I love the sound of rain outside, and the dizzy achey hypersensitive feeling of sleep deprivation because I slept for three hours last night
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speaking of hugs, i want you to know that i think you give very wonderflating hugs very good hugs! (hv i told you about wonderflating before? not just inflating, but wonderflating! as in hooray hooray!)
& iv bn especially touched by autumn this autumn as well. i noticed something especially great while i was walking thru my yard & forest this morning -- maybe the brilliant mercurial foliage called my attn to this & it was always this way & i just never noticed b4 or maybe the arbor vitae in the yard really did change color so...carefully, shrewdly, eloquently bc of the season. it was lighter green on the very outsides & tops of regions that inside; the way the shades & spirits moved thru it just tingled perfect perfect harmony -- unity consciousness id say for sure. oh boy.
the only thing is im not too very good at plants & so i dont even kno for sure if it really is arbor vitae, eek, how scary it cn be to admit in every sense of the word
it's so hard to kno what u truly want. i think you cn tell by what you do; sometimes knoing what you find in yrself is difficult too bc it cn involve an amount of annihilation, which is what the ego's job is to struggle against, silly ego
by the way, im up replying to yr post so early in the morning on account of not going to sleep last night -- i want to quit caffeine all the way --
i ws just outside agn for a minute & sally the sitting tree who lives in our back yard told me that what mks admitting difficult is when you still hv barriers of pale shadow & downy tuft pseudoreified into brick...or something...plus, the arbor vitae of my last comment is not arbor vitae but is very very kind in its own right :o) & was friendly to me
& iv bn especially touched by autumn this autumn as well. i noticed something especially great while i was walking thru my yard & forest this morning -- maybe the brilliant mercurial foliage called my attn to this & it was always this way & i just never noticed b4 or maybe the arbor vitae in the yard really did change color so...carefully, shrewdly, eloquently bc of the season. it was lighter green on the very outsides & tops of regions that inside; the way the shades & spirits moved thru it just tingled perfect perfect harmony -- unity consciousness id say for sure. oh boy.
the only thing is im not too very good at plants & so i dont even kno for sure if it really is arbor vitae, eek, how scary it cn be to admit in every sense of the word
it's so hard to kno what u truly want. i think you cn tell by what you do; sometimes knoing what you find in yrself is difficult too bc it cn involve an amount of annihilation, which is what the ego's job is to struggle against, silly ego
by the way, im up replying to yr post so early in the morning on account of not going to sleep last night -- i want to quit caffeine all the way --
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