hmmm
this is going to be long...heartfelt...and muchy...for those of u who arent into that stufff...u might wanna skip this entry
i lost the most important thing in the world yesterday...jay...of course it was my fault and i would take it all back if i could, i just feel that he deserves a better girlfriend than me, someone who doesnt treat him like shit and fights with him all the time like over food and stupid things like that...he deserves a girl who will give him what he wants when he needs it...someone who will stand outside of his car within the first few months of dating...in the pouring rain to help him put transmission fluid in his car, he needs someone who is going to laugh at his giddyness when he is happy, he needs someone whos going to give him a back rub to make him fall asleep, and someone who isnt going to run away when he farts haha...he needs someone who is going to sit on the staircase in their hallway and end with a sound going **splat**, he should have someone whos willing to buy him a laptop or a body kit for his birthday because that what he wants, and if she doesnt get it for him, he would be happy that she tried, he needs someone to snuggle with at night when hes lonely, and he needs someone who has a car so he doesnt have to drive her home late at night *5 am*, he needs someone who can play pump with him and bet him for sex and acctually give it to him when she loses to let the sunshine which is her song, he needs someone who would try to drive home on their anniversary which is 2 hrs away from him to try and do anything she can to surprise him, he needs someone who would dye their hair brown and straighten it for him just because he has never seen it like that, he needs someone whos going to get excited just for standing in time square, and someone who would laugh with him in a comedy club (she might need some cranberry juice), and he needs someone who will stand online with him for 45 min at wendys with indian babies running around just to get food and to find out there is a homeless woman in the bathroom washing her hair, he needs somone he can talk to about all the things that are on his mind, like his dreams, his pain, anything...he needs someone who can watch a booger fall out of his nose while hes drinking a milkshake and not run away in disgust, he needs somone who can playfight with him and acctually let him win...he needs someone whos mother would ask a random question or say something random like "does anyone want a plum" or "he trimmed his ball hair" or something along those lines, he needs someone who is willing to sleep in the car with them when he visits her at school, and he needs someone who will eat a burger and get sick infront of him, someone who wont hold it back cause she is afraid to disgust him, and someone who would cheer him on while he is singing You got it bad by usher during karaoke, and someone who will respect him for forcing himself to eat just because her parents want him to, he needs someone who is going to call z100 a million times on her cell phone just to try and get hiim jay z tickets, he needs someone who will be surprised about going to the prom, and someone who will rent 2 movies, 1 which was a 2 day rental and one which was a week and keep them both for a week, only watch one of them, then have to return them and pay a 24 dollar late fee, he needs someone he can lay naked with after sex and wouldnt feel uncomfortable, he needs someone who would rub his feet, and someone who would tell him how much she loves his smile, he needs someone who could kiss him every time like it may be his last, and someone who he can cry with, and someone that he can watch all the chick flicks in the world with, and go to the movies once or twice a weekend, he needs someone who will try to look her best for him even when she breaks out, someone who will go to pepboys with him and feel amazing because u feel like ur grown up together, and someone who wants to get an apartment with him and have a daughter named jada marie and a son named scott, and even if she doesnt have a boy and a girl she would be happy anyway that they have beautiful intelligent children, and someone who will love him for all the little things he does and like all the little things in this journal entry that she would do for him as well, she would love him through all the tough, bad things that were said, because she knows that he loves her more than his own life, someone who can just stare into his eyes forever because all she can see from them is the love that he has for her...he just needs someone who will love him...when u find a girl like that for him, lt me know...because i found one who sounds like she would be willing to go through all of this once, twice or even three times to make things work, and she is waiting for the day he will see her for all the good, instead of all the bad and the pain she has caused
i lost the most important thing in the world yesterday...jay...of course it was my fault and i would take it all back if i could, i just feel that he deserves a better girlfriend than me, someone who doesnt treat him like shit and fights with him all the time like over food and stupid things like that...he deserves a girl who will give him what he wants when he needs it...someone who will stand outside of his car within the first few months of dating...in the pouring rain to help him put transmission fluid in his car, he needs someone who is going to laugh at his giddyness when he is happy, he needs someone whos going to give him a back rub to make him fall asleep, and someone who isnt going to run away when he farts haha...he needs someone who is going to sit on the staircase in their hallway and end with a sound going **splat**, he should have someone whos willing to buy him a laptop or a body kit for his birthday because that what he wants, and if she doesnt get it for him, he would be happy that she tried, he needs someone to snuggle with at night when hes lonely, and he needs someone who has a car so he doesnt have to drive her home late at night *5 am*, he needs someone who can play pump with him and bet him for sex and acctually give it to him when she loses to let the sunshine which is her song, he needs someone who would try to drive home on their anniversary which is 2 hrs away from him to try and do anything she can to surprise him, he needs someone who would dye their hair brown and straighten it for him just because he has never seen it like that, he needs someone whos going to get excited just for standing in time square, and someone who would laugh with him in a comedy club (she might need some cranberry juice), and he needs someone who will stand online with him for 45 min at wendys with indian babies running around just to get food and to find out there is a homeless woman in the bathroom washing her hair, he needs somone he can talk to about all the things that are on his mind, like his dreams, his pain, anything...he needs someone who can watch a booger fall out of his nose while hes drinking a milkshake and not run away in disgust, he needs somone who can playfight with him and acctually let him win...he needs someone whos mother would ask a random question or say something random like "does anyone want a plum" or "he trimmed his ball hair" or something along those lines, he needs someone who is willing to sleep in the car with them when he visits her at school, and he needs someone who will eat a burger and get sick infront of him, someone who wont hold it back cause she is afraid to disgust him, and someone who would cheer him on while he is singing You got it bad by usher during karaoke, and someone who will respect him for forcing himself to eat just because her parents want him to, he needs someone who is going to call z100 a million times on her cell phone just to try and get hiim jay z tickets, he needs someone who will be surprised about going to the prom, and someone who will rent 2 movies, 1 which was a 2 day rental and one which was a week and keep them both for a week, only watch one of them, then have to return them and pay a 24 dollar late fee, he needs someone he can lay naked with after sex and wouldnt feel uncomfortable, he needs someone who would rub his feet, and someone who would tell him how much she loves his smile, he needs someone who could kiss him every time like it may be his last, and someone who he can cry with, and someone that he can watch all the chick flicks in the world with, and go to the movies once or twice a weekend, he needs someone who will try to look her best for him even when she breaks out, someone who will go to pepboys with him and feel amazing because u feel like ur grown up together, and someone who wants to get an apartment with him and have a daughter named jada marie and a son named scott, and even if she doesnt have a boy and a girl she would be happy anyway that they have beautiful intelligent children, and someone who will love him for all the little things he does and like all the little things in this journal entry that she would do for him as well, she would love him through all the tough, bad things that were said, because she knows that he loves her more than his own life, someone who can just stare into his eyes forever because all she can see from them is the love that he has for her...he just needs someone who will love him...when u find a girl like that for him, lt me know...because i found one who sounds like she would be willing to go through all of this once, twice or even three times to make things work, and she is waiting for the day he will see her for all the good, instead of all the bad and the pain she has caused