It was late Saturday morning in LA when Aphrodite finally found Gabrielle. The clone Gabrielle, anyway.
"Where the heck have you been, where's Xena, and what the Hades possessed the two of you to show up at a
Xena fan convention?" She put her hands on her hips. "They may have gotten a lot wrong on the tv show, but they did get people who looked like you."
"Oh, relax." Gabrielle ran a hand through her hair. "Look, Xe is going by Zara and I'm going by Mavis. Besides, I darkened my hair, and Xe cut hers." She glanced away. "A little. Anyway, no one's said anything!" There was a pause as the goddess stared at her. "Okay, maybe one guy."
'Dite rolled her eyes. "Look, you need to find Xena and leave. Like now. Where is she, anyway?"
"She's at this . . . Awareness something or other training. With, like, whoever played me in the show." Slapping a hand over her eyes, 'Dite resisted the urge to sigh. Gabrielle shrugged and continued. "She said she was interested to see what it was about, but I think she just wanted to stare at the woman for three hours."
"Greeeeaaat." This time there was no resistance, just a big sigh. "And what did you do?"
"Oh, Yoga! It was great. More on a beginner level, but the teacher was great." Another pause. "Even if she did look a lot like Callisto."
There was more staring. And shaking of blond curls. And staring. "Okay. So. You've visited the convention. Ready to go home?" 'Dite rolled up her sleeves. "I can take you now and come back for Xena."
"No." Gabrielle folded her arms. "No, we're going to stay. Besides, we paid a lot for these tickets just so we can sit closer."
"Closer?" The stare was turning into a glare. "Why?"
Gabs smiled. "Cause the guy who played Iolaus is coming on. And if he's as cute as the real thing, I wanna be close."
'Dite's voice was flat. "He's married."
"So? He's still cute."
****
After being unable to convince Gabrielle to leave the con, 'Dite turned her attention to two other people at the convention. Formerly a man, and formerly Xena in a past life, Harry's soul had been placed in the body of Annie by Ares. While Annie, formerly Joxer in a previous life, seemed to have trouble adapting to suddenly being a man again, Harry had settled comfortably into his her life with Mattie, who was Gabrielle in a previous life and currently psychic. Kind of.
Aphrodite found Harry and Mattie in a predictable place; curled up on a sofa outside the convention hall, talking to fans between kisses.
"So, you guys really are the reincarnations of Xena and Gabrielle?"
"Well, if you can't take Ares' word for it, whose are you gonna take?" Mattie took Harry's hand. "Right, sweetheart?"
"Absolutely, lover." They kissed again before Harry looked up at the group. "We should go inside; we don't want to miss the next guest."
"They should have you guys as guests!" Aphrodite had to roll her eyes at the enthusiasm of the fan who was looking exciting. "And then you can tell us what it was REALLY like in ancient Greece!"
Mattie and Harry both laughed. "Well," Mattie said as they stood, "it's not like we actually remember much of day to day living. Just bits, pieces, fights . . ."
"It's kind of like a dream you can only half remember." Harry straightened the ballcap she was wearing. It said 'Gabrielle' and had sais for the two 'l's. "I don't know that we could tell you much about it, really."
The group headed into the auditorium, and Aphrodite decided to follow. She was worried about Xena and Gabs running into, well, Xena and Gabs.
"'Scuze me."
"Hm?" 'Dite looked at the person standing at the door, then winced inwardly. She'd made herself visible to talk to Gabs and had forgotten to go invisible again. "Can I help you?"
"Can you show me a wrist band?"
"Wrist band?"
"Yeah." She pointed at the wrist of another fan walking in. "One of those. To show you paid for the con."
"Oh. Right." 'Dite zapped one onto her wrist, the same green color as the person that had just walked in. She raised her hand. "Are we good?"
"Go on in."
