshit drama and she convinced me to break up with Devinne. So I did. Seriously, I've decided to listen to everything that this friend says because she is seriously ALWAYS right about everything, for the past two years of our friendship, hate and love shes been right through it all..... I love that about her, love it all. lol. sooooooo, I text messaged Devinne while I was on the phone with her and ended it all, because she was right. Devinne only drags me down, she has no respect, and no real expirience and a lot to learn. so that ended nicely... but then there's today... hehehe
I went to Justins skool again, I ended up going in to see Ellen but came out with so much more.... Carissa. She is so awesome, really, I dont know what I was thinking, moving to NH, starting a new life. Yeah right. So I'm moving to Mass. Soon. Its going to be awesome. I'm looking for a place around North Hampton and its so nice, I already found one place but I nee dto talk to some other eople to see whats up with them. I dont know really whats going on but something tells me whatever happens is going to be good.
So Carissa and I chilled all day in Noho and it was nice, I kissed her at Smith College, in the little Japanese thing and then it was all just so... obvious. from then on I guess I noticed a lot of things... like she feels the same way for me as I felt for someone not too long ago. It makes me think of her... I saw a girl today sitting on the steps that looked just like her, the only thing different was the lack of tattooes and the overpowering beauty that almost knocked the wind out of me. I would have stopped and talked to her... if I hadnt remembered I was holding Carissa's hand... and I liked it. I've held a lot of hands and I've kissed a lot of lips and loved very few all at once, but this was so weird. I lost myself.
But I dont know what to think. Carissa is amazing and happy and up-lifting and everything that I want in a partner or whatever you want to call it. Girlfriend...partner...friend....buddy with benefits.... whatever, i dont care. She is so amazing and I cant stop thinking about her. I cant wait to get home tomorrow and write in my journal that I keep next to my bed all about her. I just wish she had let me take more pictures.
She's fucking head over heals about me. She is so crazy but I dont know what to do. I really hate to think that I could ever hurt her. I broke up with someone for the first time lastnight and it sucked, I could never do that to her. Because I dont ever want her to feel that. I dont want her to feel like she needs to cause drama just to get me to notice her. I always will.
I hope I can make her mine...
I hope she'll have me. If not, then I am happy just to be her friend if nothing more. She is so worth it. Every smile is worth it.
-sxkx
((((((::::::someones got a hold on me:::::::)))))))))
Carissa, you were absolutly amazing, every kiss was so perfect and I loved every minute I spent with you, I will never forget today and everything that happened, it was truly awesome, thank you so much. You are an amazing person and I hope I see you again soon, very soon, Im planning on coming back next weekend, I miss you already, I'll talk to you soon.... check ur email ;) miss you.
w00t
what a fuckin day.
lastnigth I stayed up all night talking on the phone to an awesome friend of mine. we talked abuot whats happening with all the bullshit drama and she convinced me to break up with Devinne. So I did. Seriously, I've decided to listen to everything that this friend says because she is seriously ALWAYS right about everything, for the past two years of our friendship, hate and love shes been right through it all..... I love that about her, love it all. lol. sooooooo, I text messaged Devinne while I was on the phone with her and ended it all, because she was right. Devinne only drags me down, she has no respect, and no real expirience and a lot to learn. so that ended nicely... but then there's today... hehehe
I went to Justins skool again, I ended up going in to see Ellen but came out with so much more.... Carissa. She is so awesome, really, I dont know what I was thinking, moving to NH, starting a new life. Yeah right. So I'm moving to Mass. Soon. Its going to be awesome. I'm looking for a place around North Hampton and its so nice, I already found one place but I nee dto talk to some other eople to see whats up with them. I dont know really whats going on but something tells me whatever happens is going to be good.
So Carissa and I chilled all day in Noho and it was nice, I kissed her at Smith College, in the little Japanese thing and then it was all just so... obvious. from then on I guess I noticed a lot of things... like she feels the same way for me as I felt for someone not too long ago. It makes me think of her... I saw a girl today sitting on the steps that looked just like her, the only thing different was the lack of tattooes and the overpowering beauty that almost knocked the wind out of me. I would have stopped and talked to her... if I hadnt remembered I was holding Carissa's hand... and I liked it. I've held a lot of hands and I've kissed a lot of lips and loved very few all at once, but this was so weird. I lost myself.
But I dont know what to think. Carissa is amazing and happy and up-lifting and everything that I want in a partner or whatever you want to call it. Girlfriend...partner...friend....buddy with benefits.... whatever, i dont care. She is so amazing and I cant stop thinking about her. I cant wait to get home tomorrow and write in my journal that I keep next to my bed all about her. I just wish she had let me take more pictures.
She's fucking head over heals about me. She is so crazy but I dont know what to do. I really hate to think that I could ever hurt her. I broke up with someone for the first time lastnight and it sucked, I could never do that to her. Because I dont ever want her to feel that. I dont want her to feel like she needs to cause drama just to get me to notice her. I always will.
I hope I can make her mine...
I hope she'll have me. If not, then I am happy just to be her friend if nothing more. She is so worth it. Every smile is worth it.
-sxkx
((((((::::::someones got a hold on me:::::::)))))))))