wow, an update
so yea, sorry livejournal its not that i detest you or anything its just i kinda forgot about you. i cheaten on you with myspace for a while.
as of now, im a veterinary assistant at central animal hospital here in savannah. i like it. i get to do what i want to do and team is pretty cool. now, dont get me wrong...some i'd love to stab in the twat a time or two but, i'll get over it. im in college now too, online of couse. nowhere in the southeast of georgia offers classes to get your degree as a veterinary technician. thank you Penn Foster. its all acredited even to all the vet schools across america. i dont plan to go to school to be a vet...i'd like to do the fun stuff. xrays, drawing blood, giving medications...thats sort of stuff.
um, relationship wise iam single. matthew and i broke up in september...march would have been 3 years. we still live together. people are shocked and ask how i do it...heh, first thing to know about me is that iam not everyone. at first i'd sucked ass and i was a girl about it. now, it rocks! honestly, i dont think i want to do the whole relationship shit anymore. im done. im 24 years old. ive had my fun. i dont think im going to live that long and honestly the way im living my life right now i highly doubt i will. i live in pain pills that eat away at my stomach. i think its about 5 years worth of narcotic pain pill taking then your liver fails, kidney fails, and bye bye. hey, you gotta a better option for me. i still live in chronic pain with my back. people ask me if im in a bad mood...no, its just easier to not talk than to cry and complain that you hurt all the time. no one understands that...huritng all the time. you mean you hurt like 24 hours a day. yes, asshole i hurt always to the point where iam always having such neausua. i dont like to eat because of it then the pain starts because i have nothing in my stomach. i use to be the queen of sleep and now iam the queen of insomnia. if you missed what im talking about. in 05' i got in a car accident and now i have 3 slipped disks and spondylosis throughout my whole back. i heard i have the back of a 85 years old. court case is still pending. i have no insurance either so im pretty broke all t he time buying medication. my mom helps me out though.
my life is much different than it use to be. i dont go anywhere anymore unless matt dusts me off and makes me. to be honest i use to have tons of friends here. the more i moved the less i came back too. sometimes i dont blame them and sometimes i do. do i hate savannah...yes. do i plan to leave again when i have the money and an opportunity...yes. some people say that where they were born is home to them...to me its not. here feels like a hotel room and i live out of suit cases. hah, you think i lie. most of my shit is still in boxes and i moved back home a year ago. its because i dont want to back it all back up again. this place bores the fuck out of me. as of relationships ive had certain friends for years. when i say years i mean like 9 years. one that was basically my blood is too busy for me. i dont think dear friend is that busy. i think too busy for my shit. why get use to me being around for me to dip out again? or that i disrupt the relationship between he and his girlfriend. though, i never was out to do such a thing. i think im an abrasive person and most people dont mesh well with me. im loud and obnoxious at times and i pretend to have a big ego because to me its funny. some dont get my dark humor. maybe dear girlfriend is just protecting whats hers. protecting her man from getting hurt. i can respect that. it'd just be nice to know why i faded away though i tried to establish contact all the time. its not like you didnt know where to find me.
the other situation was a friend for about the same amount of time with on and offs. she was not doing a good job showing that she wasnt cheating on her man who was a friend of mine as well. did she cheat? i dont know. if she went to court with evidence she would be found guilty. her boyfriend cried to me everyday how his heart was breaking. how do i make her love me agan? that sir, i have no idea. it breaks you down hearing a man pour his heart out about his love and she ignores him. he finds a book of hers with lyrics that she wrote. he reads it to others on the phone. he doesnt put it back and she finds that he read it. he blames it on me. he calls me and begs me to take the blame because she would yell at him. her not knowing that he spied on her much worse than this book. this book was nothing compaired to how far he went to find out her where-abouts. i said id take the blame but, he'd have to be honest with her. at that moment her friendship with me was finished because i was a trator. he i thought would still be my friends. for all i did for him. doing over to where he was and checking on him all the time. making sure he was okay. surely he would stand behind me after i did so much for him. ...nope. apparently his spine wasnt at strong as i thought. turns out he didnt have one at all. to stand up to her and say that his heart was breaking and for her to stay home. he was so sure if he gave her all that she'd give just a little. i havent talked to either of these couples in months. my cell number hasnt changed. my workplace hasnt changed locations, nor has my street adress. you knew where to find me but, you wiped me out. as of now, i dont exist in their lives...if i do im a parasite sucking up the fun.
i dunno anymore. its funny remebering living in orlando. matt and i living off romen noodles and tortinos pizzas. it was a good week if we could afford walmart soda. washing our clothes in our bathtub because we couldnt afford the laundry mat. working at petco with lots of people out of fuck me over. yet, i was so much happier. i have a good job, a nice house, i can afford shit now, ive got more space for my pets and now i have more pets, and iam not happy. im just not happy anymore. maybe its because i ran out of lexapro and i cant afford $100 for pills a month. i dont know.
