(no subject)
today was non stop thinking. and it wasnt good thinking. it wasnt thinking that had anything to do with school. it was a thinking that just made me feel worse about everything. and it was a thinking that hurt. it hurts to know how much you like someone.... i mean really like. not the fucking oh i like you lets go out and its over in 2 weeks when another hot one comes along. its different. i cant explain how i feel because its impossible. i know how i feel but it just cant be explained. and it hurts worse to know that with how much you like them and have to watch them look past you and go with someone else, not just once but possibly twice. and then to tell yourself.... why cant he see what other people see.... why cant he see what he has in front of him. now there are two questions that wont be answered.... ever. i wish that i could explain how good be makes me feel. how good it feel to be with him. how good it feels to wouch him. how good it feels to lay with him. how good it feels when he holds me. how much everything makes me feel so much better about everything else that is bad in my life right now. it is no good to just sit here and think about this particular subject but it just wont go away.. someone make it go away.
will is going through some problems with him life as well. the center of his is a little bifferent then mine but that doesnt really matter. i really hope that he feels better about life and everything that is going on around him soon.
i got a job at sub base. then i think that i might still go to the interview and see about that office job at corey indestries.
life just rally has not been worth anything latly to tell you the truth.... maybe the so called GOD just hates me if he is really there. maybe he is making it a point to fuck up my life as much as possible. to make sure that i dont get what i want. to make sure that nothing works out for me. whatever.
will is going through some problems with him life as well. the center of his is a little bifferent then mine but that doesnt really matter. i really hope that he feels better about life and everything that is going on around him soon.
i got a job at sub base. then i think that i might still go to the interview and see about that office job at corey indestries.
life just rally has not been worth anything latly to tell you the truth.... maybe the so called GOD just hates me if he is really there. maybe he is making it a point to fuck up my life as much as possible. to make sure that i dont get what i want. to make sure that nothing works out for me. whatever.