Son, botton your coat! We're goin' down to get some warmth from the Devil.
Wellllll I feel fucked up. I just woke up from a three and a half hours-long nap, and WOWOWOW was that weird. It is all dark out, wtf?! And yeah, we just ordered Chinese food because it's still motherfucking pouring outside and nobody wants to make the hideous two foot trek to the deece. ahaha we're so uber lame it's terrific.
So today in English class my English teacher said something SO profound. Something along the lines of... why do we read fiction, watch movies? We do it because we're all transfixed with emotion, especially the ones we hope to avoid. Feeling sad is exciting, sometimes. Being greusomely murdered would be horrifying, but I bet you'd feel so damn alive while it was happening. Fiction bridges the gap between the intense emotion we crave and the safety we need to keep us alive. Apparently, when you read about "falling off a cliff", some of the same neurons are firing as would be if you were actually falling off of a cliff. So like... fiction teaches us how to feel, think, act in certain situations... situations that nobody could ever experience on a daily basis. So it's like... exercising the part of your mind that rarely gets a chance to function. But, when it does, you know how to feel, because you've already been trained by fiction. ISN'T THAT CRAZY... Yeah, okay, so Prof. Means said it way more profoundly. Damn his eloquentness. haha. He talked to me today at the Retreat and it made me so happy. He is like... changing my life, man! I wanna be just like him when I grow up. Except girl version... and maybe less little and black-rimmed-glasses-tastic. Hahaha but yeah. He's the M-A-N.
So while I was falling asleep I got to thinking a bit, and you know what's weird? In our minds we have THOUSANDS of memories just stored up, waiting to be retrieved. But what about the ones that we never think to look back on? What about the five year old birthday party that we'll never think about again, even though we really do still have the memory up there? And the worst part is, we can never look through what we have to know what's up there. We just have to wait for memories to pop up on their own. But I bet some really great ones just never do. I wish I had a memory filing cabinet, so when I had a quiet moment I could just browse through alphabetically until something fun came up. But, no... they're just up there, elusive, never showing until their meek little selves unless the absolute perfect time arises. But... many of these perfect times will never come. It's just a damn shame.
Today in cog. sci. I wrote some poetry about things. It was really fun. I kept laughing in my mind and smiling and the professor thinks I'm insane... haha because one time I wrote a paper about Bambi and I guess she didn't like it so much 'cause she gave me a C+, the bitch. ahhaha. ANNNYWAY... here're a few of the more interesting parts, in excerpt:
"...we're all raining down on each other, in the driveway of the universe - we've come home and the porch light glows orange..."
Apocalypse, 2nd Coming---
"... draped over existence, my sunken banana peel goes back into obscurity, its distant aunts and uncles, lost to a dirty street in Chicago, resting beneath blinking lights, it comes down in embodied yellow shafts, foreshadowing the inevitable - the family is broken..."
Impressive Locomotion is Possible!---
"..>Companies in the field of robotics, enormous practicality clumping together (burning-linking-moving-grinding), AI in the living room, on the battlefield! Let's spend time together, years together- we'll build a new team and traverse the terrain, we'll vacuum the carpet, together, forever, and then we'll sit back, relax, and wonder... why did we ever bother?..."
So yup. I don't know, man! Ummm I think I'm going to go do something. That chinese food just made me really want a nap though. HA I already did that. Hardxcore.
Guess what guys, I have an awesome third-grade style crush. It's terrific. I forgot how much fun these are! Tee fuckin' hee!
Aight. I CANNOT BELIEVE IT MOTHERFUCKING SNOWED IN VERMONT AND I MISSED IT! WAHHH. I guess it's supposed to snow a tad here tomorrow morning, but... meh, not the same!!! I miss me my Vermont weather sometimes. Haha I know I know, I'm only over in NY. BUT STILL.
Today is the first day I haven't really felt like crying at all. It was a shitty depressing day, but... it was good! Yeah! I love overcoming depression the natural way.
