Thoughts and ruminations on the year that was (2011 edition)
This year was the biggest step forward that I've taken as a writer, ever. I actually posted my work. Online. For the world to see. It was by far the scariest thing I've ever done. I can't say that I no longer feared what people would say. I more than anyone recognize that my brain works differently than other people's. But I also realized that if I wanted to make a living as a writer someday, I needed to expose myself to the opinions of people who don't share my last name.
Still, posting that first story had me tied in knots. And then I got that first review. Oh boy. I found out pretty quick that reviews are as addicting as chocolate (or crack, if I'm honest). It feels like Christmas morning every time I get a review. What's even more fun is when someone favorites my story, or adds me to their favorite author's list. It tells me that I'm hitting the right notes in my stories, and people are connecting with me as a writer and not just with the occasional story.
I also took some big steps as a writer this year. I've stretched myself to write outside my comfort zone, choosing styles and subjects that I might not have before. I dipped my toe into the slash pool and found it was a bit tougher than I'd expected. I'm a het girl, and I think I'll always be a het girl, but I found out that I can write slash and make it believable. I still don't write much smut-it's not the easiest thing in the world to write-but I'm learning. I'm not sure that's a good thing.
I've also stretched myself to see more than just the canon pairings in any fandom. Finding ways to make those pairings work has been fun, and seeing rare pairs get some airtime has brought me new fans and new insights into the characters.
And instead of sticking to the same narrative style and perspective-third person omniscient-I've tried on others: third person limited, first person limited, present tense. I've tried on angst, and though I'm not overly fond of it, I've found I can write it well. I've done multi-chapter stories and I dove in head first to the drabble pool. I found out that it's a lot harder than it looks to limit yourself to one hundred, two hundred or three hundred words.
Many thanks for this year's successes, particularly the ladies at slashchat. Thanks also go to emmademarais, for being a great cheering section, encourager/enabler, and all around wonderful person. And for letting me steal her format for this year-end retrospective.
So, the highlights from this year:
My Favorites:
Lucky
Rain
Sparks
Kissing Cousins
The Velvet Dog
While The Cat's Away
You Can Run
Colder Weather
Politics, Religion and Her
The Coming Light of Dawn
Got Visa?
Best stories:
Closure
Rain
Spousal Support
Kissing Cousins
Smoke & Mirrors
The Time Has Come
Sleeping Beauty Syndrome
Most underappreciated by the universe:
Who I Am - It was a companion piece to Who You Are, so it was a bit redundant in that the dialog was the same, and only the inner thoughts were different. It sat out there for weeks before someone actually reviewed it. I can only shrug, because I never know what people will like and I wrote it for myself mostly.
Phone Call (The Busted Remix) - As a remix, I know it doesn't hold up as well to the original, and releasing it at the end of the year as I did didn't help, but it still kills me when I see a story languish without comment.
Most reviewed:
Closure - One of my reviewers was tweeting lines from the story to his followers. As a result, I had by far the most reviews for any of my stories on that one. Sixteen (16!) reviews! I walked on Cloud 9 for a long time after that.
Most fun to write:
Spousal Support - I may have complained about the Pinyin, but I couldn't stop giggling as I was writing it.
Crimefighters - I wrote this story simply so I could get to the part about the team being compared to the Scoobies. That was the whole point, all 1200 words or so. But it was fun getting there.
Got Visa? - This was an original fic that was written for my dad. It grew out of a conversation we had at the table one day. Don't know what triggered it, but he made reference to the sheriffs in Arizona asking the illegals crossing the border for their papers. I snarked back that I could just see a sheriff doing that to an alien landing in the desert. And thus, fic is born.
Sexiest story:
While The Cat's Away - I don't write smut, usually, and this barely qualifies, but it did raise the temperature in the room.
Kissing Cousins - No sex, and yet still you could cut the sexual tension with a knife.
Hardest story to write:
The Time Has Come - I'd never written slash before this year, and so I was daunted by the idea of writing a slashy romance. A PG-13 slashy romance, but still…I mean, what do I know about two men falling in love? I can barely get my own love life in order. Still, I think it came out okay.
Sparks - I'd been trying to write that story for a while, the introspective piece on Kate Beckett, but it just wouldn't come. Then I hit upon this idea and it finally came together. I like the imagery in this story our of all the stories I've written.
Holy crap, that's wrong, even for you:
I am pretty vanilla, so there's probably never going to be anything that I write that'll just freak people out.
