Atomic [Heroes]
Title: Atomic
Characters/Pairings: Gretchen/Claire
Rating: PG
Warnings: Some kinda gross imagery at one part, but otherwise nuffingk. Well, except the whole pretty lesbian thing.
Summary: She thinks that if Claire could get hurt, maybe she could be the one to hold her and comfort her until the pain goes away. But she can't, so that's that.
A/N superkappa requested Gretchen and Claire fic for Chreestmas. Specifically, fluff. Aaaand yeah this got a little angsty too, I'm sorry. But it's not sad, I don't think! Hope you like it anyway! *nervous*
Atomic
Gretchen likes watching Claire.
It isn’t just some sort of weird obsession, or because she’s pretty. Of course, she is pretty, especially when she has just rolled out of bed, her hair tangled and matted from the way she tosses and turns every night, tiny whimpering sounds waking Gretchen up in the middle of the night. Gretchen was always pretty sure she was having nightmares, and she was also pretty sure that she would have given anything to jump in her dreams and tell her everything was going to be okay. She deserves it, you know? Calm. The fact that she couldn’t even get peace in her dreams made her sad, until Claire would wake up the next morning and throw a crooked smile her way. Then everything would suddenly seem okay.
So yeah, she’s pretty. But it isn’t the only reason she watches her.
She wants Claire to feel normal, be normal. Most of all, she wants to be able to see Claire as normal, wants to be able to look at her and just see her pretty roommate with a disarming smile and bed head and pretty white teeth. But the scientist in her, the inquisitor, that part won’t give up. It keeps picking at her brain, and instead of just blond hair sitting pretty on her shoulders she instead imagines what would happen if she grabbed it and ripped it out. Would it grow back? And instead of white teeth forming the prettiest smile she’s ever seen, she wants to see bleeding, empty gums fill anew again over and over. Soft tan skin makes her wonder if she could lay out in the sun for days and never change color.
So she blinks hard, and instead of blood and twisting sinew knitting itself back together she tries to just see Claire. Beautiful, untouchable, human Claire.
&&
Two days later they’re sitting on the floor of their dorm room, staring at a blank empty concrete wall, the radiator shuddering and spewing out lukewarm air as the pair tries to warm their toes.
Gretchen pushes her toes against the metal of the radiator, desperate for more warmth. But it burns, far hotter than the air it’s providing, and she gasps as she pulls her toes away. Claire just stares for a moment before giggling and placing her toes against the heat, sighing contentedly as her skin blisters red.
Face blushing and blood boiling Gretchen looks away, because she thinks that if Claire could get hurt maybe she could be the one to hold her and comfort her until the pain goes away. But she can’t be, so that’s that.
“You know what I used to love doing?” Claire asks simply, staring straight ahead of her.
Gretchen shakes her head. "What's that?"
"It's so dumb and ordinary," she begins, chewing the inside of her lip, before letting out a little sigh. "You'll think it's silly. But I really miss just sitting in front of the fireplace, drinking hot chocolate, getting all warm and cuddly 'cause it was so cold out with my friends or parents or whoever," she says dreamily. "Well, as cold as Texas gets in the winter, anyway," she shrugs, looking out the window. "This place, on the other hand, is brutal."
"Yeah," Gretchen agrees, mulling her thoughts over in her head. "This radiator doesn't quite cut it, does it?"
Claire smiles tightly, nodding, but her face looks sadder than someone who's only upset because they have a crappy radiator. "Not so much," she whispers, looking at Gretchen. "I guess I just miss everything like it was, more than anything. But that’s all gone now,” she finishes, punctuating her sentence by exploding her fists as a quiet ‘boom’ escapes her lips.
Boom, indeed.
&&
They do their homework together sometimes, even if they’re not in the same classes. Gretchen has always had an analytical mind, and she likes helping Claire.
“Claire,” she says gently to pull her out of her thoughts, “do you want to try it now?” she continues, pointing to the equation on the paper. “It’s pretty easy.”
