think think think
well, things are going a lot better for joey which makes me feel a kazillion times better. and we've become closer too which is good. like i dunno sometimes i worry that he is distancing from me and now we're closer then ever. he is total clean from everything, except beer and cigarettes which he has cut back on a lot. but compared to some of the other things he was doing those are nothing. he doesnt even smoke bud anymore. Joey, doesnt smoke weed. i never ever thought id be able to say that. but i can and its a good thing to be able to say. and he never ever ever ever will do tweek again, that was a hard thing for him, but he did it. he is such a great person and im really proud of him. to see him change as much has he has in the last like 3 weeks, makes me wonder if i could ever change the way he has.ok last night him and i went with jill and my friend sara to this party, but not a regular party there was no drugs or alcohol at all it was people from the church and bible study jill goes to and joey and i went with her. and well we had fun and everyone was so nice and eventually we got to talkin to this guy, Dave hes a paster and at first he was talking to joey about religion and i was inside dancing, then i got tired of dacing and went outside to visit them and got in there convo. and like joey was saying how much he has changed and he doesnt even know how he did it. and it was a BIG change, i mean he was literally dying, wasting away and he saved himself. and i dont think i could ever do that, cuz look at me, i smoke weed, and i cant even stop that. i try to all the time, i can cut back and not do it as much, but i dont know how to stop completely, and look at joey, how many drugs and stuff was he doing one inparticular was a hell of a lot harded to stop then weed and he did it, literally over night.it just makes me think, cuz i've always looked up to joey, like in my eyes he never did any wrong, he has done some things to make me worry about him, but when everyone else would say "joeys a tweeker" or "joeys a druggy" or or any of the other negative things people would tell me, i would always get so mad, like to the point of crying, cuz those things werent true they just werent, and now to here basically those same thing from joey saying he was those things, i dunno it just makes me think.i really need to do some changing, i just dont know how to, yet.ill figure it out though sooner or later. well im gonna go now.