My woes
Random complaints...
I feel like such shit right now and I'm feelin waay too "blah." I hate it.
Yesterday I was really upset with someone that I didnt even see or speak to the whole day. I was pissed by my expectations. I anticipated an event that never occurred, and I must say that I am glad that it didn't. I was just waiting for them to say something to me so that I could flip out and I just don't thnk that's right...
Then I was up all night doing far more than my share of the work for a group speech that was due today. Thankfully, we didn't have to do the speech today, becaue I was not feeling good about it at all. I'm supposed to be in a group with 5 other people, yet only 3 other people have done any work(and one of them is so slow that she might was well not be doing anything). Why is it that I never, ok hardly ever get put into groups with intelligent people anymore? Back in high school if I had to do a group assignment, at least I could count on my group to pull their weight. I mean the people I work with these days are so mindless, for the most part. There are the ones who do whatever I say and then those who don't do shit and expect everyone to get them an A. I'm sorry, but i just can't stand for that shit. I miss people who think for themselves; who challenge me. There are a few people like that around here, and I love them for that, but most others just need to have a book on critical thinking shoved down their throats.[Pardon the violent tone]My only solace last night, was Ryan. He's always there when I can't think anymore or I need that jolt to the brain and I appreciate that soo much.
Earlier, I felt so invisble. It always baffles me how rude some people can be...Who opens a door with someone standing right in front of it? Not slowly and not to hand you the door. I mean to fucking plow over you and keep going. This happenes to me way to much. Then in my Telecom class, I must have waited 5 minutes to talk to my professor while other people just butted in front of me and cut me off to speak to her first. Now that would have been excusable if I weren't standing DIRECTLY in front of the lady(so they had to actually step in between us). I'll just chalk it up as me being sick, so I'm not feelin too assertive...how can some people see me as so assertive and others as unimposing all together; not there at all? Arrgh, I know I am not invisible, but it's just hard not to believe when people try to walk all over me. Why are Morganites so effin RUDE?!
I just have so much on my plate right now. And I realized a few minutes ago that it is stressing me out. I am never really aware of my stress until it starts aking me sick, because I am sure that I shouldn't still be sick from an allergy I had last Friday. Now I'm even getting headaches, which are just way too crucial..my high school headaches were hell! Luckily I've been stopping them before they get too bad, but I really shouldn't be havng them at all and they keep coming back. I have absolutely no appetite and that's just wrong too. I mean, over the last 3 days I haven't had one full meal. I'm not the type of person to sit around and force myself to eat when I'm not hungry...so I just don't. I may nibble, but that's about it. I tell myself "It's good that I'm not hungry..I could stand to miss a meal or two anyway", but when the headaches come on I KNOW that I should have had that slice of pizza and not just a few doritos.
I know all of this is unhealthy, but I cant seem to stop it/myself when I'm stressed. Mainly because I don't know I'm stressed until it's too late.
I feel like such shit right now and I'm feelin waay too "blah." I hate it.
Yesterday I was really upset with someone that I didnt even see or speak to the whole day. I was pissed by my expectations. I anticipated an event that never occurred, and I must say that I am glad that it didn't. I was just waiting for them to say something to me so that I could flip out and I just don't thnk that's right...
Then I was up all night doing far more than my share of the work for a group speech that was due today. Thankfully, we didn't have to do the speech today, becaue I was not feeling good about it at all. I'm supposed to be in a group with 5 other people, yet only 3 other people have done any work(and one of them is so slow that she might was well not be doing anything). Why is it that I never, ok hardly ever get put into groups with intelligent people anymore? Back in high school if I had to do a group assignment, at least I could count on my group to pull their weight. I mean the people I work with these days are so mindless, for the most part. There are the ones who do whatever I say and then those who don't do shit and expect everyone to get them an A. I'm sorry, but i just can't stand for that shit. I miss people who think for themselves; who challenge me. There are a few people like that around here, and I love them for that, but most others just need to have a book on critical thinking shoved down their throats.[Pardon the violent tone]My only solace last night, was Ryan. He's always there when I can't think anymore or I need that jolt to the brain and I appreciate that soo much.
Earlier, I felt so invisble. It always baffles me how rude some people can be...Who opens a door with someone standing right in front of it? Not slowly and not to hand you the door. I mean to fucking plow over you and keep going. This happenes to me way to much. Then in my Telecom class, I must have waited 5 minutes to talk to my professor while other people just butted in front of me and cut me off to speak to her first. Now that would have been excusable if I weren't standing DIRECTLY in front of the lady(so they had to actually step in between us). I'll just chalk it up as me being sick, so I'm not feelin too assertive...how can some people see me as so assertive and others as unimposing all together; not there at all? Arrgh, I know I am not invisible, but it's just hard not to believe when people try to walk all over me. Why are Morganites so effin RUDE?!
I just have so much on my plate right now. And I realized a few minutes ago that it is stressing me out. I am never really aware of my stress until it starts aking me sick, because I am sure that I shouldn't still be sick from an allergy I had last Friday. Now I'm even getting headaches, which are just way too crucial..my high school headaches were hell! Luckily I've been stopping them before they get too bad, but I really shouldn't be havng them at all and they keep coming back. I have absolutely no appetite and that's just wrong too. I mean, over the last 3 days I haven't had one full meal. I'm not the type of person to sit around and force myself to eat when I'm not hungry...so I just don't. I may nibble, but that's about it. I tell myself "It's good that I'm not hungry..I could stand to miss a meal or two anyway", but when the headaches come on I KNOW that I should have had that slice of pizza and not just a few doritos.
I know all of this is unhealthy, but I cant seem to stop it/myself when I'm stressed. Mainly because I don't know I'm stressed until it's too late.