drabble! nothing to fear inside
nothing to fear inside
rabin (vixx), g
1856 words
fluff, college!au
through the darkness and the light
some sun has got to rise
my sun is your sun
your sun is our sun
(yeah yeah yeahs - despair)
hongbin lays in the grass, clutching the blades and feeling the early morning dew on his fingers, seeping into his sweater. a shiver jolts him out of his sleepy haze and he blinks up to find he’s staring up at the pale lavender sky. it’s close to dawn.
closing his eyes again, he begins moving his arms across the very tips of the grass, alternating between tickling his palms and the backs of his hands with each stroke up and down. he swings his legs out and makes a grass angel, if that’s even possible. he chuckles at himself before stilling once more and letting his limbs fall, they feel heavy anyways.
birds have been chatting in the distance for awhile and yet only now does it seem to really register in his mind. it smells like fresh dirt and sand. he must be near a park? the beach? breathing in deep once more, he holds his breath this time. he can feel his heart beat, blood pumping through his body, feel the pulse in his finger tips as he flexes them. he can’t smell the ocean, taste the salt in back of his throat as he breathes in deep through his nose.
this time the lavender is fading into a light blue. a barely there hint of blue that looks like it’s chasing the purple away. like it doesn’t belong. but black is a medley of all colors and no color at all, so what does blue have against purple? actually it’s probably the sun’s fault. it’s the sun’s fault for swelling into the sky and pushing all the darkness from the night away, making the colors bleed into one another and muddle up into a mess of light meeting dark. he’ll try to remember this color for later in the evening, when it’s reversed. dark chasing light once more.
"you’re gonna get dirty."
it’s a statement that he’s unsure whether or not he’s supposed to argue with. because he knows that already, it just came down to whether or not he cared at the moment. and obviously he didn’t. but wonshik was always one to point out the obvious, make sure everyone was aware.
"and wet." he mumbles back.
peeking up through one eye to find the other nodding in agreement as he practically huddles around the package of noodles in his hand as if the last remnants of warmth meekly radiating from it will seep into his flesh. only a pair of long shorts, a loose tank and a hoodie to aid in maintaining any body heat, he notices the slightest quiver of his limbs.
"and you made fun of me for wearing pants."
wonshik makes a face, hat sat backwards as he shakes his head. “it was so hot at the party. i don’t understand how you kept that sweater on to be honest.”
looking above his head and down the field, he sees goal posts in the distance and supposes they’re in the middle of a school yard.
"where are we?"
"incheon. I think."
"i thank god everyday for gracing me with such a good friend. one that’ll get our inebriated selves home."
"hey! i tried to catch a cab but he wouldn’t take us back to hongdae. at least not for 1000 won."
he doesn’t say anything as he contemplates over just how cheap wonshik is or if it’s the fact that they’re just that broke. probably the latter but-
"cheapskate."
he scoffs back, “says the one that wouldn’t give me his wallet and wanted to walk all the way back.”
squeezing his eyes closed, he tries to remember saying such a thing. all that flashes through his memory are various moments of sudden sobriety: sitting in hongdae, sitting on the train, yelling across the room at the party - he can’t recall who or what it was about - and opening a bag of chips at the convenience store. it feels like he’s woken up from a dream he doesn’t quite remember having.
"this night…"
"disappeared? was crazy?" hongbin nods at wonshik’s suggestions, "yeah, i can only remember the cab driver flipping us off as he drove away and you dragging me into the store."
"huh."
"but not why we decided to sit in the middle of a school yard…"
hongbin peers up, feeling the slightest bit of heat prickle his skin. the sun has already begun reaching over the horizon, all the orange and yellows spreading like fire and melting away the cooler tones. he wishes for a moment that he had his DSLR handy. he’d take a picture of everything.
wonshik’s contorted face of confusion as he stares around himself and threads noodles onto his chopsticks, the sky and the upside down goal posts.
wasted night.
it’s a pun. he’s unsure if he should laugh or find it deep.
"was everyone at the party at least?"
wonshik nods, swallowing before responding. “jaehwan somehow dragged taekwoon over. it was…good.”
"so was there a black light?"
"you can’t even remember that early in the night!? how much did you drink?" wonshik snorts, going back to eating.
hongbin tries not to blush as he shrugs. maybe he’d had a bit too much and maybe he’s a bit of a lightweight, that’s not a bad thing. he just didn’t mediate himself properly. lesson learned.
"it didn’t help you kept feeding me doubles."
"just wanted you to loosen up a bit. you kept knocking them back like it was nothing."
