Series of random thoughts which could have been posted over the festival period, but weren't
By approximately the 20th of December I had finally persuaded V that Christmas had not yet passed. He sat up in bed one morning with an, "Argh, OMG!" (or words to that effect) "Christmas is coming, oh noes!" This, of course, immediately reminded me of the delightful story in Tove Jansson'sMoominland Midwinter - or at least, in one of the Moomin books - in which the Moomin family wake early from their winter hibernation and are terrified by the general panic around them into believing that Christmas is a horrific beast which must be pacified with gifts, food, and decorations. This is remarkably similar to the ancient Chinese story to explain their Spring Festival. Once the primal village was terrorised by a rampaging monster called Nian1 which arrived regularly each year. Eventually it was realised - either by a child or by a mysterious old woman (I've heard both versions) - that Nian was afraid of the colour red and of loud noises. Thus, Chinese New Year is celebrated with an awful lot of red and an awful lot of noise.
It's interesting how the greatest festival of the year - the mid-winter feast, common to all northern hemisphere cultures2 - is also such a major source of deep, collective anxiety.
1 Nian, in an incredibly literal way, means 'year'.
2 Going out on a limb with this assertion. But I suspect I'm right.
*****
The Guardian linked me to this article complaining about the Asda Christmas ad. In China,of course, we are not subjected to such ads, so it may be easy for me to get a bit blasé, but the complaints rang a little hollow for me. Yes, I am a Christian of some kind or another (more the other and less the some, but that's a different story), and, yes, the incarnation is vital part of Christian theology and the message of 'peace on earth' is needed ever more desperately each successive year. But. Peoples have been gathering at mid-winter for a huge feast / piss up / party with family and friends since the dawn of time. Anyone with access to wikipedia can learn about Yule, and Saturnalia, and the Feast of Mithras, and the fact that Christmas wasn't celebrated before the third century CE. It's also clear that the UK is a post-Christian society, since the overwhelming majority of the populace are not practising Christians. Therefore, I kind of wonder what a CofE vicar really expects to find in a Christmas ad? The eating, the drinking, the lights, the decorations and the presents are all much, much, much older than Christ, and, I suspect, are much more deeply rooted in the collective subconscious than He is. So, what is there to complain about? Possibly the soulless commercialisation - which is enough to make anybody weep - but, it's a tv advertisement, and thus, a certain monetary-mindedness is only to be expected.
Then again, I am torn, because Christmas in China - a co-opted festival celebrated only vaguely by the young, the cool, and the department stores - can be extremely depressing. In fact, I kind of wish they'd just leave it alone and focus on their own festivals - though the fireworks at midnight are rather fun in a peace-destroying way.
Possibly I'm looking for a mid-winter celebration that has soul. It could be a sacrifice to the returning sun, it could be awe-filled veneration of the infant, or it could be gratitude for the bounty of the seasons and the love of friends and family. Just as long as there's something deep rather than pure shallow commercialisation or fashion.
***
On the first day of Christmas my true love gave to me,
a pink Apple Nano iPod. ______________(Though he spent a while teasing me by pretending to have got me nothing first.)
On the second day of Christmas my true love gave to me,
two hours of massages _________________(Our local massage house closed and we had to use up our card quickly.)
and a pink Apple Nano iPod.
On the third day of Christmas my true love gave to me,
three hours of sulking ___________________________(All the way through my friend's birthday party. Joy. At least he came...)
two hours of massages
and a pink Apple Nano iPod.
On the fourth day of Christmas I kind of lost track due to having to pull an all-nighter to get my reports ready for the fifth day of Christmas when I saw my students in Jiading for the last time and did final exams with them. Then on the sixth day of Christmas - when the cold we'd been sharing since the 23rd started to get really hardcore - I had to go into the office, but at least I managed to pick up some interesting books from the shared library, and to get to a pharmacy for some cold-relief. On the seventh day of Christmas - New Year's Eve - I tried to grade the exams, but ended up passed out in bed for most of the afternoon, getting up only in time to see the New Year in with a couple of friends, some champagne, and a spectacular view of fireworks through the bamboo leaves. On the eighth day we got dragged out for dinner with friends in Pudong (miles away), but we did get a box of Ferrero Rocher out of it. On the ninth day I cooked my true love a romantic dinner and then got plastered at a friend's leaving do. On the tenth day, I finally managed to get the exams graded, and on the eleventh I delivered them to the academy's office, nearly froze to death doing so, and vowed not to set foot outside again. (I did though, because one of the resident stray cats in our area started following V around begging pitifully for food, so he asked me to bring some down. He's constantly pretending to be anti-animal, and regularly proving that he isn't.)
On the twelfth day of Christmas - I may invite some friends round to dinner. And take down the tree. Not that the tree has ever exactly been up, since V bought a tiny plastic one (no real trees to be found) which the cats have been able to knock over with a single swipe of the paw in order to steal the baubles, and thus it's spent a lot more time on the floor than on display.
******
The tenth day (Saturday) was also the Laba festival, and as V is northern Chinese, we had to eat Laba porridge. He also wanted to worship the Buddha with a gift of oranges, incense, and rice. Unfortunately, we discovered that we do not own any Buddha images, except for an ancient stained and faded toy plastic laughing Buddha I bought years ago because it rocked about like a weebil whilst playing its own laughter soundtrack. The mechanism has long since rusted away, I'm afraid, but at least he does still rock.
*****
New Year's resolution: learn to drink coffee. Not going so well. On the first I didn't drink any coffee. On the second I did have two coffee-vodka-kahlua shooters at the bar, so that was something. On the third I tried a caramel cappuccino from a nearby café. Didn't like it. And today I haven't managed any. Advice?