I hope Thursday won't bring all this goodness crashing down, shattering my bubble of chrystaline happiness with sadness... I have no control though. I just have to hope that everything will come out okay. Please?
Bye kiddos... have pleasantness... =]] Man I should nap like that more often.
xoxox. willaaaa.
So today in English class my English teacher said something SO profound. Something along the lines of... why do we read fiction, watch movies? We do it because we're all transfixed with emotion, especially the ones we hope to avoid. Feeling sad is exciting, sometimes. Being greusomely murdered would be horrifying, but I bet you'd feel so damn alive while it was happening. Fiction bridges the gap between the intense emotion we crave and the safety we need to keep us alive. Apparently, when you read about "falling off a cliff", some of the same neurons are firing as would be if you were actually falling off of a cliff. So like... fiction teaches us how to feel, think, act in certain situations... situations that nobody could ever experience on a daily basis. So it's like... exercising the part of your mind that rarely gets a chance to function. But, when it does, you know how to feel, because you've already been trained by fiction. ISN'T THAT CRAZY... Yeah, okay, so Prof. Means said it way more profoundly. Damn his eloquentness. haha. He talked to me today at the Retreat and it made me so happy. He is like... changing my life, man! I wanna be just like him when I grow up. Except girl version... and maybe less little and black-rimmed-glasses-tastic. Hahaha but yeah. He's the M-A-N.
So while I was falling asleep I got to thinking a bit, and you know what's weird? In our minds we have THOUSANDS of memories just stored up, waiting to be retrieved. But what about the ones that we never think to look back on? What about the five year old birthday party that we'll never think about again, even though we really do still have the memory up there? And the worst part is, we can never look through what we have to know what's up there. We just have to wait for memories to pop up on their own. But I bet some really great ones just never do. I wish I had a memory filing cabinet, so when I had a quiet moment I could just browse through alphabetically until something fun came up. But, no... they're just up there, elusive, never showing until their meek little selves unless the absolute perfect time arises. But... many of these perfect times will never come. It's just a damn shame.
Today in cog. sci. I wrote some poetry about things. It was really fun. I kept laughing in my mind and smiling and the professor thinks I'm insane... haha because one time I wrote a paper about Bambi and I guess she didn't like it so much 'cause she gave me a C+, the bitch. ahhaha. ANNNYWAY... here're a few of the more interesting parts, in excerpt:
"...we're all raining down on each other, in the driveway of the universe - we've come home and the porch light glows orange..."
Apocalypse, 2nd Coming---
"... draped over existence, my sunken banana peel goes back into obscurity, its distant aunts and uncles, lost to a dirty street in Chicago, resting beneath blinking lights, it comes down in embodied yellow shafts, foreshadowing the inevitable - the family is broken..."
Impressive Locomotion is Possible!---
"..>Companies in the field of robotics, enormous practicality clumping together (burning-linking-moving-grinding), AI in the living room, on the battlefield! Let's spend time together, years together- we'll build a new team and traverse the terrain, we'll vacuum the carpet, together, forever, and then we'll sit back, relax, and wonder... why did we ever bother?..."
So yup. I don't know, man! Ummm I think I'm going to go do something. That chinese food just made me really want a nap though. HA I already did that. Hardxcore.
Guess what guys, I have an awesome third-grade style crush. It's terrific. I forgot how much fun these are! Tee fuckin' hee!
Aight. I CANNOT BELIEVE IT MOTHERFUCKING SNOWED IN VERMONT AND I MISSED IT! WAHHH. I guess it's supposed to snow a tad here tomorrow morning, but... meh, not the same!!! I miss me my Vermont weather sometimes. Haha I know I know, I'm only over in NY. BUT STILL.
Today is the first day I haven't really felt like crying at all. It was a shitty depressing day, but... it was good! Yeah! I love overcoming depression the natural way.
I hope Thursday won't bring all this goodness crashing down, shattering my bubble of chrystaline happiness with sadness... I have no control though. I just have to hope that everything will come out okay. Please?
Bye kiddos... have pleasantness... =]] Man I should nap like that more often.
xoxox. willaaaa.