Vocation Direction
Month #8 in Austin Texas. I've got a wonderful companion, a job that pays for groceries & the rent, a home to call my own, and some cash cushion in the bank so I can afford to take care of small emergencies or attend to general maintenance concerns within a timely manner. The work I do now however is breeding a complacent misery in my soul and I need something better for both the long-term and the relatively soon.
Most "major" concerns are again on hiatus for a good chunk of the year. The now-required health insurance will not effect ramifications until October, and my student loans are on ice until December. I want to be in a different line of work, I want to be doing something that makes better use of >me<, and I want to be better compensated for the time and energy I put into the world. I also want to pursue my creative passions where'er they draw me, but that is an ongoing part of my spirit I'm learning better to regulate.
So the question lies at Where Best Should I Direct Myself - to a different job with somewhat better benefits that may or may not be professionally where I want to be in five years, or to focus now on the career that I want to have on a longer term basis. And as with similar such postulations, I turn to the Tarot for meditation.
The Job I Have: The Emperor
Highly, highly appropriate. I work for a corporation that works for larger corporations. Structure and indomitability defines this place despite the veneer of youth and casual coherence.
The Job I Want: Lust
Leo. Lust. Something I put my passion fully into and am recognized for it. Again, quite appropriate.
Myself In The Situation: Prince of Cups
The Thinking Dreamer. Odd that this is not only the only water card in the spread but that I generally don't associate the water cards with myself. There is the air aspect here though, and I do agree that my creative soul yearns for greater fulfillment now that I have settled and developed a bit of a foundation here in Austin.
Mural Project: Four of Coins
The Lord of Power; Sun in Capricorn in Chesed. I recognize that I'm effectively in control of this situation and will soon be able to ice this until the client further commits to the work. I'm not spending three months of my off-time dicking over inefficient methods - I'm done with that. I'll collect the information I need, test the methods I have at hand, and run the reality by my client. They'll either pay for the masks to be cut by laser or they'll pay me to do it myself. Either way if the mural is to be finished this year they'll have to commit to the material, and once the costs are determined it's off of my project board.
Con Volunteering Projects: Seven of Staves
The Lord of Excess; Mars in Leo in Netzach. Unbalanced will; putting a lot of showy effort towards illusionary gains. I've already committed to the February convention, but from what I learned at the last show this group only deals with a few of these shows and it seems that what T____ does is only a different evolution of volunteering - not a profession. Yes there's the exercise of will and adopting a mantle of generic authority for the time of the event, and the vainity of rubbing elbows with nerdcore celebrities, but it seems a blunt end unto itself. On the plus side I'm not required to prepare for these events, but I might not get the best bang for my buck in the long run. No, I don't see myself sticking with these groups for the long run, but I might not get as much from volunteering here as I might like.
Chalking Projects: Eight of Staves
The Lord of Swiftness; Mercury in Sagittarius in Hod. Mercury in Mercury's eternal loop spinning endlessly, mindlessly spinning. I need to commit to that project one way or the other anmd get back to M_____ soon.
Teaching Projects: Ten of Staves
The Lord of Oppression; Saturn in Sagittarius in Malkuth. Conservation and restriction in the outward journey. Preparing for A-kon will be a lot of work as it's a part of myself I don't feel connected with anymore; moreso now that I've moved away from leathercrafting. It is a vanity project I've committed to, and it requires an investment, and the compensatory gains will be minimal - more feeding into the act itself than building a monetary base. I'll put myself through a lot of stress like I have before for something that may not return the capital gains my life demands.
