this is my depressed update... its been a while
It's really funny I find these really random songs that exactly describe either my life, or something that is happening in my life. This time its Since U Been Gone by Kelly Clarkson. I'm not really sure what is wrong with me but I can tell that something is wrong. I hate being 16 I just want to grow up, go to college, get married, see the world, have kids. I hate the fact that I am suck in Virgina Beach! I just can't wait until next summer, so many things are going to happen. My life is a roller coaster, one day I'm sooo happy then the next day I can't stop crying. Gosh I need help. I feel like I have nobody to turn to... at all. I hate the fact that it seems like everyone around me is happy and I just put on an act and act like I am happy when inside I'm crying. Everyone thinks of me as the dramatic person, and yes I am dramatic, but there are things in my life that nobody knows about... things that I don't tell anyone (not even Sean). I feel betrayed by so many people that I don't know who I can trust anymore. When I start to trust them, they ditch me, or dump me or whatever you want to call it. I can feel myself becoming depressed again, and if any of you know me... you know what happens when I get depressed. Gosh I hate myself! Why do I do this to myself and to the people I love? I can't help it... Yeah, this was a depressing entry but its how I feel right now. This is one of my random rants....