i hate this!
i hate this! i cant wait until these stupid 3 monthes are over and marc is back here in california. i am too stressed out with him gone. im too fucking sensitive and i hate it! if he doesnt call me i get all sad and paranoid cuz im fucking retarded! and i havent talked to him in like forever, ( forever not even being that long by the way, im just super sensitve!) i just wanna feel normal again! completely normal im sick and tired of missing him! i just want to be with him so i can be completely happy and normal again. im not miserable but everythings different and i am super sensitive i cant stand this! its too long! gosh darn it! i feel all weird! like if i talk about " my boyfriend" it feels weird cuz i havent seen him in so long! i have a boyfriend i dont see! im tired of this! i just want him back! i cant stand this anymore! its just getting to me! im not sad im not lonley im PISSED off and impatient! i want things back the way they were! and its taking to long to get back that way! i dont wanna wait anymore!and why the fuck hasnt he called me! ( see thats an example if how im getting cuz he has been gone so long) im all onry and aggrivated with my whole situation. time sint going by fast enough for me. i miss him too gosh damn much for this shit! i cant even explain im just sick and tired of him being gone! i hate this waiting crap!its stupid! STUPID!! it needs to hurry up and be march 4 already! UGH! im just so frustrated! and i dont even know exactly why! i have a none stop feeling of frustration and aggrivation i only know is caused by him being gone there is no specific event or reason for this frustration! so why is it here! why cant i just be sad and mopey like before!ya know! like ugh! i cant wait until i just fucking go to florida. then ill be normal again! just normal, fun happy, not frustrated, not sad dawn. cuz they dawn i am now is CRAP!ok im gonna go.