019 ♚ [action, OTA academy students] The only way out is through everything she's running from

[nocorsetsplease]

[For four days, she had scarcely made an effort to leave the comforts and shielding walls of her own chambers.  Too much had transpired, too many old wounds ripped, left bleeding and open to fester.  Too many of her fears had been tested, and despite all her assured confidence in nearly every aspect of her life, Elizabeth Swann had never felt so

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[lovewheniwin]

[It was only via second hand information that Rourke had learned of Miss Swann's return to the Academy, though he wasn't all that surprised when he didn't see her out and about right away. He knew that the Mist was infamous for attacking a person where they were most vulnerable, tearing open old wounds and making new ones.

Still, after several days, he felt that he should go and check on her and see how she was fairing. Perhaps she was simply fatigued and resting off her ordeal. Perhaps not.

He's surprised to find her not only not in her room, but out alone on campus. As he approaches, he can see that she's not doing well even before the open bottle becomes visible. Stopping at her side, he sits down next to her with a sigh.]

Drinking alone isn't a good habit to pick up, Miss Swann.

[nocorsetsplease]

No. I suppose not.

[The bottle pauses before her lips before she tilts her head back for another swig. She scrunches her nose and presses her dry lips together. A worthy burning.]

How do you fare, Commander?

[She asked the question out of keeping conversation, not giving much thought to it. She was still a bit consumed by her thoughts. Thoughts that with enough interaction, she would slowly pull out of. Everything just felt so hazy... she detached from the granules that made up her reality.]

[lovewheniwin]

Better than most.

[With Elizabeth definitely being in that "most" category. He reaches over his hand, to see if she was willing to share. Best way not to drink alone is to drink with someone else, after all.]

I heard that you'd returned, but came to check on you when you hadn't shown yourself on campus after several days. Had a feeling things may not be going well.

[nocorsetsplease]

They are... better.

[It doesn't sound too convincing, but she says it anyway. It's more to tell herself than any other. She'll have to believe it in order to move forward, after all.

Seeing the extended hand, she gazes over her shoulder at Rourke before handing him the bottle with a small slosh.]

Yet they're not the same as they were. I don't know if they will be.

[lovewheniwin]

It's not likely that things will be the same. For all intents and purposes, we're in a war. No one ever looks at things the same after they come back from that.

[Rourke isn't one to gloss over things just to make it easier on people. Especially not for someone like Elizabeth who he things highly of. No, he gives it to her straight. She'll thank him for it.]

But, as they say, what doesn't kill us makes us stronger. It goes for relationships as well.

[nocorsetsplease]

I have face countless foes that are not of this world. But it is far stranger a thing to be at war with that I cannot raise a sword against. I cannot be the face to launch a thousand ships at an unearthly devilish cloud. Lord Beckett was the devil's apprentice, Davy Jones his fallen angel of death, but this Mist...

I cannot define it, let alone fight it.

[lovewheniwin]

If there is no way to fight it then there is no point in any of us being here.

Personally, I don't believe in fighting losing battles, Miss Swann but this is a battle where losing is not an option.

[nocorsetsplease]

Nor do I! Yet what am I supposed to do against something that dangles a dead father in front of a daughter's eyes!

I don't have any choice. Everything in regards to this rests on my shoulders for the sake of my Brethren. You don't have to tell me about losing, Commander.

[Her voice strains with a pained sort of anger, anger at herself for not knowing the answer to her own damned questions.]

What the bloody hell do they expect me to do?

[lovewheniwin]

To carry on, Miss Swann.

[He finally takes a swig of what she was drinking, light grunt only indication that he feels the same burn, but his face remains passive as he allows his words to sink in before continuing.]

It's the mantle that we take up when we become leaders. When everybody's ready to bolt and their spirits are ready to break, we have to be the ones who do not falter. It's easier to say than to do, but I see that quality in you.

Have you ever heard the word invictus?

[nocorsetsplease]

Latin. Of course...I had been instructed in a bit of Latin before I was given proper lessons in French.

[She sits there, pondering it for a moment. Unconquered. In remaining standing, there one is faced with no defeat.]

Perhaps something I should become reacquainted with.

[lovewheniwin]

Indeed it is. When you've had a chance, you should go by the library. Look up a guy named William Ernest Henley. He wrote a little something on the matter that you might find...inspiring.

[nocorsetsplease]

[She nods, offering a small smile.]

Thank you, Commander. I shall see to it.

[lovewheniwin]

You're welcome, Miss Swann.

[With a light smile and a grunt, he rises to his feet and brushes off his pants.]

I hope to see you in better spirits soon.

[nocorsetsplease]

[Despite his first words to her, she looks at him with an extended palm.]

Might I be having back my bottle?

[She smiles reassuringly. No, she won't drink herself to oblivion. She might just get something to eat, but she's certainly not going to squander the rum.]

[lovewheniwin]

Hmm?

[He glanced down as though he'd forgotten it was in his hand, raising a brow before giving her a smirk.]

I suppose so. Next time you decide to run off drinking, you better come get me.

[nocorsetsplease]

Aye aye, sir.

[She returned his smirk and her gaze looked back toward the horizon. She'd wait till the stars were out, then find something to do in the night air. She couldn't go back. Not yet.]