"bad influence."
wonshik laughs, incredulous look flashing across his features, “yeah, there was a black light. and paint. inguk-hyung hung a bunch of black paper around the basement that we all used to write stuff.”
hongbin rolls into his side and notices the splashes, streaks and splats of neon paint that cover wonshik’s clothes. there’s even some on his face. a stroke across his neck and faint, messed up hand prints over his sleeves. there’s writing and symbols, maybe a few tags.
"and you decided i needed to go orange again." wonshik points up at his head, chopsticks still in his hand.
he peers up at the tiny patch of hair he can see from above the black adjustable snap on his hat and squints to see the neon paint holding his hair in place like gel. the blond only accentuating the sudden change in color. an unconscious grin pulls wide across his face as he looks down at himself. pink, green, orange and blues dashed across him like he was an empty canvas that needed filling. people’s names, hearts, random memorable words, hands and drawings decorate his clothes now. good thing he didn’t wear his favorite jeans and, sadly, the sweatshirt is a lost cause, no way he’d be able to get any of this paint out.
"and on the subject, you still have a dot on your face."
"oh?" gathering his hand inside his sleeve, he rubs at his cheeks. "still there?"
wonshik hums in response as he chews. he feels for the crusted part of the paint but can’t seem to track it over his flesh, he smiles and hopes he’ll feel the synthetic paint crack on his skin. but nothing.
the quiet chuckle makes him look up at the other man as he rubs his face again “what?”
"smile again."
hongbin smiles again, just a simple pull of his lips. wonshik’s laugh is deeper this time as he reaches out towards him. smile falling as wonshik’s finger makes contact with his cheek, he quickly places his own finger next to it in order to keep track of the paint’s whereabouts.
"cute, it’s on your dimple."
this time a genuine smile as he watches wonshik laugh easily, eyes crinkling and noodles forgotten.
"sounds like something you’d do." he mumbles as he licks his finger and rubs the spot.
"probably."
wonshik watches him as he rubs his face. a sudden rush of heat washes over his face as he peers up at his slack-jawed expression. he looks like an idiot.
"here."
and before he can even make fun of wonshik’s stupid face, he’s licking his thumb and reaching over. hand rested against his cheek as his finger brushes over the same spot, slight wetness tugging on his skin. he tries not to breath as he tilts his head in order to accomodate wonshik’s reach.
"there."
"thanks." he mumbles as the warmth of his hand disappears and he reaches up to rub at the same spot.
"it’s gone."
he sends the other a look as he rolls onto his back again and extends his limbs.
"well, we should probably get going."
he hums, staring at the orange that’s spread across the sky. the sun is caressing his legs and gently reaching over his chest, pushing through his hair. he revels at the contrasting temperatures, the cold dampness of his back and the gentle warmth on the entire front of his body.
"i still feel a little drunk."
wonshik snorts, “same. we need sleep.”
"I’m scared of standing up."
there’s rustling and a groan. he peers over and catches wonshik pushing himself up off the ground and balancing himself on two feet. he shakes his arms, a shiver visibly running through his body once more as he stretches slightly. he hobbles closer and reaches down, “c’mon. we can skip class and sleep all day.”
"already planned that." he reaches up and takes hold of his offered hand.
"what a good student."
hongbin tries to make a face but he’s already being yanked upwards, head heavy as he’s pulled into a sitting position. everything swirls and tilts.
"one. two. thr-"
"wait!" he whines, closing his eyes.
wonshik’s chesty chuckle just makes him squeeze his hand harder in the hope of hurting him in return for his obvious empathy. but it probably feels like nothing more then a silent plea.
"one…" he says slowly.
hongbin lifts his head as he continues the count and let’s himself be assisted up. a shiver runs through him as a gentle breeze catches his damp clothing and the morning sun caresses the back of his neck. glancing up, wonshik is closer then he expects, smile all lopsided and beaming. it’s suddenly hard to breath.
later, he tries not to think too much on wonshik’s prolonged grasp around his wrist - also in his hair and tangled - and the way his eyelids fluttered closed, eyelashes meeting silently. he shivered again but for a completely different reason. the heat on his cheeks and in his stomach as a thumb caressed the thin flesh on his inner wrist.
