Time for my semi-annual update!
Hello my lovely LJers! I'm so glad you're all still around LJ. It's so much more personal than Facebook (most of the time). And there's no timeline :)
I'm still alive, yay! If you haven't added me on FB by now, you're welcome to. Since I'm not on LJ as much as I'd like, it'd be nice to hear from some of my old peeps, but I'm always around here even if I don't post. Here's some random updates from the past 6 months!
I FINALLY found a new job that isn't cutting hair, and isn't working with kids. While I loved working with my special needs kids, it was a heartbreak almost every day. You'd have a great day of working with the kids, teaching them that while there were many underlying issues it wasn't who they WERE, teaching them the values of communication and patience, making them understand that throwing a tantrum wouldn't get them what they wanted (or out of what they didn't want).... and the next morning you'd have to start over! The parents were harder to deal with than the kids, and at the end of the day I just felt like I wasn't helping anything, and nothing that I could do would make a difference. I know that it DID make a difference, and when I was with them we had a connection and we worked well together, but it just sucked that it was a never ending battle with their parents being enablers. It felt like we (the teachers and aides) were working harder and trying more than the parents were willing to, and then the parents felt as though we weren't doing enough because the kids went back to their ways when they got home.
So now I'm working with adults. My adults are a similar challenge to the kids, in the sense that once I leave, they tend to fall back into old habits. But I feel like I can seperate myself more because they are making the choices. It isn't their parents choosing for them. The adults I work with are all adults with a severe mental illness, and the majority of them also have issues with substance abuse. I have clients that have bi-polar or borderline personality disorder and swallow things as a coping skill, but they also are addicted to opiates. I have clients that have schizo-affective disorder and have horrible auditory and visual hallucinations, but self medicate with crack or Spice. It's intense, and every day is different. Right now I'm a case aide, which means I do a lot of welfare checks, transportation to and from doctor's appointments, skill building sessions (whether they need help with social activities, cooking/cleaning their homes, coping skills, etc), and boarding home assessments (to make sure all our clients are in safe places with food, water, plumbing, etc). I just took an amazing training called ASIST (Applied Suicide Intervention Skills Training) where I became trained in "suicide first aid" and am now considered a "suicide first responder". The class was really intense, but I learned a TON. It taught us that you won't always be able to change someone's mind about their suicidal ideations, but you always have the capability to try, and to attempt to contract for safety until you can find them a safe place. So, I love my job. I really do. It's the first time in a long time I've been really happy with my work. I've always got something to do, somewhere to go, someone to see... Even when I'm doing paperwork and documentation and notes. I really like my co-workers. I like my bosses. It's just a good place to be and it feels good.
My job has led me back to my desire to finish my education. I don't know yet how I'll get there, how I'll pay for it, or when I'll start, but this IS what I want to do with my life. I want to help people, even if it's only giving them someone to talk to. I feel (at least in my case), that even if things don't change, talking about your problems and releasing them and just having someone listen without judgement makes all the difference in the world. So, sooner rather than later I hope, I'll be going back to school for Psychology. I've got enough work experience that I'll technically qualify to apply for a case manager position in another 2 months or so, but even with the work experience I'd rather have the educational background.
Jay and I are doing well, better than we've been in a very long time. We're talking a lot more, and even more than that we're communicating with eachother. Finally. It took us almost 12 years, but we've gotten there and that's all that matters. Our 12 year anniversary is in October, and while I'm sure we won't do anything off the wall to celebrate, the celebration is in knowing that we've made it this far where most people didn't think we would. It's also in the knowing that we'll keep working, keep growing, and hopefully celebrate many many more years together.
The kiddo will be 12 this year. Scary! She's almost as tall as me, scarier still. Scariest of all, she started middle school. OMG I have a preteen. A tween? Who knows. She's a diva, she's a pain in the butt, she talks back, she doesn't listen, she's sassy as all get-out. But GOD I love my kid. She is creative, smart (although her grades don't show it), imaginative... She's a good kid :)
I'm STILL playing derby, going on 8+ years now. I'm still missing that darned PCL in my left knee (you'd think they'd do something about that, apparently I don't need it). I'm still captain of VICE, I started a "B" team called the Bandoleras (for girls who didn't have the ability, time, or money to play in A level games), and tried out for the "A" team, the SaddleTramps, last week. I made the team *yay*, so I'll get the ability to travel with the girls and compete at a national level. I'd played on the team once before, years ago, but I wasn't ready. But now... watch out! Of course, I'm no Urrk'n Jerk'n or Suzy HotRod (look them up! Urrk'n is my hero), but it's great to be able to play against girls of that caliber to learn from.
So now I've rambled, taken up a bunch of space on your f-list page (I don't remember how to cut, I'm sorry!), and I'll get off my "HEY FOLKS IM HERE" soapbox. I hope you're all doing well, and like I said... even if I don't post or comment on any kind of regular basis, I'm always here, secretly stalking you all and reading your posts!
