♠ New life decides to come through the front door ♠ OPEN
Who: baratiesbest, prodigal_axe and dontcallmegol
Where: The Northern Lights
When: April 1st at 4:30ish? Shortly after he arrived.
Rating: PG-13 for language, suggestive themes, Pirates
Summary: Shinji offered Ace a few drinks at the Lights, without a second thought the man accepted and it's a rare thing for the blond NOT to be in the kitchen.
the log: ( Though I don't have much of a choice... )
Where: The Northern Lights
When: April 1st at 4:30ish? Shortly after he arrived.
Rating: PG-13 for language, suggestive themes, Pirates
Summary: Shinji offered Ace a few drinks at the Lights, without a second thought the man accepted and it's a rare thing for the blond NOT to be in the kitchen.
the log: ( Though I don't have much of a choice... )
But the bastard was really back, alive, in one piece if only for as long as he stayed in Discedo. Sanji hadn't gotten it confirmed yet but the sound of his voice, the way he acted... it was all too familiar. Bad news wrapped up in a happy reunion.
Despite all this he had decided to save the questioning for later once the fireuser got settled in again. Stick to the shitty banter and welcoming smiles for now and god damn he would be lying if he said that he wasn't happy to see him. There was a snarky comment ready and waiting on the tip of his tongue for when they finally met eye to eye again-
And then that moment came and every single coherent thought left the cooks brain, replaced by cold realization. He froze in the doorway, muscles going rigid for a good few seconds before he managed to pull himself together. That scar... fresh and raw and all kinds of bad news. He had suspected something but... this? Came as a surprise. He still managed to compose himself, fell into a nonchalant swagger as he made his way out into the dining area.
"Took you long enough. I almost thought that you forgot the way."
A lopsided smirk at that and maybe it was curiosity that guided his steps as he made his way past the other pirate in order to take a seat next to him. Whatever it was he almost regretted that decision once he got a clear view of his back and things started to add up - whatever happened back home it hadn't been pretty and there was no longer any doubt about the outcome.
But he didn't say anything, just slid down in the stool next to Ace and acted like nothing was out of the ordinary. Be prepared for some concerned sideways glances though, Firefist. There's a serious talk coming up later.
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But he was putting up a front, losing himself in the reunion and enjoying his second chance at life. It'd hit later, after the shock wore off and he was alone with his thoughts. Hell, he'd be lying if he wasn't thinking of it now. It was too fresh on his mind and still extremely confusing. But he wasn't one to look a gift horse in the mouth.
He clanked glasses with a nod and set to chugging his darkness brew, eyes falling closed as it burned. He set the glass on the bar with a satisfied sigh and reveled in the heat. That glorious familiar feeling. At one point it did hit his wounded esophagus and he fell into a small coughing fit. He wasn't expecting the pain after all and hadn't realize he still had some internal damage. After the initial hit it went numb though and the alcohol warmed him through and through. A little pain for a equal pleasure, it was well worth it.
Luckily for the blond he'd missed the tension, he'd been too busy curled in on himself and wracked with a cough. He caught his comment and glanced up to watch him swagger over. As the other passed behind him he did tense, shoulders and back going rigid, only then remembering that his back had to have a large scar just like his chest. He didn't honestly know what it looked like or how bad the mark must be, but he knew it had to be there considering how he'd been struck from behind.
"How could I forget?"
He still managed to turn toward the cook and offer him a warm smile, using his whole face and trying to hide the fact he knew what the other must be thinking. He was prepared for questions, he just hadn't been thinking to grab a jacket or shirt on the way.
He grinned then and glanced between the two men. "Don't suppose either of you have a spare jacket or shirt I could borrow huh?" He shuddered a little, wrapping his arms around himself and rubbing his arms for emphasis. "It's still kinda chilly, too much to walk around in my usual attire."
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With a quiet snort to himself, Shinjiro got up and arced his arms back, stretching his aching muscles. The late night training in the forest, coupled by lack of sleep and drinking was damned near wearing him out. Comfortably, at least. He took a last swig of his darkness beer and shot a glance between the blond cook and the oddly cheery pirate.