Biggest disappointment :
Who I Am - It got exactly one review. I have no doubt that it was read - the statistics say it was - but it was still hard to see it languish without acknowledgement. It was a companion piece to Who You Are, and that one got feedback, so I know it wasn't the story. I took a risk on that one, because it was basically a retelling of Who You Are from a different perspective, but it still sucks when it goes unappreciated.
Biggest surprise:
Any Numb3rs fic - Really, take your pick, because the biggest surprise to me is that I wrote for Numb3rs, but also that I wrote so much for Numb3rs.
Best line:
"A girl," Kate said, her anger asserting itself once more. "Your 'sensitive undercover op' was a girl? And you're pissed at me?"
"Hey, we were tracking an arms dealer," he argued.
"Oh, because that sounds so much better than playing doctor with a doctor," she said. "I don't believe you."
~Smoke & Mirrors
Sparks fly between them, reflecting back and blending with the lights of the city beyond to create their very own fireworks display.
~Sparks
Story that shifted my perception of the characters:
The Time Has Come - Billy is, as always, a blank canvas, so I made my Billy who I wanted him to be. But writing Charlie was tough. I have no idea what it's like to be a genius, and no idea how it feels to be ruled by numbers. So this was a stretch. And in terms of research, I did reams of it, for my original characters and for the canon ones. I felt like my notes were longer than the actual story.
Unfinished Business - I learned that even the most difficult to understand characters can open themselves to you if you'll just make the effort. I'd been reluctant to focus on Ian before, but after this, I think I can write him pretty well.
Most telling fic:
Snake Charmer - It was the first slash story I'd ever written and published, and it led to an even bigger story, The Time Has Come. I never thought I'd do it, but if I want to stretch as a writer, this is the way to do it.
Story I want remembered:
Sparks - I like the imagery in this one, and the tender, angsty yet hopeful tone. It's not long, but I think it succeeds where it counts, showing the relationship between Kate Beckett and Rick Castle.
Politics, Religion and Her - Again, quite angsty, but it's a character study of Daniel Jackson, and as such it dives deeper than just the surface ideas about his character. It's always been one of my favorites, and I'm glad I published it this year.
Spousal Support - In 300 words, it encompasses everything that's good about Numb3rs.
The Elephant in the Room - Again, it encompasses all that's best about NCIS: Los Angeles. The banter, the camaraderie, and the goofiness. And just a little Callen/Kensi for good measure.
Still, posting that first story had me tied in knots. And then I got that first review. Oh boy. I found out pretty quick that reviews are as addicting as chocolate (or crack, if I'm honest). It feels like Christmas morning every time I get a review. What's even more fun is when someone favorites my story, or adds me to their favorite author's list. It tells me that I'm hitting the right notes in my stories, and people are connecting with me as a writer and not just with the occasional story.
I also took some big steps as a writer this year. I've stretched myself to write outside my comfort zone, choosing styles and subjects that I might not have before. I dipped my toe into the slash pool and found it was a bit tougher than I'd expected. I'm a het girl, and I think I'll always be a het girl, but I found out that I can write slash and make it believable. I still don't write much smut-it's not the easiest thing in the world to write-but I'm learning. I'm not sure that's a good thing.
I've also stretched myself to see more than just the canon pairings in any fandom. Finding ways to make those pairings work has been fun, and seeing rare pairs get some airtime has brought me new fans and new insights into the characters.
And instead of sticking to the same narrative style and perspective-third person omniscient-I've tried on others: third person limited, first person limited, present tense. I've tried on angst, and though I'm not overly fond of it, I've found I can write it well. I've done multi-chapter stories and I dove in head first to the drabble pool. I found out that it's a lot harder than it looks to limit yourself to one hundred, two hundred or three hundred words.
Many thanks for this year's successes, particularly the ladies at slashchat. Thanks also go to emmademarais, for being a great cheering section, encourager/enabler, and all around wonderful person. And for letting me steal her format for this year-end retrospective.
So, the highlights from this year:
My Favorites:
Lucky
Rain
Sparks
Kissing Cousins
The Velvet Dog
While The Cat's Away
You Can Run
Colder Weather
Politics, Religion and Her
The Coming Light of Dawn
Got Visa?