Laughing a little, Claire shakes her head and gives her a wry smile, “Yeah, for you, brainiac.”
“No, really,” Gretchen replies quickly and lightly, pushing the pencil towards her. “You can totally do it.”
Claire pretends she doesn’t understand and waves away the pencil, but Gretchen thinks she just doesn’t really care that much anymore. She just stares at the paper when Gretchen explains the equations to her, and she figures she might as well be talking to a wall.
She’ll cheer up Claire, she will; she’ll just need to sleep on it. Yeah.
&&
When Claire walks into her dorm room after her last class the next day she gasps softly, a knowing smile spreading across her face. Up against the ineffective heater are seven or eight candles lined up like ducks in a row, flames flickering and casting the only light in the room.
Gretchen waits patiently on her bed with a sheepish smile on her face and two mugs in her hands. “Hi Claire.”
“Gretch…” she says, walking over to her bed and throwing her bag down before walking over to the candles. She kneels down and stares at the flames, so Gretchen takes this as her cue and kneels down next to her. She hands her a mug, and Claire whispers a quiet and sincere, “Thank you.”
“Nah…” Gretchen says, waving her free hand to dismiss her statement. “I miss this too, with my family and friends and stuff, so I thought it would just be fun, you know?” she says, and searches Claire’s face for a response. “Right?”
Claire nods, pursing her lips. She then drops one hand from her mug and waves her fingers over the flames, too close, and her skin blisters and heals over and over and Gretchen can’t help but be enthralled by the sick, well, beauty of it. Claire’s power is beautiful, it really is.
A little sound escapes Claire’s throat and Gretchen is thrown out of her reverie. Looking over at Claire, she notices wetness against her cheeks and a tear dripping from her chin. She then sniffles a little, shaking her head as she brings her hand to her face, and as she wipes her cheeks she leaves soft grey lines, ash and smoke smearing her pretty tan skin.
Gretchen feels a little ashamed, mostly for having not even noticed Claire was crying because she was too interested in her power, and also because she isn’t sure how to proceed. “You,” she begins, and waits for Claire to turn her attention to her before continuing, “you okay?”
She nods a little to quickly and plasters a fake smile on her face, before settling back and sitting down. Gretchen nods in response, even if she doesn’t believe her, and sits back as well.
“It just sucks,” Claire says simply, and shakes her head before taking a sip of her hot chocolate. “Nothing ever stays, does it?”
Gretchen shrugs. “You do,” she replies simply, and Claire cringes a little. “I just mean…” she stutters, unsure of her next move, “I just mean, for me, you’re always there, you know? And from now on, yeah, I’ll always be here for you, okay?”
Claire’s expression warms and she smiles, this time a real one, and tears start to sparkle in her eyes as she leans over and rests her head on Gretchen’s shoulder, sighing deeply.
She can barely contain the stupid grin that spreads across her face and hopes Claire can’t hear her heart getting ready to beat out of her chest. It feels good, sitting like this, and Gretchen realizes she finally got what she wanted; Claire is hurting, and she’s the one here to pick up the pieces.
Somehow, though, it doesn’t feel as nice as she thought it would. She finds herself wishing instead that Claire’s power would heal up everything about her, not just her skin and bones and teeth but that part of her inside her that’s ripped in two and slowly bleeding out, so that she won’t feel this kind of pain anymore. Thinks one day it might happen, but that then she probably won’t feel anything at all. But that’s not worth worrying about, Gretchen guesses, ‘cause by the time that happens she’ll be long gone anyway. Ashes to ashes, and all that.
But for now they’re here, together, and it’s good. Just two normal girls having hot chocolate and trying to warm themselves by the fire, right?
Her left hand falls from her cup and grazes Claire’s, and her breath catches in her throat as she braces for the moment when Claire pulls her hand away. But she doesn’t move away, just lets their fingers graze until she grasps Gretchen’s hand. She strokes her fingers for a few moments, tickling, and when she finally intertwines her fingers with Gretchen’s, it’s like, boom.