He frowned a little--hadn't missed that cough, and he still doubted that attitude somewhat. Even so, it reminded him of something, made him feel a little nostalgic for reasons he couldn't pin down. Or-- he thought, uneasily, glancing toward the front door now-- for reasons he didn't want to dredge up. A lot of his memories here weren't easy ones, even a few that seemed good at the time.
"Alright... I'll go dig something out of the back room. Should be a coat or two at least. Just make sure to take it with you. It's a hell of a lot warmer in here than outside."
He followed that up with an eyeroll. Hopefully, someone would take the hint and not end up with hypothermia later on. "Might take me a minute--might bring out some food, if either of you are even hungry."
And if not, he'd eat it himself, because he didn't feel like sticking around for an answer. Might as well go settle his mind and let these two talk alone for awhile. As long as he didn't come back to a brawl...
With a shrug, he put his hands in his pockets and headed back into the supply room.
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He did want to know though. Needed to, desperately. The past week had gone by in a daze and the blond was sick and tired of all this uncertainty. The vacant look in their Captain's eyes, the knot of ice in his own stomach that still wouldn't go away... they had to know. Now was as good a time as any.
It wasn't easy though, bringing it up and for a good few seconds Sanji didn't say a word. Simply glanced at the other from under the disheveled curtain of blond hair, brows furrowed in concern and when he finally did speak his voice was low and the words vague to say the least.
Word. He simply couldn't think of what to say.
"Well..?"
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He caught that distant nostalgic look in Shinji's eyes, brief as it was. He'd tuck it away in the back of his mind for later, maybe use it to change the subject off of him. Who knew? He also caught the small jab from the grumpy barkeep. He grinned somewhat sheepishly, rubbing the back of his neck. "Heh, yeah, I'll uh... definitely remember. Thanks Shinji, I appreciate it."
Once the man had left an unsettling silence fell over the two pirates. He shifted a little where he sat, trying to think of something to break the tension. It was unusual for him to stumble over striking up conversation, especially with the man he considered his best friend. He could feel his gaze upon him though. He waited, thinking and sipped his drink.
Finally when the blond spoke up all he could do was crack a little smile. But the expression seemed... off, the smile was empty. He knew what you were asking of him Sanji, but he was going to play dumb anyway.
"... well what?"
But this was Sanji. He'd practically told the man everything already? Why start hiding things now. The smile faltered then, unable to win out over his own logic. Alright blondie, you really want to know?
He sat silently staring at his glass, rubbing his thumb over the surface a moment. He swallowed, expression now taking on a more serious and distant sort of look. Finally his eyes broke away to look down at his chest, moving a hand to press over the fresh scar. It still felt hot to the touch to him... but it could have just been his mind playing tricks.
"..." Where should he even start? How do you tell someone you died when you barely grasped the concept yourself? "...I'm curious... You have to suspect something." He finally began, turning his gaze to the blond with another small, empty smile. It was all a cover of course, but he was letting Sanji see through it, it was all he could do, the only way he could react. "...What do you think the outcome was?"
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It was exactly the same thing.
You couldn't just come back from something like this, he knew that much. You shouldn't have to, back home death was permanent but here... you had to deal, even though you couldn't do much more than push it to the back of your head and try to forget. The blond had been drowning in his own blood, not once but twice and even though the mark was long gone he still found himself tracing the invisible line along his throat.
It wasn't the same, but at the same time it was. Ace was back from the dead but only for the duration of his stay in Discedo and in a way... that made it easier to relate to. Different, but not as different as you might think. He knew, maybe a little too well.
A sigh, blue eyes shifting back to stare at the counter. What the hell was he supposed to say..? Wishful thinking, that was what they had been clinging to and with Ace back every shred of hope for a different outcome was gone.
"...I think I know. Shit."
There wasn't really any need for a great explanation or a blow-by-blow recap. This was all he needed to know, the rest wasn't important. They couldn't change it, any of it just like they couldn't stop the execution or change the way the world worked back home while they were stuck here. It was crippling, this feeling of helplessness but maybe there was still something they could do, no matter how small...
Sanji looked back up at Ace, a small smile playing at the corner of his mouth. He understood. He got it. He was still here and he'd be damned if he'd let this crush the fireuser.
"It's good to have you back." Pause. "And if there's anything... shit, you know all that already."
