no matter how hard i try i don't know why you push so far away

[disturbed15911]

i dont give a fuck anymore who sees this...yes MAGGIE, I FUCKING LOVE THIS GIRL, she doesnt seem to understand that im miserable or she just wants to ignor it, ITS LIKE EVERYDAY EVERYONE IS SHOVELING SOME FUCKING SHIT IN MY FACE TO GET ME DOWN AND I CANT TAKE IT ANYMORE i would die for this girl...i would do anything for her and...she just goes on like....idk she confuses me i dont want to be just another number in a fucking line that she makes for herself im not no fucking sheep to be herded i cant stand that...she did it twice to me today....like ran over to who the hell knows rapper people I FUCKING HATE THEM MORE AND MORE EACH DAY AT MY SCHOOL I WANT TO LEAVE!!!!!!!!!!
i would fucking lets her slit my wrists without thinking too:-/its sad i know...but what can i say

i let myself fall into a lie
i let my walls come down
i let myself smile and feel alive
i let my walls come down
no matter how i try i don't know why
you push so far away
you wrapped your hands tight around my heart
and squeezed it full of pain

with this knife i'll cut out the part of me
the part that cares for you
with this knife i'll cut out the heart of me
the heart that cares for you

i can't believe the way you took me down
i never saw the pain
coming in a million broken miles
like poison from my veins

with this knife i'll cut out the part of me
the part that cares for you
with this knife i'll cut out the heart of me
the heart that cares for you
with this knife i'll cut out the part of me
the part that cares for you
with this knife i'll cut out the heart of me
the heart that cares for you

the hate and the fear,
the nightmares that wake
me up in tears.
the nightmares and the hate,
and the fear
the nightmares that wake,
me up in tears.
the nightmares and the hate,
and the fear
the nightmare that wake
me up in tears
the nightmare and the hate