an ongoing trend
it seems like everytime im happy, i suddenly become horribly disappointed. and im a very unhappy person. i write about this stuff all the time. like i feel like things are going good. but then in the next entry, im deeply hurt. i hate this so much. i just wantt to have the oppurtunity to make something permanantly happy in my life. something i can hold onto and remember when im upset. but right now, i have nothing. i have no one. its even hard to talk to my besy friend. i cant be honest with anyone. i feel like they dont understand.