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Feb 02, 2006 08:56







he's so goofy. that's him with my mom. the GRANDMA. haha. i made her old.

so, a lot of not-good things have been going on. well, besides me not being able to walk or function because of a bunch of different pain problems [which i was so greatly accused of being a "pos" and "lazy" about. thanks "best friend" spencer.]

my mom and daniel's mom and desiree offered to watch kaidan for this week while daniel and i come back up here so i can get some things done for myself and so i could rest up. call after call has been made and the stupid insurance STILL hasnt authorized my Remicade IV infusion medication. but whatever. not like it would work anyway, right? i mean, come on, this is MY life. when does anything ever work?

I have some blood-work to go get taken care of and a cat scan next week of my small intestines because while they are able to look through the large intestines through a surgery called a colonoscopy, the small intestines are just too small to examine in that way.





the area around the jumbled up organs is the large intestine. [the jumbled up organs being the small intestine]
for now, my large intestines are fine up until it gets to the part in which i colorized purple. that's where the infection starts to get pretty bad.

the part i colorized red, is REALLY bad and near deteriorating. oooh those pictures they took of it were SO awful. but it's why my abdomen hurts SO badly. i just THINK of anything even coming close to touching something that looks like that and have it hurting. no wonder why it feels like i am always digesting glass. no wonder i haven't eaten in goodness knows how long [down 12Lbs, by the way. heh] but the remicade is *supposed* to help. if not, they'll have to do surgery to remove that red part at least, but it doesn't matter because then the disease will just move on to another part of the intestines. and if no medication is helping.... =/ but hopefully the Remicade will. it did last time [3 years ago], but the problem with it is that because i have been on it before, then taken off of it, there is a 50/50% chance of developing something called "Serum Sickness" which, the doctor said, is 50x worse than having just the "normal" Crohn's pains and problems. yay.

So Crohn's Disease mainly effects your intestines. it inflames them, and infects them, and all of that fun stuff.
there are also a LOT of other problems associated with it.

-Ulcers/open lesions/sores - EVERYWHERE. inside and out. i have ulcers on my intestines, but i also have them on my legs, torso, chest, and i even get them "down under". Which is the most EXCRUCIATING pain EVER. ESPECIALLY when you have to urinate. it's like pouring acid into an open wound. in fact, that's exactly what it is. and it HURTS.
-joint pain/swelling - and this is why i can barely walk. my ankles and knees get so swollen and hur so badly and i loose all function of them. it's so bad. i wake up at night sometimes and cant move my legs and think "oh no, this is it..." thinking i've lost them forever. they always ache and i can never seem to get into a comfortable position - even if it's laying down or sitting.

those are the most common, and what i am having to deal with to date...

sorry if it's TMI. YOU clicked it =P but yeah.. that's that.

so i am just trying to get things done, and i am. i just wish i could do more while the little guy isn't here. like CLEAN. this place is so gross. but i cant bend down and even stand up long enough to do much of anything. laundry is the only thing i can seem to accomplish, and there's only so much laundry you can do.

but i have a bunch of calls to make, so i should get started on those in a bit. i didn't realize it was already 9am.
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