Characters/Pairings: Gretchen/Claire
Rating: PG
Warnings: Some kinda gross imagery at one part, but otherwise nuffingk. Well, except the whole pretty lesbian thing.
Summary: She thinks that if Claire could get hurt, maybe she could be the one to hold her and comfort her until the pain goes away. But she can't, so that's that.
A/N superkappa requested Gretchen and Claire fic for Chreestmas. Specifically, fluff. Aaaand yeah this got a little angsty too, I'm sorry. But it's not sad, I don't think! Hope you like it anyway! *nervous*
Atomic
Gretchen likes watching Claire.
It isn’t just some sort of weird obsession, or because she’s pretty. Of course, she is pretty, especially when she has just rolled out of bed, her hair tangled and matted from the way she tosses and turns every night, tiny whimpering sounds waking Gretchen up in the middle of the night. Gretchen was always pretty sure she was having nightmares, and she was also pretty sure that she would have given anything to jump in her dreams and tell her everything was going to be okay. She deserves it, you know? Calm. The fact that she couldn’t even get peace in her dreams made her sad, until Claire would wake up the next morning and throw a crooked smile her way. Then everything would suddenly seem okay.
So yeah, she’s pretty. But it isn’t the only reason she watches her.
She wants Claire to feel normal, be normal. Most of all, she wants to be able to see Claire as normal, wants to be able to look at her and just see her pretty roommate with a disarming smile and bed head and pretty white teeth. But the scientist in her, the inquisitor, that part won’t give up. It keeps picking at her brain, and instead of just blond hair sitting pretty on her shoulders she instead imagines what would happen if she grabbed it and ripped it out. Would it grow back? And instead of white teeth forming the prettiest smile she’s ever seen, she wants to see bleeding, empty gums fill anew again over and over. Soft tan skin makes her wonder if she could lay out in the sun for days and never change color.
So she blinks hard, and instead of blood and twisting sinew knitting itself back together she tries to just see Claire. Beautiful, untouchable, human Claire.
&&
Two days later they’re sitting on the floor of their dorm room, staring at a blank empty concrete wall, the radiator shuddering and spewing out lukewarm air as the pair tries to warm their toes.
Gretchen pushes her toes against the metal of the radiator, desperate for more warmth. But it burns, far hotter than the air it’s providing, and she gasps as she pulls her toes away. Claire just stares for a moment before giggling and placing her toes against the heat, sighing contentedly as her skin blisters red.
Face blushing and blood boiling Gretchen looks away, because she thinks that if Claire could get hurt maybe she could be the one to hold her and comfort her until the pain goes away. But she can’t be, so that’s that.
“You know what I used to love doing?” Claire asks simply, staring straight ahead of her.
Gretchen shakes her head. "What's that?"
"It's so dumb and ordinary," she begins, chewing the inside of her lip, before letting out a little sigh. "You'll think it's silly. But I really miss just sitting in front of the fireplace, drinking hot chocolate, getting all warm and cuddly 'cause it was so cold out with my friends or parents or whoever," she says dreamily. "Well, as cold as Texas gets in the winter, anyway," she shrugs, looking out the window. "This place, on the other hand, is brutal."
"Yeah," Gretchen agrees, mulling her thoughts over in her head. "This radiator doesn't quite cut it, does it?"
Claire smiles tightly, nodding, but her face looks sadder than someone who's only upset because they have a crappy radiator. "Not so much," she whispers, looking at Gretchen. "I guess I just miss everything like it was, more than anything. But that’s all gone now,” she finishes, punctuating her sentence by exploding her fists as a quiet ‘boom’ escapes her lips.
Boom, indeed.
&&
They do their homework together sometimes, even if they’re not in the same classes. Gretchen has always had an analytical mind, and she likes helping Claire.
“Claire,” she says gently to pull her out of her thoughts, “do you want to try it now?” she continues, pointing to the equation on the paper. “It’s pretty easy.”