as of now, im a veterinary assistant at central animal hospital here in savannah. i like it. i get to do what i want to do and team is pretty cool. now, dont get me wrong...some i'd love to stab in the twat a time or two but, i'll get over it. im in college now too, online of couse. nowhere in the southeast of georgia offers classes to get your degree as a veterinary technician. thank you Penn Foster. its all acredited even to all the vet schools across america. i dont plan to go to school to be a vet...i'd like to do the fun stuff. xrays, drawing blood, giving medications...thats sort of stuff.
um, relationship wise iam single. matthew and i broke up in september...march would have been 3 years. we still live together. people are shocked and ask how i do it...heh, first thing to know about me is that iam not everyone. at first i'd sucked ass and i was a girl about it. now, it rocks! honestly, i dont think i want to do the whole relationship shit anymore. im done. im 24 years old. ive had my fun. i dont think im going to live that long and honestly the way im living my life right now i highly doubt i will. i live in pain pills that eat away at my stomach. i think its about 5 years worth of narcotic pain pill taking then your liver fails, kidney fails, and bye bye. hey, you gotta a better option for me. i still live in chronic pain with my back. people ask me if im in a bad mood...no, its just easier to not talk than to cry and complain that you hurt all the time. no one understands that...huritng all the time. you mean you hurt like 24 hours a day. yes, asshole i hurt always to the point where iam always having such neausua. i dont like to eat because of it then the pain starts because i have nothing in my stomach. i use to be the queen of sleep and now iam the queen of insomnia. if you missed what im talking about. in 05' i got in a car accident and now i have 3 slipped disks and spondylosis throughout my whole back. i heard i have the back of a 85 years old. court case is still pending. i have no insurance either so im pretty broke all t he time buying medication. my mom helps me out though.
my life is much different than it use to be. i dont go anywhere anymore unless matt dusts me off and makes me. to be honest i use to have tons of friends here. the more i moved the less i came back too. sometimes i dont blame them and sometimes i do. do i hate savannah...yes. do i plan to leave again when i have the money and an opportunity...yes. some people say that where they were born is home to them...to me its not. here feels like a hotel room and i live out of suit cases. hah, you think i lie. most of my shit is still in boxes and i moved back home a year ago. its because i dont want to back it all back up again. this place bores the fuck out of me. as of relationships ive had certain friends for years. when i say years i mean like 9 years. one that was basically my blood is too busy for me. i dont think dear friend is that busy. i think too busy for my shit. why get use to me being around for me to dip out again? or that i disrupt the relationship between he and his girlfriend. though, i never was out to do such a thing. i think im an abrasive person and most people dont mesh well with me. im loud and obnoxious at times and i pretend to have a big ego because to me its funny. some dont get my dark humor. maybe dear girlfriend is just protecting whats hers. protecting her man from getting hurt. i can respect that. it'd just be nice to know why i faded away though i tried to establish contact all the time. its not like you didnt know where to find me.
the other situation was a friend for about the same amount of time with on and offs. she was not doing a good job showing that she wasnt cheating on her man who was a friend of mine as well. did she cheat? i dont know. if she went to court with evidence she would be found guilty. her boyfriend cried to me everyday how his heart was breaking. how do i make her love me agan? that sir, i have no idea. it breaks you down hearing a man pour his heart out about his love and she ignores him. he finds a book of hers with lyrics that she wrote. he reads it to others on the phone. he doesnt put it back and she finds that he read it. he blames it on me. he calls me and begs me to take the blame because she would yell at him. her not knowing that he spied on her much worse than this book. this book was nothing compaired to how far he went to find out her where-abouts. i said id take the blame but, he'd have to be honest with her. at that moment her friendship with me was finished because i was a trator. he i thought would still be my friends. for all i did for him. doing over to where he was and checking on him all the time. making sure he was okay. surely he would stand behind me after i did so much for him. ...nope. apparently his spine wasnt at strong as i thought. turns out he didnt have one at all. to stand up to her and say that his heart was breaking and for her to stay home. he was so sure if he gave her all that she'd give just a little. i havent talked to either of these couples in months. my cell number hasnt changed. my workplace hasnt changed locations, nor has my street adress. you knew where to find me but, you wiped me out. as of now, i dont exist in their lives...if i do im a parasite sucking up the fun.
i dunno anymore. its funny remebering living in orlando. matt and i living off romen noodles and tortinos pizzas. it was a good week if we could afford walmart soda. washing our clothes in our bathtub because we couldnt afford the laundry mat. working at petco with lots of people out of fuck me over. yet, i was so much happier. i have a good job, a nice house, i can afford shit now, ive got more space for my pets and now i have more pets, and iam not happy. im just not happy anymore. maybe its because i ran out of lexapro and i cant afford $100 for pills a month. i dont know.