Here I am again...
I guess a lot has happened since my first posting. One of my friends at work quit yesterday. She just got fed up and quit. Let me give you some background on why this has been on my mind. In my section of our group, there were 5: My boss D, myself, and 3 ladies, J, S, and K. I dubbed us "Charlie's Angels" because my boss is rarely seen (a LOT of emails though), I am Bosley (Charlie's Angels: Full Throttle), and, naturally, the ladies were the Angels. Well, the Angel who just quit (J) actually stopped working for our boss; she was still part of the overall group. So I lost one. Then my 2nd angel (and cubemate, S) got a better job and left. Down to myself and the last angel. She ALMOST left, but my unit did something very uncharacteristic - they made a better offer. So K and I are all that is left. We are 2 people trying to keep up with the workload of 8. That may explain why I have been working in Staten Island for the last 2 and a half weeks. I'll put it this way, I have only been in my office 2 days since I started this project on March 25th. So J is no longer around. Guess who is going to have to help pick up the load? Did you guess K and I?
I don't know if I can handle it. I already have detested going to work since December (when the workload and the deadlines became unrealistic). I seem to have a real problem with people who plan poorly or not at all, then come to me with ridiculous demands to get things done. And that has been the case since December. I am REALLY appreciating the sign I saw - "A lack of planning on your part does not constitute an emergency on mine." Nik is already worried about me because she can tell that I am not happy and things do not seem to be improving. Have I spoken to my bosses about the situation? Of course, but I don't see anything changing. At least when K got the other job offer, they countered with a SUBSTANTIAL increase in pay. We're talking $15K. So now she, who started almost a whole year after me, now makes $15K more than I do. I'm not mad at her at all. I love K...she's my partner. I just wish that the powers that be would sprinkle some additional funds my way since I have been busting my ass to get things done. But I doubt that will ever happen. I've started working on my resume again because I have come to realize that Nikki was right - I have to do something to make myself happy. But I have no idea what that is. I know that if money were no object, I would want to own a store that sold media (CDs, DVDs, books, video games, etc.) kinda like Tower Records but smaller. Like a mom'n'pop store. Like the ones in the Village.
I know the real reason J left. She felt that she wasn't being appreciated for all her hard work. I know that feeling all too well; most of us at our job do. She just got tired of it all. I can't blame her. I know that is one of the main reasons for my unhappiness. Everyone likes to be told when they are doing well - we all like the recognition that what we are doing counts. We don't get that at my job...and we are getting tired of it. Some people are able to deal with it better than others. At least K got some extra money out of it. It seems that the only way to get any kind of recognition is not to do well for the company...but to do well for yourself and threaten to leave the company when they need you. I guess why I'm writing this is in hoping that somewhere, somehow an answer or at least a direction I should take will come out of it. I want to be happy. I almost think that it is pointless looking for another job because Nikki and I don't plan on living in New York for more than a couple of more years. So should I try and get another job that I'll just have to leave in a few years? Or do I stay and hope that things get better? For the sake of my happiness...and the love of my soon-to-be wife, I think I may have to swallow my fear and look for something else. But I'm scared...I may not know what direction to take or what to do, but I know one thing...I'm scared.
I don't know if I can handle it. I already have detested going to work since December (when the workload and the deadlines became unrealistic). I seem to have a real problem with people who plan poorly or not at all, then come to me with ridiculous demands to get things done. And that has been the case since December. I am REALLY appreciating the sign I saw - "A lack of planning on your part does not constitute an emergency on mine." Nik is already worried about me because she can tell that I am not happy and things do not seem to be improving. Have I spoken to my bosses about the situation? Of course, but I don't see anything changing. At least when K got the other job offer, they countered with a SUBSTANTIAL increase in pay. We're talking $15K. So now she, who started almost a whole year after me, now makes $15K more than I do. I'm not mad at her at all. I love K...she's my partner. I just wish that the powers that be would sprinkle some additional funds my way since I have been busting my ass to get things done. But I doubt that will ever happen. I've started working on my resume again because I have come to realize that Nikki was right - I have to do something to make myself happy. But I have no idea what that is. I know that if money were no object, I would want to own a store that sold media (CDs, DVDs, books, video games, etc.) kinda like Tower Records but smaller. Like a mom'n'pop store. Like the ones in the Village.
I know the real reason J left. She felt that she wasn't being appreciated for all her hard work. I know that feeling all too well; most of us at our job do. She just got tired of it all. I can't blame her. I know that is one of the main reasons for my unhappiness. Everyone likes to be told when they are doing well - we all like the recognition that what we are doing counts. We don't get that at my job...and we are getting tired of it. Some people are able to deal with it better than others. At least K got some extra money out of it. It seems that the only way to get any kind of recognition is not to do well for the company...but to do well for yourself and threaten to leave the company when they need you. I guess why I'm writing this is in hoping that somewhere, somehow an answer or at least a direction I should take will come out of it. I want to be happy. I almost think that it is pointless looking for another job because Nikki and I don't plan on living in New York for more than a couple of more years. So should I try and get another job that I'll just have to leave in a few years? Or do I stay and hope that things get better? For the sake of my happiness...and the love of my soon-to-be wife, I think I may have to swallow my fear and look for something else. But I'm scared...I may not know what direction to take or what to do, but I know one thing...I'm scared.