Best stories:
Closure
Rain
Spousal Support
Kissing Cousins
Smoke & Mirrors
The Time Has Come
Sleeping Beauty Syndrome
Most underappreciated by the universe:
Who I Am - It was a companion piece to Who You Are, so it was a bit redundant in that the dialog was the same, and only the inner thoughts were different. It sat out there for weeks before someone actually reviewed it. I can only shrug, because I never know what people will like and I wrote it for myself mostly.
Phone Call (The Busted Remix) - As a remix, I know it doesn't hold up as well to the original, and releasing it at the end of the year as I did didn't help, but it still kills me when I see a story languish without comment.
Most reviewed:
Closure - One of my reviewers was tweeting lines from the story to his followers. As a result, I had by far the most reviews for any of my stories on that one. Sixteen (16!) reviews! I walked on Cloud 9 for a long time after that.
Most fun to write:
Spousal Support - I may have complained about the Pinyin, but I couldn't stop giggling as I was writing it.
Crimefighters - I wrote this story simply so I could get to the part about the team being compared to the Scoobies. That was the whole point, all 1200 words or so. But it was fun getting there.
Got Visa? - This was an original fic that was written for my dad. It grew out of a conversation we had at the table one day. Don't know what triggered it, but he made reference to the sheriffs in Arizona asking the illegals crossing the border for their papers. I snarked back that I could just see a sheriff doing that to an alien landing in the desert. And thus, fic is born.
Sexiest story:
While The Cat's Away - I don't write smut, usually, and this barely qualifies, but it did raise the temperature in the room.
Kissing Cousins - No sex, and yet still you could cut the sexual tension with a knife.
Hardest story to write:
The Time Has Come - I'd never written slash before this year, and so I was daunted by the idea of writing a slashy romance. A PG-13 slashy romance, but still…I mean, what do I know about two men falling in love? I can barely get my own love life in order. Still, I think it came out okay.
Sparks - I'd been trying to write that story for a while, the introspective piece on Kate Beckett, but it just wouldn't come. Then I hit upon this idea and it finally came together. I like the imagery in this story our of all the stories I've written.
Holy crap, that's wrong, even for you:
I am pretty vanilla, so there's probably never going to be anything that I write that'll just freak people out.
Biggest disappointment :
Who I Am - It got exactly one review. I have no doubt that it was read - the statistics say it was - but it was still hard to see it languish without acknowledgement. It was a companion piece to Who You Are, and that one got feedback, so I know it wasn't the story. I took a risk on that one, because it was basically a retelling of Who You Are from a different perspective, but it still sucks when it goes unappreciated.
Biggest surprise:
Any Numb3rs fic - Really, take your pick, because the biggest surprise to me is that I wrote for Numb3rs, but also that I wrote so much for Numb3rs.
Best line:
"A girl," Kate said, her anger asserting itself once more. "Your 'sensitive undercover op' was a girl? And you're pissed at me?"
"Hey, we were tracking an arms dealer," he argued.
"Oh, because that sounds so much better than playing doctor with a doctor," she said. "I don't believe you."
~Smoke & Mirrors
Sparks fly between them, reflecting back and blending with the lights of the city beyond to create their very own fireworks display.
~Sparks
Story that shifted my perception of the characters:
The Time Has Come - Billy is, as always, a blank canvas, so I made my Billy who I wanted him to be. But writing Charlie was tough. I have no idea what it's like to be a genius, and no idea how it feels to be ruled by numbers. So this was a stretch. And in terms of research, I did reams of it, for my original characters and for the canon ones. I felt like my notes were longer than the actual story.
Unfinished Business - I learned that even the most difficult to understand characters can open themselves to you if you'll just make the effort. I'd been reluctant to focus on Ian before, but after this, I think I can write him pretty well.
Most telling fic:
Snake Charmer - It was the first slash story I'd ever written and published, and it led to an even bigger story, The Time Has Come. I never thought I'd do it, but if I want to stretch as a writer, this is the way to do it.
Story I want remembered:
Sparks - I like the imagery in this one, and the tender, angsty yet hopeful tone. It's not long, but I think it succeeds where it counts, showing the relationship between Kate Beckett and Rick Castle.
Politics, Religion and Her - Again, quite angsty, but it's a character study of Daniel Jackson, and as such it dives deeper than just the surface ideas about his character. It's always been one of my favorites, and I'm glad I published it this year.
Spousal Support - In 300 words, it encompasses everything that's good about Numb3rs.
The Elephant in the Room - Again, it encompasses all that's best about NCIS: Los Angeles. The banter, the camaraderie, and the goofiness. And just a little Callen/Kensi for good measure.