Man I'm in deep shit.
I got fired from target this week for reason's i will not tell anyone. I told angela only cause she guessed right away. She's been worried sick about me as of late too.
I can't seem to make sense of things lately. Angela says she loves me and i've been tryin to get her to quit smoking for 9 months at the least and she won't quit. She'll go on a one week hiatus and then start doing it again but hide it from me instead which is much worse then not telling me in the first place. I mean i can smell it. I can even taste it. Kissing Angela after she's smokes is like kissing an ashtray. Hell i'd almost prefer to kiss an ashtray.
I shouldn't care what she does though since we haven't been a couple since August but i do. She said the other day she wanted to get with some guy named Jared and i said go ahead i didn't care. Cause i know that within the first week she'll cheat on him with me. Just i don't wanna call myself angela's b/f right now. I still got a lotta problems to work out and angela needs to quit smoking and we gotta stop getting into arguements everytime we are together. I can't help the fact that i'm such an asshole. I'm not used to letting people in. I'm used to being alone. Sometimes i just wanna go back to how i was like 5 years ago. I just wanna go back to the days where i was alone and everyday when i came how from school i'd go to my room and play video games for the night. Ok maybe there are reasons why i did that so much mostly anger issues. Video games are my way to vent. I'm not a violent person, I'm not a scream at the top of your lungs at somebody in an effort to make myself feel better kinda person. I really can't explain myself. Only person who was really ever able to figure me out was Ashlee when she was around. Damn Cancers (zodiac sign not disease) They are the greatest people you'll ever meet.
I went searching for a new job yesterday with no avail. I have a strange idea that i wanna become an insurance agent. LOL. Sounds retarded but hey they make good money. Which is what i need. Just to go about doing that i don't know. Might have to ask my parents insurance agent about how to become one.
I suppose that's all i gotta say for now. Leave comments since this is my longest post in months.
I can't seem to make sense of things lately. Angela says she loves me and i've been tryin to get her to quit smoking for 9 months at the least and she won't quit. She'll go on a one week hiatus and then start doing it again but hide it from me instead which is much worse then not telling me in the first place. I mean i can smell it. I can even taste it. Kissing Angela after she's smokes is like kissing an ashtray. Hell i'd almost prefer to kiss an ashtray.
I shouldn't care what she does though since we haven't been a couple since August but i do. She said the other day she wanted to get with some guy named Jared and i said go ahead i didn't care. Cause i know that within the first week she'll cheat on him with me. Just i don't wanna call myself angela's b/f right now. I still got a lotta problems to work out and angela needs to quit smoking and we gotta stop getting into arguements everytime we are together. I can't help the fact that i'm such an asshole. I'm not used to letting people in. I'm used to being alone. Sometimes i just wanna go back to how i was like 5 years ago. I just wanna go back to the days where i was alone and everyday when i came how from school i'd go to my room and play video games for the night. Ok maybe there are reasons why i did that so much mostly anger issues. Video games are my way to vent. I'm not a violent person, I'm not a scream at the top of your lungs at somebody in an effort to make myself feel better kinda person. I really can't explain myself. Only person who was really ever able to figure me out was Ashlee when she was around. Damn Cancers (zodiac sign not disease) They are the greatest people you'll ever meet.
I went searching for a new job yesterday with no avail. I have a strange idea that i wanna become an insurance agent. LOL. Sounds retarded but hey they make good money. Which is what i need. Just to go about doing that i don't know. Might have to ask my parents insurance agent about how to become one.
I suppose that's all i gotta say for now. Leave comments since this is my longest post in months.