This story is breath-takingly gorgeous, guh, I don't even think I can properly convey all of my love for this in words. (but I will certainly try)
This is the first story I read by you (followed link from a comm) and what struck me at first was, well, the lack of capitalization. Which was slightly unusual but not terribly unheard of (e e cummings is my favorite poet in the world, so), and at the time I was curious to see what you did with it. As I read further, I realized that this was the perfect choice and I am still picking up my jaw from the floor. Wow. Without the caps, this story feels so much more...raw, powerful. Like it has been stripped down to expose only what really matters. God, I don't even know to describe it, but it is absolutely stunning and really separates you out from the rest.
I love tear-jerkers and end of the world settings, and this has got to be one of the best I've read. Hands down. It's poetic and evocative of quiet mornings spent watching the rain fall; the mood you created had just the right touch of hopelessness and yearning, and how do you even manage to do that?
they might never hear another recorded version of the songs they love so they sing for each other. - just, the idea of this is so perfect and heart-breaking. Loved, loved, reading it. Really stuck out in my mind.
william. gabe. They are so perfect for each other in this that, for some ridiculous reason, it makes me want to cry.
"when the rain stops," gabe whispers into his ear as they lose their jeans and william loses the ability to breathe for a moment. "when the rain stops, i'm gonna marry you, boy. we'll marry in the sun, against the stone of ruined buildings, with the washed out city and the water receding as we say our vows." - WOW. Just, wow. No words to describe this. I am in love.
Ack, just checked the clock and I'm ten minutes late, oh well. I will be back to review more stories! (hopefully you aren't sick of my ramblings yet)
i realized after the last comment of yours that i replied to, that i'll never be able to thank you enough for what you've said about these stories. sometimes i write things and i hope for people to notice them but no one does. it seems to me that you've picked out all of the things i love about this story and you love them too, which makes my heart soar like you wouldn't even believe.
the focus for most people wasn't on gabe's optimism which is what you saw and what i really wanted to emphasize. even though they are essentially going to die and he is throwing the party, i wanted him to always have that "no we'll make it" thought in the back of his mind. i'm glad you picked that bit about getting married out because it was one of my favorite parts to write.
something about gabe and william always makes me happier, but that's a whole other story.
thank you thank you thank you. i can't express how much your words mean to me. as for the hopelessness and yearning at the same time? i didn't realize i did that but i think with two characters like bill and gabe being the main characters, they can both be either optimistic or pessimistic at the same time, so they're my way of making sure it isn't too depressing. does that make sense?
Wow. Thank you for taking the time to reply back! Honestly, you didn't have to, and I absolutely love hearing writers talk about their own work.
It makes sense to me. :-) You have such a wonderful grasp on characterizations that I feel like anything you write will never be too overdone or maudlin. And, oh yes, Gabe and William do make this world a better place. As does your icon, which made me grin for a whole minute. I can't pick one is more adorable. Guh.
(btw, I'm relieved to know I haven't scared you off yet.)
i'm one of those crazy people who loves to comment back and i absolutely appreciate all of the feedback i receive and i am also one of those crazy people who can't ever be scared off!
i'm glad my nonsense makes sense to someone other than myself, sigh, and that you appreciate gabe and william as much as they deserve to be appreciated.
This is the first story I read by you (followed link from a comm) and what struck me at first was, well, the lack of capitalization. Which was slightly unusual but not terribly unheard of (e e cummings is my favorite poet in the world, so), and at the time I was curious to see what you did with it. As I read further, I realized that this was the perfect choice and I am still picking up my jaw from the floor. Wow. Without the caps, this story feels so much more...raw, powerful. Like it has been stripped down to expose only what really matters. God, I don't even know to describe it, but it is absolutely stunning and really separates you out from the rest.
I love tear-jerkers and end of the world settings, and this has got to be one of the best I've read. Hands down. It's poetic and evocative of quiet mornings spent watching the rain fall; the mood you created had just the right touch of hopelessness and yearning, and how do you even manage to do that?
they might never hear another recorded version of the songs they love so they sing for each other. - just, the idea of this is so perfect and heart-breaking. Loved, loved, reading it. Really stuck out in my mind.
william. gabe. They are so perfect for each other in this that, for some ridiculous reason, it makes me want to cry.
"when the rain stops," gabe whispers into his ear as they lose their jeans and william loses the ability to breathe for a moment. "when the rain stops, i'm gonna marry you, boy. we'll marry in the sun, against the stone of ruined buildings, with the washed out city and the water receding as we say our vows." - WOW. Just, wow. No words to describe this. I am in love.
Ack, just checked the clock and I'm ten minutes late, oh well. I will be back to review more stories! (hopefully you aren't sick of my ramblings yet)
Reply
the focus for most people wasn't on gabe's optimism which is what you saw and what i really wanted to emphasize. even though they are essentially going to die and he is throwing the party, i wanted him to always have that "no we'll make it" thought in the back of his mind. i'm glad you picked that bit about getting married out because it was one of my favorite parts to write.
something about gabe and william always makes me happier, but that's a whole other story.
thank you thank you thank you. i can't express how much your words mean to me. as for the hopelessness and yearning at the same time? i didn't realize i did that but i think with two characters like bill and gabe being the main characters, they can both be either optimistic or pessimistic at the same time, so they're my way of making sure it isn't too depressing. does that make sense?
Reply
It makes sense to me. :-) You have such a wonderful grasp on characterizations that I feel like anything you write will never be too overdone or maudlin. And, oh yes, Gabe and William do make this world a better place. As does your icon, which made me grin for a whole minute. I can't pick one is more adorable. Guh.
(btw, I'm relieved to know I haven't scared you off yet.)
Reply
i'm glad my nonsense makes sense to someone other than myself, sigh, and that you appreciate gabe and william as much as they deserve to be appreciated.
the puppy. the puppy is cuter.
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