(no subject)
Ok so its been 10 years since i have kept a journal. So this should be interesting. Beware, I get carried away and you will all think i am crazy. Some one is going to have to show me how to get my pic on this thing.
So today was kinda weird. I finally stepped back into the real world of NOT studying! For the past week and a half or so it's been nothing but sitting at my desk memorizing useless facts that I will never benefit from for the rest of my life. or so it seems... I think I failed my math final which means that I failed the class...i fucking hate school. i feel so pointless when i am there. I dont know what the hell i am doing. or do i. Some times i feel like i know and then I dont.
Anyways, I got my life back today and of course while I was in hiding, i missed some very important events in which I feel kinda gulity for. First marie informed me on monday that it was Cathies birthday... I left her a message on weds but no return call. Then I failed to get my shit together for jacks last day at work. Leaving is such an awkward thing. and i have such a hard time telling people how i really feel about them when i am really need to. Its like i am in denial that she is even gone. I dont want to think of how i am going to deal with things at pr without turning next to her at the personalizing table and writting notes. Anyways it was a day that I didnt prepare for needless to say. Plus i am a little bit worried that i wont be able to fill her shoes, so to speak, with all the responiblities.
Most of all as much as i know HOT Topic will make her happy, it will make me extreemly sad to not see her every day when i come down those stairs.
So today was kinda weird. I finally stepped back into the real world of NOT studying! For the past week and a half or so it's been nothing but sitting at my desk memorizing useless facts that I will never benefit from for the rest of my life. or so it seems... I think I failed my math final which means that I failed the class...i fucking hate school. i feel so pointless when i am there. I dont know what the hell i am doing. or do i. Some times i feel like i know and then I dont.
Anyways, I got my life back today and of course while I was in hiding, i missed some very important events in which I feel kinda gulity for. First marie informed me on monday that it was Cathies birthday... I left her a message on weds but no return call. Then I failed to get my shit together for jacks last day at work. Leaving is such an awkward thing. and i have such a hard time telling people how i really feel about them when i am really need to. Its like i am in denial that she is even gone. I dont want to think of how i am going to deal with things at pr without turning next to her at the personalizing table and writting notes. Anyways it was a day that I didnt prepare for needless to say. Plus i am a little bit worried that i wont be able to fill her shoes, so to speak, with all the responiblities.
Most of all as much as i know HOT Topic will make her happy, it will make me extreemly sad to not see her every day when i come down those stairs.