(no subject)
group was intense today. extremely. wow.
i have to tell both of parents that i have still been cutting. i told my mom on the way home from the hospital. i lied to both my parents... my dad just asked me if i have, and i said that i haven't since i got out of the hospital the second time. god. how dumb am i? i just thought that if no one knew then it would be easier for me to just deal with it. b/c i don't need everybody's worrying, and disappointment to think about.
god damn man.
i hadn't done it for like 2 weeks. then i just realized... why am still trying? my efforts aren't doing jack fucking shit. when i told deb that, she said that maybe i need to go to inpatient. fuck that fucking shit man. it hasn't done jackshit for me in the past. so fuck it.
i don't know anymore. i guess never knew.
i have to tell both of parents that i have still been cutting. i told my mom on the way home from the hospital. i lied to both my parents... my dad just asked me if i have, and i said that i haven't since i got out of the hospital the second time. god. how dumb am i? i just thought that if no one knew then it would be easier for me to just deal with it. b/c i don't need everybody's worrying, and disappointment to think about.
god damn man.
i hadn't done it for like 2 weeks. then i just realized... why am still trying? my efforts aren't doing jack fucking shit. when i told deb that, she said that maybe i need to go to inpatient. fuck that fucking shit man. it hasn't done jackshit for me in the past. so fuck it.
i don't know anymore. i guess never knew.