’incase you can’t remember, you were yelling at everyone in the basement about how good of a kisser i was.’
guilt swells in his stomach as he lays under the covers and tries to pull the memory from his drunken haze to life behind his eyelids. play their first kiss in his mind once more and feel his liquor numb lips trying to press into wonshik’s like his mouth holds all the answers to everything he’s felt over the past few months.
for some reason, all he can hear is wonshik’s laughter ringing in his ears.
this has been sitting in my phone forever so un-beta'd, sorry for any mistakes ;;
first vixx fic/writing atttempt?
rabin (vixx), g
1856 words
fluff, college!au
through the darkness and the light
some sun has got to rise
my sun is your sun
your sun is our sun
(yeah yeah yeahs - despair)
hongbin lays in the grass, clutching the blades and feeling the early morning dew on his fingers, seeping into his sweater. a shiver jolts him out of his sleepy haze and he blinks up to find he’s staring up at the pale lavender sky. it’s close to dawn.
closing his eyes again, he begins moving his arms across the very tips of the grass, alternating between tickling his palms and the backs of his hands with each stroke up and down. he swings his legs out and makes a grass angel, if that’s even possible. he chuckles at himself before stilling once more and letting his limbs fall, they feel heavy anyways.
birds have been chatting in the distance for awhile and yet only now does it seem to really register in his mind. it smells like fresh dirt and sand. he must be near a park? the beach? breathing in deep once more, he holds his breath this time. he can feel his heart beat, blood pumping through his body, feel the pulse in his finger tips as he flexes them. he can’t smell the ocean, taste the salt in back of his throat as he breathes in deep through his nose.
this time the lavender is fading into a light blue. a barely there hint of blue that looks like it’s chasing the purple away. like it doesn’t belong. but black is a medley of all colors and no color at all, so what does blue have against purple? actually it’s probably the sun’s fault. it’s the sun’s fault for swelling into the sky and pushing all the darkness from the night away, making the colors bleed into one another and muddle up into a mess of light meeting dark. he’ll try to remember this color for later in the evening, when it’s reversed. dark chasing light once more.
"you’re gonna get dirty."
it’s a statement that he’s unsure whether or not he’s supposed to argue with. because he knows that already, it just came down to whether or not he cared at the moment. and obviously he didn’t. but wonshik was always one to point out the obvious, make sure everyone was aware.
"and wet." he mumbles back.
peeking up through one eye to find the other nodding in agreement as he practically huddles around the package of noodles in his hand as if the last remnants of warmth meekly radiating from it will seep into his flesh. only a pair of long shorts, a loose tank and a hoodie to aid in maintaining any body heat, he notices the slightest quiver of his limbs.
"and you made fun of me for wearing pants."
wonshik makes a face, hat sat backwards as he shakes his head. “it was so hot at the party. i don’t understand how you kept that sweater on to be honest.”
looking above his head and down the field, he sees goal posts in the distance and supposes they’re in the middle of a school yard.
"where are we?"
"incheon. I think."
"i thank god everyday for gracing me with such a good friend. one that’ll get our inebriated selves home."
"hey! i tried to catch a cab but he wouldn’t take us back to hongdae. at least not for 1000 won."
he doesn’t say anything as he contemplates over just how cheap wonshik is or if it’s the fact that they’re just that broke. probably the latter but-
"cheapskate."
he scoffs back, “says the one that wouldn’t give me his wallet and wanted to walk all the way back.”
squeezing his eyes closed, he tries to remember saying such a thing. all that flashes through his memory are various moments of sudden sobriety: sitting in hongdae, sitting on the train, yelling across the room at the party - he can’t recall who or what it was about - and opening a bag of chips at the convenience store. it feels like he’s woken up from a dream he doesn’t quite remember having.
"this night…"
"disappeared? was crazy?" hongbin nods at wonshik’s suggestions, "yeah, i can only remember the cab driver flipping us off as he drove away and you dragging me into the store."
"huh."
"but not why we decided to sit in the middle of a school yard…"
hongbin peers up, feeling the slightest bit of heat prickle his skin. the sun has already begun reaching over the horizon, all the orange and yellows spreading like fire and melting away the cooler tones. he wishes for a moment that he had his DSLR handy. he’d take a picture of everything.
wonshik’s contorted face of confusion as he stares around himself and threads noodles onto his chopsticks, the sky and the upside down goal posts.
wasted night.
it’s a pun. he’s unsure if he should laugh or find it deep.
"was everyone at the party at least?"
wonshik nods, swallowing before responding. “jaehwan somehow dragged taekwoon over. it was…good.”
"so was there a black light?"
"you can’t even remember that early in the night!? how much did you drink?" wonshik snorts, going back to eating.
hongbin tries not to blush as he shrugs. maybe he’d had a bit too much and maybe he’s a bit of a lightweight, that’s not a bad thing. he just didn’t mediate himself properly. lesson learned.
"it didn’t help you kept feeding me doubles."
"just wanted you to loosen up a bit. you kept knocking them back like it was nothing."