*****
While clearing out some junk from the wardrobe today I found, amongst many other things,
- my PADI diver's card
- the party favours from V's friend's wedding back in October
- my degree certificate
- the confession I had to sign back in 2002 when the waiban and I both forgot to renew my visa and I ended up being an illegal alien
- a long list of text messages which I'd deleted from my phone, including best wishes for Teacher's Day from G (the boy who died)
- my mother's hat which I packed accidentally last winter thinking it was mine
- and a £10 note.
It's interesting how the greatest festival of the year - the mid-winter feast, common to all northern hemisphere cultures2 - is also such a major source of deep, collective anxiety.
1 Nian, in an incredibly literal way, means 'year'.
2 Going out on a limb with this assertion. But I suspect I'm right.
*****
The Guardian linked me to this article complaining about the Asda Christmas ad. In China,of course, we are not subjected to such ads, so it may be easy for me to get a bit blasé, but the complaints rang a little hollow for me. Yes, I am a Christian of some kind or another (more the other and less the some, but that's a different story), and, yes, the incarnation is vital part of Christian theology and the message of 'peace on earth' is needed ever more desperately each successive year. But. Peoples have been gathering at mid-winter for a huge feast / piss up / party with family and friends since the dawn of time. Anyone with access to wikipedia can learn about Yule, and Saturnalia, and the Feast of Mithras, and the fact that Christmas wasn't celebrated before the third century CE. It's also clear that the UK is a post-Christian society, since the overwhelming majority of the populace are not practising Christians. Therefore, I kind of wonder what a CofE vicar really expects to find in a Christmas ad? The eating, the drinking, the lights, the decorations and the presents are all much, much, much older than Christ, and, I suspect, are much more deeply rooted in the collective subconscious than He is. So, what is there to complain about? Possibly the soulless commercialisation - which is enough to make anybody weep - but, it's a tv advertisement, and thus, a certain monetary-mindedness is only to be expected.
Then again, I am torn, because Christmas in China - a co-opted festival celebrated only vaguely by the young, the cool, and the department stores - can be extremely depressing. In fact, I kind of wish they'd just leave it alone and focus on their own festivals - though the fireworks at midnight are rather fun in a peace-destroying way.
Possibly I'm looking for a mid-winter celebration that has soul. It could be a sacrifice to the returning sun, it could be awe-filled veneration of the infant, or it could be gratitude for the bounty of the seasons and the love of friends and family. Just as long as there's something deep rather than pure shallow commercialisation or fashion.
***
On the first day of Christmas my true love gave to me,
a pink Apple Nano iPod. ______________(Though he spent a while teasing me by pretending to have got me nothing first.)
On the second day of Christmas my true love gave to me,
two hours of massages _________________(Our local massage house closed and we had to use up our card quickly.)
and a pink Apple Nano iPod.
On the third day of Christmas my true love gave to me,
three hours of sulking ___________________________(All the way through my friend's birthday party. Joy. At least he came...)
two hours of massages
and a pink Apple Nano iPod.
On the fourth day of Christmas I kind of lost track due to having to pull an all-nighter to get my reports ready for the fifth day of Christmas when I saw my students in Jiading for the last time and did final exams with them. Then on the sixth day of Christmas - when the cold we'd been sharing since the 23rd started to get really hardcore - I had to go into the office, but at least I managed to pick up some interesting books from the shared library, and to get to a pharmacy for some cold-relief. On the seventh day of Christmas - New Year's Eve - I tried to grade the exams, but ended up passed out in bed for most of the afternoon, getting up only in time to see the New Year in with a couple of friends, some champagne, and a spectacular view of fireworks through the bamboo leaves. On the eighth day we got dragged out for dinner with friends in Pudong (miles away), but we did get a box of Ferrero Rocher out of it. On the ninth day I cooked my true love a romantic dinner and then got plastered at a friend's leaving do. On the tenth day, I finally managed to get the exams graded, and on the eleventh I delivered them to the academy's office, nearly froze to death doing so, and vowed not to set foot outside again. (I did though, because one of the resident stray cats in our area started following V around begging pitifully for food, so he asked me to bring some down. He's constantly pretending to be anti-animal, and regularly proving that he isn't.)
On the twelfth day of Christmas - I may invite some friends round to dinner. And take down the tree. Not that the tree has ever exactly been up, since V bought a tiny plastic one (no real trees to be found) which the cats have been able to knock over with a single swipe of the paw in order to steal the baubles, and thus it's spent a lot more time on the floor than on display.
******
The tenth day (Saturday) was also the Laba festival, and as V is northern Chinese, we had to eat Laba porridge. He also wanted to worship the Buddha with a gift of oranges, incense, and rice. Unfortunately, we discovered that we do not own any Buddha images, except for an ancient stained and faded toy plastic laughing Buddha I bought years ago because it rocked about like a weebil whilst playing its own laughter soundtrack. The mechanism has long since rusted away, I'm afraid, but at least he does still rock.
*****
New Year's resolution: learn to drink coffee. Not going so well. On the first I didn't drink any coffee. On the second I did have two coffee-vodka-kahlua shooters at the bar, so that was something. On the third I tried a caramel cappuccino from a nearby café. Didn't like it. And today I haven't managed any. Advice?
*****
While clearing out some junk from the wardrobe today I found, amongst many other things,
- my PADI diver's card
- the party favours from V's friend's wedding back in October
- my degree certificate
- the confession I had to sign back in 2002 when the waiban and I both forgot to renew my visa and I ended up being an illegal alien
- a long list of text messages which I'd deleted from my phone, including best wishes for Teacher's Day from G (the boy who died)
- my mother's hat which I packed accidentally last winter thinking it was mine
- and a £10 note.