Current Advice: Ten of Coins
The Lord of Overabundance; Mercury in Virgo in Malkuth. Inert wealth and squander. For the first time in years I'm stable enough, but it's a tenuous foundation. Regardless of all other connections I recognize that the time for indulging my passions from the insurance windfall has come into a more measured space. I've picked up a few material delights along the way but should be more wary of my accountable wealth before I find myself in the desparate hand-to-mouth situation of years recently passed. More importantly, this may be seen as referring to Time - my time - and what I do with it. I recognize it as the greatly mutable wealth of my life right now as the job certainly isn't compensating well, and lately I've been indulging my desires to be with J____, to spend my evenings gaming, watching shows, hunt for sex, sleep in, or other vanity-related things. Certain activities should be engaged in - All Work and No Play and all that jazz - and my relationship with J____ is a blessed thing. Some of the other bits though can be and should be toned back though gods forbid they be regulated - the last thing I need is to jerk off by creating another system to organize myself which becomes forgotten in five weeks' time.
My own card in this situation is the only court card that appears. The jobs are the only Major Arcana. The current project is the only material one while the others are all passions. From an oracle deck were drawn "Fire" as my greatest asset in attaining my desired job, and "The Ship" was drawn as my greatest adversary. Letting things glide will result in my sticking with the current, unsatisfying vocation and only action will move me on to where I want to be. However the Lord of Overabundance cautions me against squandering my time in old, inefficient pursuits that do not relate to the ideal career. Something must be done to move past inefficient habits. Choose what diversions are most important and restrict all else that does not contribute to vocational advancement.
While I have the switchboard job I have reliable income, a place to stay, the means to feed myself, and some time to relax. I will enjoy my time with J____ regardless of what we do.
With my current lineup of Projects and Events there is uncertainty other than the commmitment of much time and energy for the means of survival for only a limited time - which is not to say the current job is reliable.
I will say No to FWO.
I will say No to NTIF.
I will say No to Akon.
I will stay committed to OPIX for this next event, but only because it is a short thing requiring minimal preparation on my part, and I'll be able to help out a friend in the interim. I will take the other OPIX events by ear.
I will stay committed to the Mural but only until I can legitimately put it on ice until the client further commits to the degree I have, or decides to go a different route with it.
I will redirect my focus to building inroads with professional Meeting, Event, and Convention Planners. I will volunteer my creative free time to them in order to better build and grow my resume, my experience and skill sets, my network, and land a vocation that permits me to live a life where I feel the act of fulfillment in my work, can take care of myself fully, pay old debts, and still have time for special bonding with my loved ones.
Most "major" concerns are again on hiatus for a good chunk of the year. The now-required health insurance will not effect ramifications until October, and my student loans are on ice until December. I want to be in a different line of work, I want to be doing something that makes better use of >me<, and I want to be better compensated for the time and energy I put into the world. I also want to pursue my creative passions where'er they draw me, but that is an ongoing part of my spirit I'm learning better to regulate.
So the question lies at Where Best Should I Direct Myself - to a different job with somewhat better benefits that may or may not be professionally where I want to be in five years, or to focus now on the career that I want to have on a longer term basis. And as with similar such postulations, I turn to the Tarot for meditation.
The Job I Have: The Emperor
Highly, highly appropriate. I work for a corporation that works for larger corporations. Structure and indomitability defines this place despite the veneer of youth and casual coherence.
The Job I Want: Lust
Leo. Lust. Something I put my passion fully into and am recognized for it. Again, quite appropriate.
Myself In The Situation: Prince of Cups
The Thinking Dreamer. Odd that this is not only the only water card in the spread but that I generally don't associate the water cards with myself. There is the air aspect here though, and I do agree that my creative soul yearns for greater fulfillment now that I have settled and developed a bit of a foundation here in Austin.
Mural Project: Four of Coins
The Lord of Power; Sun in Capricorn in Chesed. I recognize that I'm effectively in control of this situation and will soon be able to ice this until the client further commits to the work. I'm not spending three months of my off-time dicking over inefficient methods - I'm done with that. I'll collect the information I need, test the methods I have at hand, and run the reality by my client. They'll either pay for the masks to be cut by laser or they'll pay me to do it myself. Either way if the mural is to be finished this year they'll have to commit to the material, and once the costs are determined it's off of my project board.