Laughing a little, Claire shakes her head and gives her a wry smile, “Yeah, for you, brainiac.”
“No, really,” Gretchen replies quickly and lightly, pushing the pencil towards her. “You can totally do it.”
Claire pretends she doesn’t understand and waves away the pencil, but Gretchen thinks she just doesn’t really care that much anymore. She just stares at the paper when Gretchen explains the equations to her, and she figures she might as well be talking to a wall.
She’ll cheer up Claire, she will; she’ll just need to sleep on it. Yeah.
&&
When Claire walks into her dorm room after her last class the next day she gasps softly, a knowing smile spreading across her face. Up against the ineffective heater are seven or eight candles lined up like ducks in a row, flames flickering and casting the only light in the room.
Gretchen waits patiently on her bed with a sheepish smile on her face and two mugs in her hands. “Hi Claire.”
“Gretch…” she says, walking over to her bed and throwing her bag down before walking over to the candles. She kneels down and stares at the flames, so Gretchen takes this as her cue and kneels down next to her. She hands her a mug, and Claire whispers a quiet and sincere, “Thank you.”
“Nah…” Gretchen says, waving her free hand to dismiss her statement. “I miss this too, with my family and friends and stuff, so I thought it would just be fun, you know?” she says, and searches Claire’s face for a response. “Right?”
Claire nods, pursing her lips. She then drops one hand from her mug and waves her fingers over the flames, too close, and her skin blisters and heals over and over and Gretchen can’t help but be enthralled by the sick, well, beauty of it. Claire’s power is beautiful, it really is.
A little sound escapes Claire’s throat and Gretchen is thrown out of her reverie. Looking over at Claire, she notices wetness against her cheeks and a tear dripping from her chin. She then sniffles a little, shaking her head as she brings her hand to her face, and as she wipes her cheeks she leaves soft grey lines, ash and smoke smearing her pretty tan skin.
Gretchen feels a little ashamed, mostly for having not even noticed Claire was crying because she was too interested in her power, and also because she isn’t sure how to proceed. “You,” she begins, and waits for Claire to turn her attention to her before continuing, “you okay?”
She nods a little to quickly and plasters a fake smile on her face, before settling back and sitting down. Gretchen nods in response, even if she doesn’t believe her, and sits back as well.
“It just sucks,” Claire says simply, and shakes her head before taking a sip of her hot chocolate. “Nothing ever stays, does it?”
Gretchen shrugs. “You do,” she replies simply, and Claire cringes a little. “I just mean…” she stutters, unsure of her next move, “I just mean, for me, you’re always there, you know? And from now on, yeah, I’ll always be here for you, okay?”
Claire’s expression warms and she smiles, this time a real one, and tears start to sparkle in her eyes as she leans over and rests her head on Gretchen’s shoulder, sighing deeply.
She can barely contain the stupid grin that spreads across her face and hopes Claire can’t hear her heart getting ready to beat out of her chest. It feels good, sitting like this, and Gretchen realizes she finally got what she wanted; Claire is hurting, and she’s the one here to pick up the pieces.
Somehow, though, it doesn’t feel as nice as she thought it would. She finds herself wishing instead that Claire’s power would heal up everything about her, not just her skin and bones and teeth but that part of her inside her that’s ripped in two and slowly bleeding out, so that she won’t feel this kind of pain anymore. Thinks one day it might happen, but that then she probably won’t feel anything at all. But that’s not worth worrying about, Gretchen guesses, ‘cause by the time that happens she’ll be long gone anyway. Ashes to ashes, and all that.
But for now they’re here, together, and it’s good. Just two normal girls having hot chocolate and trying to warm themselves by the fire, right?
Her left hand falls from her cup and grazes Claire’s, and her breath catches in her throat as she braces for the moment when Claire pulls her hand away. But she doesn’t move away, just lets their fingers graze until she grasps Gretchen’s hand. She strokes her fingers for a few moments, tickling, and when she finally intertwines her fingers with Gretchen’s, it’s like, boom.