A year of standing still.
On this day, which marks the year and a day anniversary of my life changing gears very rapidly, I have come to the conclusion that I did very little for a year. I stood still. I looked for work sporadically, I spoke a lot about future plans I had no intention of carrying out, and now, after a year of doing nothing, I think its time I did something.
My resumes are being sent out. First in a spread up north, then in this area. Then I find work. Then, if necessary, I move. Then I work, and do something with my life.
One major reason I want to go north, and no offense to anyone here in NJ, is that I want to move on in my life, and I feel like here, this place, is neutral in gear for me. I don't have that sense I can do anything here, be anyone here. And there is the fact that I want to see if I can make it on my own. It seems like a challenge.
I can't rely on odd-jobs and babysitting to keep me in gas and beer money, and I probably shouldn't drink as much as I was last year. I can't say it got me in trouble, but it certainly can't have been great for my liver. I did get some funny stories out of it, so it was worth something.
My dreams this past week have been odd, to say the least. Walking through crowds, seeking specific people, having people I know stop me to say hi, being weighed down by the crowd, slowed down, being unable to catch up to that person or persons I sought. Its my fault for being so damned friendly that other people can stop me in a crowd with a "hi pat" while I look for someone else. I am polite to the point of insanity, even in my own dreams. Odd, I guess.
I hope, that a year from now, I can call this upcoming 'scholastic year' the year of motion, or the year of progress. A year of the status quo is kinda boring.
My resumes are being sent out. First in a spread up north, then in this area. Then I find work. Then, if necessary, I move. Then I work, and do something with my life.
One major reason I want to go north, and no offense to anyone here in NJ, is that I want to move on in my life, and I feel like here, this place, is neutral in gear for me. I don't have that sense I can do anything here, be anyone here. And there is the fact that I want to see if I can make it on my own. It seems like a challenge.
I can't rely on odd-jobs and babysitting to keep me in gas and beer money, and I probably shouldn't drink as much as I was last year. I can't say it got me in trouble, but it certainly can't have been great for my liver. I did get some funny stories out of it, so it was worth something.
My dreams this past week have been odd, to say the least. Walking through crowds, seeking specific people, having people I know stop me to say hi, being weighed down by the crowd, slowed down, being unable to catch up to that person or persons I sought. Its my fault for being so damned friendly that other people can stop me in a crowd with a "hi pat" while I look for someone else. I am polite to the point of insanity, even in my own dreams. Odd, I guess.
I hope, that a year from now, I can call this upcoming 'scholastic year' the year of motion, or the year of progress. A year of the status quo is kinda boring.