(no subject)
And All That Could Have Been, by NIN is the most beatiful song that i have ever heard in my life. it's so wonderful. aaah... it's soo beautiful.
anyway. i talked to justin!... i'm so happy!... hell yes. it is wonderful. he is wonderful.
today was kind of shitty. but not over all. i got cracked on by someone, and laughed at by like 5 guys in my 4th period... that's always fucking nice. god damn fucking bastards. i hate snider. snider should die. he said... "i knew you would end up like that"... i said.. "like what?"... he said... "all marilyn manson and shit".. then i jsut looked away, as aaaaalll those guys just sat and fucking laughed. and felt stupid as a mother fucker. i wish i would have said something. what he said doesn't bother me... but the fact that they all thought it was sooo fucking funny..god damn. they are fucking pathetic. it was aaall about my clothes. how i fucking choose to dress... what the hell concern is it of theres? none at all. fuck them. fuck there immaturity, fuck there blindness, fuck there pitiful thoughts, fuck there "popularity", fuck them. ugh.
yes. anyway. i will not spend anymore time thinking of them.
i saw this girl ashely sizemore today. i used to be best freinds w/ her in elementary school. then when middle school rolled around, she was gone... she told me today, that she ended up moving to georgia, and now she's back. it was soooo cool talking to her. it was awesome. it was very strange how we figured out how we knew each other. it was funny. man.
yah. and theres this girl in my 4th period good vs. evil class. she is really really cool. i sit right next to her. she's very fun to talk and laugh w/. yah.
i came home from school. and my cousin cassie was here. so i talked to her for a little bit. that was pretty nice. b/c i usually don't talk to her. but the shitty thing is that she only talks to me if it's just me and her. if there is anyone else in our family, or her b/f around,t hen it's like she doesn't even know me. kinda makes me feel like a worthless peice of shit. ah well. it was still kinda nice, i soppose.
mmm... then. i ate dinner and had a very long talk w/ my mom. it was beautiful. we talked about waht those guys did to me today, and she says that she would have noo problem transfering schools for me. i think i would like that alot. but i know cassie would probly get mad. and plus i would miss all my freinds a hell of alot. so i think i'll put up w/ this shit. it makes me feel like shit, sometimes, but overall i think that it makes me a better person. we also talked about school. i told her all about how middle school was for me. it was shit. it was fucking horrible... i am sooo fucking glad that that shit is fucking over. then she told me about her school years. it was just incredibly beautiful, and nice. i enjoy those talks w/ my mom. she always makes me feel sane. she makes me feel better. always. i'm lucky to have her. i know she isn't perfect. and i always talk bad about in this journal. but she really is a good person, at heart. she's made plenty of mistakes. who that fuck hasn't? but she's my mother, and i love her so much.
i'm soppose to be going to the firefly w/ marcie tonight. tess works from 7-11. so we're getting a ride w/ her, then we're just going to walk home later. i hope to whoever or whatever the hell controls this earth, that it is still raining when we come home. because that would be beautiful.
mmm.. i don't think that mike had the chance to break into our house again, today... his fucking van broke down.. aaaaahahahahahahahah. stupid fucking cocksucker.
he told my sister... "suck me, bitch".. last night on the fucking phone. he's 26 years old. i can't believe how fucking immature he really is. it's sad.... alcohol does that to ya, tho. whatever age you start drinking, and how ever far your maturity has come along, that's were it stay until you quit... crazy.. eh? yep... this is definetly the case w/ mike. ugh. i can't stand the sound of his god damn name. i'm not going to say it anymore.
well. that's all i have to say, for now. so i will go now.
good day.
anyway. i talked to justin!... i'm so happy!... hell yes. it is wonderful. he is wonderful.
today was kind of shitty. but not over all. i got cracked on by someone, and laughed at by like 5 guys in my 4th period... that's always fucking nice. god damn fucking bastards. i hate snider. snider should die. he said... "i knew you would end up like that"... i said.. "like what?"... he said... "all marilyn manson and shit".. then i jsut looked away, as aaaaalll those guys just sat and fucking laughed. and felt stupid as a mother fucker. i wish i would have said something. what he said doesn't bother me... but the fact that they all thought it was sooo fucking funny..god damn. they are fucking pathetic. it was aaall about my clothes. how i fucking choose to dress... what the hell concern is it of theres? none at all. fuck them. fuck there immaturity, fuck there blindness, fuck there pitiful thoughts, fuck there "popularity", fuck them. ugh.
yes. anyway. i will not spend anymore time thinking of them.
i saw this girl ashely sizemore today. i used to be best freinds w/ her in elementary school. then when middle school rolled around, she was gone... she told me today, that she ended up moving to georgia, and now she's back. it was soooo cool talking to her. it was awesome. it was very strange how we figured out how we knew each other. it was funny. man.
yah. and theres this girl in my 4th period good vs. evil class. she is really really cool. i sit right next to her. she's very fun to talk and laugh w/. yah.
i came home from school. and my cousin cassie was here. so i talked to her for a little bit. that was pretty nice. b/c i usually don't talk to her. but the shitty thing is that she only talks to me if it's just me and her. if there is anyone else in our family, or her b/f around,t hen it's like she doesn't even know me. kinda makes me feel like a worthless peice of shit. ah well. it was still kinda nice, i soppose.
mmm... then. i ate dinner and had a very long talk w/ my mom. it was beautiful. we talked about waht those guys did to me today, and she says that she would have noo problem transfering schools for me. i think i would like that alot. but i know cassie would probly get mad. and plus i would miss all my freinds a hell of alot. so i think i'll put up w/ this shit. it makes me feel like shit, sometimes, but overall i think that it makes me a better person. we also talked about school. i told her all about how middle school was for me. it was shit. it was fucking horrible... i am sooo fucking glad that that shit is fucking over. then she told me about her school years. it was just incredibly beautiful, and nice. i enjoy those talks w/ my mom. she always makes me feel sane. she makes me feel better. always. i'm lucky to have her. i know she isn't perfect. and i always talk bad about in this journal. but she really is a good person, at heart. she's made plenty of mistakes. who that fuck hasn't? but she's my mother, and i love her so much.
i'm soppose to be going to the firefly w/ marcie tonight. tess works from 7-11. so we're getting a ride w/ her, then we're just going to walk home later. i hope to whoever or whatever the hell controls this earth, that it is still raining when we come home. because that would be beautiful.
mmm.. i don't think that mike had the chance to break into our house again, today... his fucking van broke down.. aaaaahahahahahahahah. stupid fucking cocksucker.
he told my sister... "suck me, bitch".. last night on the fucking phone. he's 26 years old. i can't believe how fucking immature he really is. it's sad.... alcohol does that to ya, tho. whatever age you start drinking, and how ever far your maturity has come along, that's were it stay until you quit... crazy.. eh? yep... this is definetly the case w/ mike. ugh. i can't stand the sound of his god damn name. i'm not going to say it anymore.
well. that's all i have to say, for now. so i will go now.
good day.