May 18, 2006 18:22
You sink into my clothes
And this invasion
Makes me feel
Worthless, hopeless, sick
I'm so sick,
Infected with where I live
Let me live without this
Empty bliss,
Selfishness
I'm so sick
I just broke up with Mike via Myspace message because I cannot gather the courage to call him, I know I'd end up sobbing again. Why does it hurt so much? And this was only short term. I'd hate to see me break up a long term relationship, probably go mental. I hate myself and I feel horrible. My mother expressed her intense dislike for him. I could see that coming from my dad, but it was a shock coming from her. She doesnt like the three year age difference. She doesnt like where he lives in pontiac. She doesnt like his appearance. She doesnt like the fact he didnt finish high school. Before I made the decision to break up with him, she even said she didnt want him at my open house because of what their friends and my family would think or say. I dont even care anymore. I'm a confirmed bachlorette. I dont want to deal with everyone's opinions and I dont want to deal with breaking this shit off. I just dont care anymore. I feel empty inside, my heart hurts and I'm physically sick. He was much of what I always wanted. I really hate myself right now. UGH! I just had to let something out...If I call anyone to actually talk about it I'll cry again. I'm so emotional!