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He cleared his throat and stared at the bar a moment, thinking. He...may as well start from the beginning, get it all out, catch Sanji up to the present.
"... They told the world about me ya know? Bastards didn't get enough just putting me on display at Marineford. Sengoku decided he'd explain the reason behind it all, tell them who I really was. How Whitebeard knew, how HE knew, apparently pops wanted to make me King all along and protected me..." He shook his head, "I wouldn't believe it. But that's why they wanted my head, even knowing the war it would bring upon the world."
He hung his head in shame, an odd little smile twisted over his features, even if he wasn't happy. No, he wasn't proud of any of it at all. It was his fault, his own weakness that caused this. His blood, his cursed blood condemned him and his family to this.
His shoulders shook with an uneasy chuckle. He didn't forget Shinji was about, let him walk in on this, it didn't matter anymore. "...Me. I'm nothing special... just-- Just this damn blood of mine. Damn it all...If-- If I hadn't--" He swallowed, his throat raw. Shit, there it was, the waves of emotion breaking against his chest. But he kept it together, they'd been through this already hadn't they?
"The war...I knew, I just knew it was going to be huge, but somehow it still surprised me. It's not like I don't know Pops' fleet or allies and their numbers. But there were others... Luffy arrived with Crocodile and several inmates from Impel Down to join the fray."
He swallowed once more, eyes closing as he remembered everything, brow furrowing as he paused to recollect. Whitebeard, his brothers, they knew the truth and yet lied to save face for him. His existence laid bare before the world, his blood revealed, it'd been enough of a low blow. He watched them struggle all over again, saw Oars Jr. fall, and Gramps... the tears in his eyes, how disappointed he was. He tried, they all had tried to protect him. Dark eyes opened again as he continued. "...I tried to turn him away, told him to go home...but do you think he listens to me?" A dry chuckle. "...that idiot. I don't even know how they managed to get there in the first place."
A concerned look to Sanji, "...but, you and the rest of his crew weren't there."
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And there it was, the thing he had both hoped for and dreaded. It wasn't like he didn't want to know but at the same time he was getting sick and tired of sitting back like this. Waiting... always waiting, useless, unable to protect anyone. This was the second time one of his best friends had gone off to die, only this time he didn't miraculously make it out alive. Nothing could change this, Sanji knew this perfectly well but getting the details...
It hurt. Not because it happened but rather because he couldn't even lift a finger to try and prevent it. Hell, back home he would barely know who Ace was.
But he listened, silent, hanging onto every word. Catching the twists in the mans voice, the way he stopped and started, struggled to keep himself together. It was... just like that night, wasn't it? When he first told him about the blood that coarsed through his veins, only so much stronger because this time he actually did pay for it. No idealistic speeches could make this even a little bit better because the world had already spoken.
Yes. It was a sin to be born.
Nothing he could say so he listened, shoulders growing ever more tense with every passing second. This wasn't right, none of it and he'd much rather just get the hell out and kick things until the world got turned around to how it should be. But... nothing.
The mention of Luffy brought out a frown on the cooks face. Another thing he knew although he shouldn't - Luffy had been there, the Captain had said as much himself and with the way everything unfolded... shit. Knowing Luffy they'd be glad to even get him back alive after a stunt like that but losing Ace... there was no telling what would happen.
"Tch. That guy... nothing is impossible for him. He just doesn't stop."
Well... almost nothing but like hell he'd start making compromises in a situation like this. He met that look though, blue eyes searching those dark pools.
"...yeah, I know. Chopper filled me in. We..." Pause to clear his throat. He wasn't there yet, this wasn't something he was even supposed to talk about.
"Kuma caught up with us. We got separated... that's all I know."
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Sanji's words had him pause, slowly lowering his now empty mug to the bar. "Kuma?" His brows furrowed, remembering the mechanical copies of the shichibukai. "... you sure it was really him? Doflamingo said he was dead." He frowned. "Even though he--or rather, several versions of him were lined up like toy soldiers taking down anyone who was trying to storm the base." Along with countless marines.
"Shit, Akainu... that damn bastard." His fingers clenched into tight fists on the bar top. "... he's the real problem. He turned one of our own on pops. It was clever, I'll give'em that."
