the new years..
I was filling out my '05 calendar and I got to June... and I almost cried... I realized that come graduation, I'll be losing a great chunk of my life- my senior friends who are graduating. I know if I talk to them about this then they'll just say things saying "don't worry, I'll still be here, I'll always be here for you," but I just can't help think "how do you know?! what if you're wrong!?"
I am scared to death to be a senior. I'm not responsible or sane enough to be one of the oldest ppl in school who all the freshies look at and say "man, I can't wait to be a senior now"... I don't want to be one of those people. Even with the load of classes I have this year, I find myself wishing it wouldn't end, wishing all the great friend's I've made wouldn't grow up and leave me behind. Why can't I just go with them? Or they stay here and wait for me.. help me get through everything.
Once again I have filched from Teal's livejournal but I really can't help it, I love the things she finds and I can't help but relate... and you have to at least give me credit for giving her credit considering I know at least one person out there is gonna ridicule me for my livejournal cleptomania...
"Being grown up isn’t half as fun as growing up: These are the best days of our lives.
The only thing that matters is just following your heart and eventually you’ll finally get it right"
I find myself looking deeper and deeper into my heart these days.. I look into my heart to find all my answers... all I can do is wait for the day when it really does show me the right way and it gives me the answer to all my problems. Until that day, I will keep following my heart and not try to change it. I will let it be no matter what and let it tell me how I should live my life but what other way should you live your life other than by your heart?