"bad influence."
wonshik laughs, incredulous look flashing across his features, “yeah, there was a black light. and paint. inguk-hyung hung a bunch of black paper around the basement that we all used to write stuff.”
hongbin rolls into his side and notices the splashes, streaks and splats of neon paint that cover wonshik’s clothes. there’s even some on his face. a stroke across his neck and faint, messed up hand prints over his sleeves. there’s writing and symbols, maybe a few tags.
"and you decided i needed to go orange again." wonshik points up at his head, chopsticks still in his hand.
he peers up at the tiny patch of hair he can see from above the black adjustable snap on his hat and squints to see the neon paint holding his hair in place like gel. the blond only accentuating the sudden change in color. an unconscious grin pulls wide across his face as he looks down at himself. pink, green, orange and blues dashed across him like he was an empty canvas that needed filling. people’s names, hearts, random memorable words, hands and drawings decorate his clothes now. good thing he didn’t wear his favorite jeans and, sadly, the sweatshirt is a lost cause, no way he’d be able to get any of this paint out.
"and on the subject, you still have a dot on your face."
"oh?" gathering his hand inside his sleeve, he rubs at his cheeks. "still there?"
wonshik hums in response as he chews. he feels for the crusted part of the paint but can’t seem to track it over his flesh, he smiles and hopes he’ll feel the synthetic paint crack on his skin. but nothing.
the quiet chuckle makes him look up at the other man as he rubs his face again “what?”
"smile again."
hongbin smiles again, just a simple pull of his lips. wonshik’s laugh is deeper this time as he reaches out towards him. smile falling as wonshik’s finger makes contact with his cheek, he quickly places his own finger next to it in order to keep track of the paint’s whereabouts.
"cute, it’s on your dimple."
this time a genuine smile as he watches wonshik laugh easily, eyes crinkling and noodles forgotten.
"sounds like something you’d do." he mumbles as he licks his finger and rubs the spot.
"probably."
wonshik watches him as he rubs his face. a sudden rush of heat washes over his face as he peers up at his slack-jawed expression. he looks like an idiot.
"here."
and before he can even make fun of wonshik’s stupid face, he’s licking his thumb and reaching over. hand rested against his cheek as his finger brushes over the same spot, slight wetness tugging on his skin. he tries not to breath as he tilts his head in order to accomodate wonshik’s reach.
"there."
"thanks." he mumbles as the warmth of his hand disappears and he reaches up to rub at the same spot.
"it’s gone."
he sends the other a look as he rolls onto his back again and extends his limbs.
"well, we should probably get going."
he hums, staring at the orange that’s spread across the sky. the sun is caressing his legs and gently reaching over his chest, pushing through his hair. he revels at the contrasting temperatures, the cold dampness of his back and the gentle warmth on the entire front of his body.
"i still feel a little drunk."
wonshik snorts, “same. we need sleep.”
"I’m scared of standing up."
there’s rustling and a groan. he peers over and catches wonshik pushing himself up off the ground and balancing himself on two feet. he shakes his arms, a shiver visibly running through his body once more as he stretches slightly. he hobbles closer and reaches down, “c’mon. we can skip class and sleep all day.”
"already planned that." he reaches up and takes hold of his offered hand.
"what a good student."
hongbin tries to make a face but he’s already being yanked upwards, head heavy as he’s pulled into a sitting position. everything swirls and tilts.
"one. two. thr-"
"wait!" he whines, closing his eyes.
wonshik’s chesty chuckle just makes him squeeze his hand harder in the hope of hurting him in return for his obvious empathy. but it probably feels like nothing more then a silent plea.
"one…" he says slowly.
hongbin lifts his head as he continues the count and let’s himself be assisted up. a shiver runs through him as a gentle breeze catches his damp clothing and the morning sun caresses the back of his neck. glancing up, wonshik is closer then he expects, smile all lopsided and beaming. it’s suddenly hard to breath.
later, he tries not to think too much on wonshik’s prolonged grasp around his wrist - also in his hair and tangled - and the way his eyelids fluttered closed, eyelashes meeting silently. he shivered again but for a completely different reason. the heat on his cheeks and in his stomach as a thumb caressed the thin flesh on his inner wrist.
’incase you can’t remember, you were yelling at everyone in the basement about how good of a kisser i was.’
guilt swells in his stomach as he lays under the covers and tries to pull the memory from his drunken haze to life behind his eyelids. play their first kiss in his mind once more and feel his liquor numb lips trying to press into wonshik’s like his mouth holds all the answers to everything he’s felt over the past few months.
for some reason, all he can hear is wonshik’s laughter ringing in his ears.
this has been sitting in my phone forever so un-beta'd, sorry for any mistakes ;;
first vixx fic/writing atttempt?