(no subject)
Two-Minute Battles, 2014 August 30.
You are fine, and then, all of a sudden, you're not.
Your chest starts hurting. Your heart starts pounding. Your eyes start burning. Your head starts clouding. Your hands start moving on their own-just shaking at first, and then the right one reaching for a pair of scissors despite your own mouth screaming no you shouldn't you shouldn't YOU SHOULDN'T and before you know it, your thumb is playing with the tips of the blades. It frightens you, and you drop the scissors next to your feet, but you can't stop eyeing them, and your hands, your traitorous hands, start to reach out again. You force yourself to grab your phone instead and, with fingers trembling, ask a friend to tell me not to do it, please, because you don't want to do it. Not again. You wrap your arms around your legs and bury your head between your knees, curling into yourself, shutting everything out, wanting to just disappear.
You're not fine, and then, all of a sudden, you are.
But even with no new battle wounds this time, you still feel a sense of defeat. You can't win all your battles, not even those that last for just two minutes.
You are fine, and then, all of a sudden, you're not.
Your chest starts hurting. Your heart starts pounding. Your eyes start burning. Your head starts clouding. Your hands start moving on their own-just shaking at first, and then the right one reaching for a pair of scissors despite your own mouth screaming no you shouldn't you shouldn't YOU SHOULDN'T and before you know it, your thumb is playing with the tips of the blades. It frightens you, and you drop the scissors next to your feet, but you can't stop eyeing them, and your hands, your traitorous hands, start to reach out again. You force yourself to grab your phone instead and, with fingers trembling, ask a friend to tell me not to do it, please, because you don't want to do it. Not again. You wrap your arms around your legs and bury your head between your knees, curling into yourself, shutting everything out, wanting to just disappear.
You're not fine, and then, all of a sudden, you are.
But even with no new battle wounds this time, you still feel a sense of defeat. You can't win all your battles, not even those that last for just two minutes.