Con Volunteering Projects: Seven of Staves
The Lord of Excess; Mars in Leo in Netzach. Unbalanced will; putting a lot of showy effort towards illusionary gains. I've already committed to the February convention, but from what I learned at the last show this group only deals with a few of these shows and it seems that what T____ does is only a different evolution of volunteering - not a profession. Yes there's the exercise of will and adopting a mantle of generic authority for the time of the event, and the vainity of rubbing elbows with nerdcore celebrities, but it seems a blunt end unto itself. On the plus side I'm not required to prepare for these events, but I might not get the best bang for my buck in the long run. No, I don't see myself sticking with these groups for the long run, but I might not get as much from volunteering here as I might like.
Chalking Projects: Eight of Staves
The Lord of Swiftness; Mercury in Sagittarius in Hod. Mercury in Mercury's eternal loop spinning endlessly, mindlessly spinning. I need to commit to that project one way or the other anmd get back to M_____ soon.
Teaching Projects: Ten of Staves
The Lord of Oppression; Saturn in Sagittarius in Malkuth. Conservation and restriction in the outward journey. Preparing for A-kon will be a lot of work as it's a part of myself I don't feel connected with anymore; moreso now that I've moved away from leathercrafting. It is a vanity project I've committed to, and it requires an investment, and the compensatory gains will be minimal - more feeding into the act itself than building a monetary base. I'll put myself through a lot of stress like I have before for something that may not return the capital gains my life demands.
Current Advice: Ten of Coins
The Lord of Overabundance; Mercury in Virgo in Malkuth. Inert wealth and squander. For the first time in years I'm stable enough, but it's a tenuous foundation. Regardless of all other connections I recognize that the time for indulging my passions from the insurance windfall has come into a more measured space. I've picked up a few material delights along the way but should be more wary of my accountable wealth before I find myself in the desparate hand-to-mouth situation of years recently passed. More importantly, this may be seen as referring to Time - my time - and what I do with it. I recognize it as the greatly mutable wealth of my life right now as the job certainly isn't compensating well, and lately I've been indulging my desires to be with J____, to spend my evenings gaming, watching shows, hunt for sex, sleep in, or other vanity-related things. Certain activities should be engaged in - All Work and No Play and all that jazz - and my relationship with J____ is a blessed thing. Some of the other bits though can be and should be toned back though gods forbid they be regulated - the last thing I need is to jerk off by creating another system to organize myself which becomes forgotten in five weeks' time.
My own card in this situation is the only court card that appears. The jobs are the only Major Arcana. The current project is the only material one while the others are all passions. From an oracle deck were drawn "Fire" as my greatest asset in attaining my desired job, and "The Ship" was drawn as my greatest adversary. Letting things glide will result in my sticking with the current, unsatisfying vocation and only action will move me on to where I want to be. However the Lord of Overabundance cautions me against squandering my time in old, inefficient pursuits that do not relate to the ideal career. Something must be done to move past inefficient habits. Choose what diversions are most important and restrict all else that does not contribute to vocational advancement.
While I have the switchboard job I have reliable income, a place to stay, the means to feed myself, and some time to relax. I will enjoy my time with J____ regardless of what we do.
With my current lineup of Projects and Events there is uncertainty other than the commmitment of much time and energy for the means of survival for only a limited time - which is not to say the current job is reliable.
I will say No to FWO.
I will say No to NTIF.
I will say No to Akon.
I will stay committed to OPIX for this next event, but only because it is a short thing requiring minimal preparation on my part, and I'll be able to help out a friend in the interim. I will take the other OPIX events by ear.
I will stay committed to the Mural but only until I can legitimately put it on ice until the client further commits to the degree I have, or decides to go a different route with it.
I will redirect my focus to building inroads with professional Meeting, Event, and Convention Planners. I will volunteer my creative free time to them in order to better build and grow my resume, my experience and skill sets, my network, and land a vocation that permits me to live a life where I feel the act of fulfillment in my work, can take care of myself fully, pay old debts, and still have time for special bonding with my loved ones.