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"Chopper said we fought three of him before..."
He trailed off for a moment, eyes moving back to gaze aimlessly at the counter. The little reindeer hadn't been able to say what happened then, just that it wasn't good and he didn't know the outcome. For all Sanji knew they could be dead by the time Chopper woke up alone on that island, or maybe they were just separated after all. It didn't add up yet, especially not now when he was once again the one left behind in their timeline. But none of that mattered right now, not Thriller Bark, not Sabaody - there were more important things to deal with.
His eyes widened slightly at the mention of the Marine Admiral. He'd heard of him, of course, even met one of his colleagues but that was about as far as his knowledge went. Bad news either way and his voice softened slightly, urging the fireuser on. Continue by all means, there wasn't much Sanji could do right now but add some fodder to the conversation.
"Akainu..? One of the Admirals? Fucking hell..."
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"...Akainu convinced Squardo that Pops sold them all out to the Marines. They even had the battalions attacking certain fleets, leaving Marco, Whitebeard and a few others untouched. Akainu was using Squardo's hatred of Roger to sway him, knowing he'd have never allied himself with us had he found out I was..." He drifted, still finding it hard to even utter the truth. It just left a bad taste in his mouth and never seemed to fit right.
His brow furrowed, eyes locked on the bar top as he let his mind race. He recounted everything he could remember, just letting it all spill from his lips. How Garp joined him, what happened to Oars, Luffy's struggle and those he'd allied himself with. Any details of the war he took in while watching helplessly from the podium.
"I still can't believe he punched Gramps. It was amazing." He chuckled, shaking his head. "But he did it. He got to me in time, managed to get the cuffs off and we fought our way back to Pops and the others."
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The mention of Roger and Ace's heritage pushed his thoughts back to the conversation they'd had months ago, back in the attic in Gohl. This wasn't so far from it, was it? Something of the past that needed to be said even though there wasn't a thing either of them could do to change it. It was just a matter of time, the story would eventually lead up to the inevitable end and all he could do was listen. Fit the pieces of the puzzle together with his own half-baked theories to form some sort of crude full picture of the events.
It came as more of a surprise than he thought it would. Of course Luffy would make it, there had never been any doubts about that. It was what he did, that reckless captain of theirs. Still... if he got to Ace in time... what the hell had happened to twist their victory out of reach like that?
Keeping his eyes trained on the fellow pirate Sanji remained silent, brows furrowed in concentration and - he had to admit - worry.
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He swallowed, smile slipping, head bowing slightly letting his bangs fall into his face. Somehow, that grin grew over his lips, spreading out over his face. He wasn't happy to say any of what would come out of his mouth, it was simply the will of D.
"...I'm a damn fool Sanji." He lifted a hand to his face, resting his forehead in his palm. "That damn Sakazuki. He got to me. I had my freedom, I should have listened to Pops and just... escaped with Luffy."
His fingers curled into his bangs, twisting them into his fist tightly. "He said Pops was a failure, he insulted every one of us and all we stood for. That bastard knew..." He turned his head, pressing the heel of his palm to his eyes. The corners of that grin did falter, jaw clenching. "...shit." He was kicking himself for being so weak.
He swallowed once more and leveled out his voice. "I attacked him. You'd think I could bear it, his fire versus mine. But... he burned me Sanji." He lifted his head then and looked right at him, locking on those blues. There was pain behind them, his soul was bare in his gaze. "Then the bastard went after Luffy."
There was an ominous sort of air, a weight that rolled in over him and his shoulders slumped as he shook his head, gaze falling once more. "...I couldn't let him take my little brother. I didn't even think twice about my actions."
Absently his hand pressed over his sternum again, remembering, feeling the searing heat being slammed through his back to exit his chest. He recalled thinking... so this is what it feels like? Being burned, feeling his breath slip away, his heart struggle to continue on. "...I took the blow instead and protected Luffy from the Red Dog's Magma Fist."
His hand fell to his lap as if the weight of a seastone cuff was still attached. He felt weak all over again, like his life was slipping away. The utter despair of defeat. He thought he'd never see Luffy again. Hell, he didn't even know for sure if the boy made it out alive.