By the time she got into the auditorium, it was already dark, and the Iolaus look-alike was on stage, with another actress from the show, who happened to be his wife. The two of them were showing slides of what they'd been doing the previous year. Trying not to stumble in the dark, 'Dite headed toward the front and grabbed a seat.
"Hey." A tap on the shoulder made her turn, finding a woman with short hair and a 'Xena lives!' t-shirt, staring at her impatiently. "You're in my seat."
"Oh, sorry." She scooted over one.
"That's Terry's seat. She'll be back in a minute. Are you supposed to be in the gold section?"
"Gold? What?"
It turned out that the green wrist band was for general admission only. Aphrodite found herself at the back of the auditorium, on the far left side, in the second to last row. She could still see the stage, and the stars, but she couldn't keep an eye on Gabs or Xena, and Harry and Mattie had disappeared into the mass of people close to the stage.
And the person with the bag of Doritos was driving her crazy.
Deciding to wait until later, she folded her arms and watched.
******
There really wasn't a break in the program until late in the afternoon. It took a while to track them down, but finally Aphrodite saw Xena and Gabrielle at the far end of a corridor walking toward her. She put on her strongest glare, folded her arms, and began tapping her foot.
" . . . thought the writer guy was good," Gabrielle was saying. "And at least he wrote something pretty close to true."
"You mean Steve?" Xena nodded. "He seems okay. He's been wandering around talking to people and taking pictures. You should see if he'll look at your work."
"Uh, no, Xe, that's just tacky." Gabrielle shook her head. "What did you think of the other stars? I thought that Claire person was good, but they totally missed the boat on Velasca."
"Gotta agree." Xena shifted the bag she was carrying. "And the make up job on her? What was that funky thing with her eyes? Velaska's eyes were the same as -- as --" She looked up, finally noticing the goddess waiting for them. "The same as hers! Hi, Aphrodite, what are you doing here?"
"Oh. She wanted us to go home." Gabrielle shrugged.
"What? Why?"
"Because." 'Dite looked around, making sure no one could hear what she was about to say. "You, Xena, are at a Xena convention. Does that really sound like a smart thing to do?"
The two clones looked at each other, then shrugged. Xena looked back at the goddess. "Why the Hades not?" She shifted the bag she held, and something round peeked out.
'Dite blanched. "Xena! Why do you have your chakram with you?"
"Oh, this?" Xena reached into her bag and pulled out the weapon. "Catch!"
'Dite's eyes went wide as the silver circle flew toward her. Before she could zap herself out of the way, it hit her -- and bounced off, to fall to the floor as Xena and Gabrielle cackled.
"It's rubber!" Xena picked it up. "It's a prop from the show. I couldn't help bidding on it in the auction. Had to hold out against another woman, but I won it." She brandished it for a moment, giving a whisper war cry, before grinning and putting it away. "Well, we're off to get some dinner with a couple people we met. Catch you later, Aphrodite!"
'Dite could only stare as they left.
****
If you can't beat them, join them. That, at least, was Aphrodite's thoughts as she watched Harry and Mattie the next morning. It was, however, hard to join them when the general admission wrist band didn't let her in to anything other than the vendor's room and the back rows of the hall where the guests appeared. This meant she couldn't follow the two of them into the charity breakfast, and she stood outside, biting her fingernail as she watched the clones head into the same room.
A little later, the stars came through, their handlers leading them. One of the handlers didn't look happy, but she waved her party in then got on her cell phone. 'Dite could hear her talking so someone about there being only a continental breakfast instead of a full buffet, and how much money the patrons had spent to be there. She didn't seem happy when she hung up, but she only sighed quietly and stuck the phone in her pocket.
Looking up, her eyes met Aphrodite's. The goddess smiled, cursing herself for deciding to play by mortal rules and stay visible.
"How're you doin'?"
'Dite smiled. "I'm okay. How are you?"
"Eh." The woman shrugged. "I'm okay. Not happy with people, but okay." She tilted her hand. "You know, you look a lot like Alex."
