I don't understand
Am I too conservative to be a queer? I didn't think I was that conservative. I think back to the emails that go out on the queerwomen list. E requested that more women participate in SOSAS so that questions like "How do lesbians have sex" can be appropriately responded to by members of the community - which I agree with - that's great. But then L responded with a request for lesbian sex books and erotica at the Center - saying that perhaps more information would be disseminated if they were available.
I mean . . . I am very pro lesbian sexuality and education and information sharing. But I don't feel like it's the appropriate place for sex books and erotica - especially the latter since it provides very little safe sex information. It's not like there are gay male sex books and it's a matter of inequality. The center is for supporting the academic and safety issues of queer students. Yeah, there's a lot of books there - but they are pretty much all related to academics, research, essays, etc. We have the SHPRC where these books can be acquired. I just think about those coming in for the first time, all scared and exposed, and the times that the conversations that had been happening in the center had been alienating or intimidating for them. Would the inclusion of these books really help that person feel safer? Would it lead to any dissemination of information to those who would ask a SOSAS panel what lesbians do in bed? I think it's highly unlikely.
I guess this touches on the constant struggle I had with M last year. She would taunt me a lot for being too butch or for not talking about sex much. I personally thought she overshared - to the point where I felt like there was no need for anyone to have sex with her - they knew what it would be like. I just don't think that talking about your sex life to everyone necessarily makes you more liberal or liberated or anything. I mean, it's one thing to discuss sex when the subject comes up - it's another to make it the subject yourself, while at work.
J's email that he was upset that he couldn't use the women's restroom in West Lag was also annoying to me. Is this conservative of me? He is upset that some "silly girl" objected to him using the women's restroom. West Lag has a gender neutral bathroom. Some people are very uncomfortable with mixing the bathrooms, and when there is another option that is neutral, I don't see why you can't use that - especially if you aren't female identified. I thought the point was to make everyone feel comfortable in the bathrooms - and clearly this girl wasn't comfortable. And he got so indignant about it - how dare she!
It's just some 18 year old girl at college for the first time. Who knows her situation - but if there is another alternative that is safe for you, why not just use it?
Am I conservative?
I mean . . . I am very pro lesbian sexuality and education and information sharing. But I don't feel like it's the appropriate place for sex books and erotica - especially the latter since it provides very little safe sex information. It's not like there are gay male sex books and it's a matter of inequality. The center is for supporting the academic and safety issues of queer students. Yeah, there's a lot of books there - but they are pretty much all related to academics, research, essays, etc. We have the SHPRC where these books can be acquired. I just think about those coming in for the first time, all scared and exposed, and the times that the conversations that had been happening in the center had been alienating or intimidating for them. Would the inclusion of these books really help that person feel safer? Would it lead to any dissemination of information to those who would ask a SOSAS panel what lesbians do in bed? I think it's highly unlikely.
I guess this touches on the constant struggle I had with M last year. She would taunt me a lot for being too butch or for not talking about sex much. I personally thought she overshared - to the point where I felt like there was no need for anyone to have sex with her - they knew what it would be like. I just don't think that talking about your sex life to everyone necessarily makes you more liberal or liberated or anything. I mean, it's one thing to discuss sex when the subject comes up - it's another to make it the subject yourself, while at work.
J's email that he was upset that he couldn't use the women's restroom in West Lag was also annoying to me. Is this conservative of me? He is upset that some "silly girl" objected to him using the women's restroom. West Lag has a gender neutral bathroom. Some people are very uncomfortable with mixing the bathrooms, and when there is another option that is neutral, I don't see why you can't use that - especially if you aren't female identified. I thought the point was to make everyone feel comfortable in the bathrooms - and clearly this girl wasn't comfortable. And he got so indignant about it - how dare she!
It's just some 18 year old girl at college for the first time. Who knows her situation - but if there is another alternative that is safe for you, why not just use it?
Am I conservative?