A coma...something, Croc had said he'd lost his mind, that alone was barely living. And his brothers, his father, what of them? Whitebeard had been stabbed and shot more than any normal man could withstand, he lost part of his skull and still fought on. The man, his father... no one cold ever measure up to his greatness. No one would ever understand. He had to believe in their strength.
But it'd been his fault, all his fault that the war happened, that his family had to suffer and that he was lost in the end despite all their struggles. He was a damn fool.
His head dropped to his palm again feeling the familiar sting. And his mouth twisted upward into that Gol grin. "...at least... I managed to say good bye and thank them for loving me for who I was."
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Not this time.
Back home he would never have been able to understand this, ignoring the fact that he wouldn't have been able to hear it in the first place. It was so utterly foreign and it didn't matter how close you'd been to your own death - experiencing it was something completely different. Here though... he got it. It wasn't the same, that was something that kept on repeating in the back of his head but it was still close enough and he knew how difficult it was to deal with it. Or not deal with it at all, as the case might be.
Words didn't help. They might make the whole thing easier to grasp or sooth the pain for a moment but at the end of the day they didn't help one bit. The hole in your heart, the blank spot in your mind, the chill down your spine... things you couldn't understand unless you'd already experienced it yourself and then there was no need for an explanation. He didn't get the situation, could only imagine it in as vivid detail as his imagination allowed him to but that one detail he did understand perfectly.
One life for another. Sacrifices. Gratitude, for coming this far. For being accepted.
The cook remained silent, seconds passing by into minutes as blue eyes remained fixed on that pained expression. The unnatural twist to the fireusers mouth that didn't match up with the words that came spilling out of it. Nothing could make this go away, or even make it seem bearable. Not now, maybe not for a good long while but still... there were things he could still do. Small things, things he'd already done once before in a dark, damp attic a lifetime ago.
A heartbeat. Two. A low, shaky sigh and then he shifted in a little closer, one arm coming up to wrap around Ace's shoulders, slender fingers accidentally brushing against the top edge of that fresh scar. He didn't say a word, couldn't, simply tugged the other man into this awkward, one-armed hug.
What else could he do..?
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Luffy had gotten to the bar, more alert than hyper when he heard Ace's voice again... and shoved open the door open to hear that last line. Crocodile had told him that Ace had died, but Luffy was more than adamant to believe his nakama when they told him not to listen to him. After all, this was the most important battle of his life, of Ace's life actually, especially now...
But...
Did he lose? These words Ace had just uttered, did Luffy honestly lose his brother in that fight? Luffy had actually frozen in the doorway, eyes shocked and wide, hand gripping the handle so tightly his knuckles were turning white. The young captain was having difficulty comprehending this. Sure, he had lost fights before, when it came to the first battle with Crocodile and every match with Ace, and even that one with Kuma. But in Marineford, the Whitebeard pirates were helping him, escaped convicts, even Hancock had done her share. He just couldn't have lost that. But to hear that he had, from Ace's own lips--
No, Ace was sitting right there at the bar. Scarred and unhappy but right there. Sitting. Breathing. Alive. Through whatever mystery shit the scientists did, Ace wasn't dead. He couldn't be... Luffy didn't know what to think anymore. He just stood, frozen in the doorway, hoping that Ace would laugh it off and say everything worked out, that everything would be fine.
Yet he had a sinking feeling that it wasn't. And that just made him feel sick.
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The silence was shattered when his brother's voice reached his ears and his eyes shot open wide. Shit, he forgot the boy was coming too. This... wasn't exactly how he meant for things to progress but he'd have told the young captain eventually.
He shifted his gaze to the lanky pirate standing in the doorway, taking in the sight of him and the tension in his form. "Luffy..."
But he was in too much shock, he honestly thought he'd never see the boy again. He broke contact with the blond slowly. Sure he'd heard Luffy's voice over the communicator, but there was just something about seeing him in person that made that much more of an impact.
He stood, moving across the floor as if he'd never walked before, carefully picking up his pace till he stood before the young pirate. He then scooped the boy into one of the most furious hugs he'd ever given someone. No offense Sanji, he was really glad to see you too. But... man, he owed Luffy so much. Hell, he even forgot the boy wasn't rubber, lets hope he didn't break any ribs.
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