naive as manure
its an anagram. you figure it out. i have a sleeping disorder. if only it were narcolepsy. if only. it troubles me that i cannot control my dreams and that i have no idea how those particular dreamie neurons fire in my brain. is there a constant movie going on behind my eyes that i am not aware of when awake? how am i seeing these things withmy eyes closed? how am i seeing anything at all, much less evil surgeons in clown masks brandishing twisted coathangers? i also have yet to find the perfect position to sleep in. cant fall asleep on my back, obviously, i mean, all the vital organs are exposed, and anyone could sneak up and stab me with a knife. anyone at all. cant sleep on my side because one side of me is unprotected. cant sleep on my stomach because it would be childishly easy to jump on my back, grab my hair, and slit my throat. i have finally decided on fetal position with my back scooted up against the wall and a butterfly knife in my hand under the pillow. and even then i lay awake because ive noticed that i MOVE AROUND IN MY SLEEP AND WAKE UP IN DIFFERENT POSITIONS WITHOUT MY KNOWLEDGE OR CONSENT. spooky shit, man. spooooky.