I'm still alive, yay! If you haven't added me on FB by now, you're welcome to. Since I'm not on LJ as much as I'd like, it'd be nice to hear from some of my old peeps, but I'm always around here even if I don't post. Here's some random updates from the past 6 months!
I FINALLY found a new job that isn't cutting hair, and isn't working with kids. While I loved working with my special needs kids, it was a heartbreak almost every day. You'd have a great day of working with the kids, teaching them that while there were many underlying issues it wasn't who they WERE, teaching them the values of communication and patience, making them understand that throwing a tantrum wouldn't get them what they wanted (or out of what they didn't want).... and the next morning you'd have to start over! The parents were harder to deal with than the kids, and at the end of the day I just felt like I wasn't helping anything, and nothing that I could do would make a difference. I know that it DID make a difference, and when I was with them we had a connection and we worked well together, but it just sucked that it was a never ending battle with their parents being enablers. It felt like we (the teachers and aides) were working harder and trying more than the parents were willing to, and then the parents felt as though we weren't doing enough because the kids went back to their ways when they got home.
So now I'm working with adults. My adults are a similar challenge to the kids, in the sense that once I leave, they tend to fall back into old habits. But I feel like I can seperate myself more because they are making the choices. It isn't their parents choosing for them. The adults I work with are all adults with a severe mental illness, and the majority of them also have issues with substance abuse. I have clients that have bi-polar or borderline personality disorder and swallow things as a coping skill, but they also are addicted to opiates. I have clients that have schizo-affective disorder and have horrible auditory and visual hallucinations, but self medicate with crack or Spice. It's intense, and every day is different. Right now I'm a case aide, which means I do a lot of welfare checks, transportation to and from doctor's appointments, skill building sessions (whether they need help with social activities, cooking/cleaning their homes, coping skills, etc), and boarding home assessments (to make sure all our clients are in safe places with food, water, plumbing, etc). I just took an amazing training called ASIST (Applied Suicide Intervention Skills Training) where I became trained in "suicide first aid" and am now considered a "suicide first responder". The class was really intense, but I learned a TON. It taught us that you won't always be able to change someone's mind about their suicidal ideations, but you always have the capability to try, and to attempt to contract for safety until you can find them a safe place. So, I love my job. I really do. It's the first time in a long time I've been really happy with my work. I've always got something to do, somewhere to go, someone to see... Even when I'm doing paperwork and documentation and notes. I really like my co-workers. I like my bosses. It's just a good place to be and it feels good.
My job has led me back to my desire to finish my education. I don't know yet how I'll get there, how I'll pay for it, or when I'll start, but this IS what I want to do with my life. I want to help people, even if it's only giving them someone to talk to. I feel (at least in my case), that even if things don't change, talking about your problems and releasing them and just having someone listen without judgement makes all the difference in the world. So, sooner rather than later I hope, I'll be going back to school for Psychology. I've got enough work experience that I'll technically qualify to apply for a case manager position in another 2 months or so, but even with the work experience I'd rather have the educational background.
Jay and I are doing well, better than we've been in a very long time. We're talking a lot more, and even more than that we're communicating with eachother. Finally. It took us almost 12 years, but we've gotten there and that's all that matters. Our 12 year anniversary is in October, and while I'm sure we won't do anything off the wall to celebrate, the celebration is in knowing that we've made it this far where most people didn't think we would. It's also in the knowing that we'll keep working, keep growing, and hopefully celebrate many many more years together.
The kiddo will be 12 this year. Scary! She's almost as tall as me, scarier still. Scariest of all, she started middle school. OMG I have a preteen. A tween? Who knows. She's a diva, she's a pain in the butt, she talks back, she doesn't listen, she's sassy as all get-out. But GOD I love my kid. She is creative, smart (although her grades don't show it), imaginative... She's a good kid :)
I'm STILL playing derby, going on 8+ years now. I'm still missing that darned PCL in my left knee (you'd think they'd do something about that, apparently I don't need it). I'm still captain of VICE, I started a "B" team called the Bandoleras (for girls who didn't have the ability, time, or money to play in A level games), and tried out for the "A" team, the SaddleTramps, last week. I made the team *yay*, so I'll get the ability to travel with the girls and compete at a national level. I'd played on the team once before, years ago, but I wasn't ready. But now... watch out! Of course, I'm no Urrk'n Jerk'n or Suzy HotRod (look them up! Urrk'n is my hero), but it's great to be able to play against girls of that caliber to learn from.
So now I've rambled, taken up a bunch of space on your f-list page (I don't remember how to cut, I'm sorry!), and I'll get off my "HEY FOLKS IM HERE" soapbox. I hope you're all doing well, and like I said... even if I don't post or comment on any kind of regular basis, I'm always here, secretly stalking you all and reading your posts!