"Alex?" One blond eyebrow rose, even as 'Dite had a sinking feeling.
"Yeah, Alex. She played Aphrodite in the show. Did you see those episodes?"
She had, but she wasn't going to admit it. "No, actually. I don't really look like her."
"No, you do, really." The woman sighed. "I'm Anita. Come on with me." Anita turned and walked toward the room, then glanced back to see confusion on 'Dite's face. "Come on."
Still confused, 'Dite followed.
"What's your name?"
"Uh -- Karla." She could have kicked herself, but hey, it wasn't like her friend would actually find out.
"Nice to meet you, Karla. You having a good con?"
"Yes."
"Good." Anita opened the door to the breakfast and motioned for 'Karla' to go in before her, then waved at the person who was frowning at the green wrist band. "She's with me." She led the way to a table and motioned for 'Dite to sit. "Have a seat. Enjoy yourself."
A moment later, she walked away and 'Dite looked around to find herself facing Xena, Gabrielle, Harry, and Mattie.
"Oh, Zeus."
"Oh, I don't think he's going to be here at the breakfast." Mattie helpfully handed her a schedule for the day. "But he'll be on stage at noon."
'Dite blinked. "On stage? Zeus?"
Xena laughed while Gabrielle came to her rescue. She leaned over and pointed at the schedule. "The man who played Zeus on the show. He'll be on stage with a couple of other actors."
"Oh. Right." Aphrodite looked at the schedule, then glanced at Gabrielle. "Have -- have you all introduced yourselves?" She really hoped not.
"Relax." Harry nodded. "We all know who we are. I'm Harry, but I used to be Xena, and this is Mattie who used to be Gabrielle, and this is Xena and Gabrielle, who were created by the woman who used to be Alti."
Mattie nodded, then shuddered. "Makes me wonder if there're any other evil reincarnations running around."
"Well, if there are, we'll stop them." Xena raised her glass of orange juice. "Right, Aphrodite?"
Aphrodite's mouth gaped open and she found herself completely flummoxed by the situation. "I -- I'm Karla."
The four of them stared at her.
"Riiiiiiight."
******
Deciding to just ignore the whole situation, 'Dite followed the crowd to the main hall after the breakfast. She took the same seat she had the day before, second row from the back, third chair in. As other people filled in the seats around her, she kept her gaze on the stage, steadfastly ignoring the person who brought in a bag of cheetos and crunched noisily on them cheesy treats.
Her eyebrow rose when she saw the man who'd played Zeus on the tv show and she found herself staring at him as he commanded the stage. He recited poem after poem, and it was obvious that he had prepared himself to entertain the crowd in front of him while the other two actors were expecting question and answer sessions.
"I was told this would be Q and A. Does anyone have any Q's?"
The laughter was appropriate, but the cheers mild in comparison.
'Dite couldn't help but smile, remembering Mattie's comment about other reincarnations.
After all, Zeus had always been the perfect actor.
*****
Monday came. 'Dite watched the foursome say goodbye to each other, with hugs and promises to stay in touch. She wondered if they really would.
"Will we see you again, Aphrodite?" Mattie gave her a hug. "I'd love to spend some time talking with you."
"We'll see." 'Dite hugged her back. "Feel free to call me whenever."
Harry stood behind Mattie, next to Xena. "I'm just glad you had Mattie fall in love with me again."
"Oh, that wasn't me," Aphrodite admitted," she did that all on her own."
Gabrielle hugged her as well. "We've invited Harry and Mattie for dinner in February. Can you join us?"
"I'll try. Let me know the day."
"Excellent!"
She watched as Harry and Xena shook hands.
"You take care of your girl, Harry."
"You do the same, Xe."
'Dite shook her head and wondered if the world would ever be the same.
(OOC: NFI, NFB for distance. Yeah, so, this is my version of a con report? Or something. It was a great weekend, and 'Dite will be back in Fandom late tonight.)