I Need Help

[dis_mount]

I need help with a very serious issue; a friend of mine emailed me a few minutes ago asking for my advice, and I had very little to give her. The letter concerned a friend of hers, someone I've never met but who is in desperate need of help. This is an excerpt from my friend's email:

I have a friend who is not doing well. She's always had some

Comments

[allegraconbrio]

I have been in a not quite the same, but a serious situation with a friend. And sometimes the most difficult and best thing that a friend can do is to insist on taking that friend to a professional. I literally held my friend's hand until he walked into the doctor's consulting room. I was scared enough to lose his friendship in order to make sure he got better help than I could offer.

It wasn't easy, and he isn't a close friend today - but that is okay. I am that person that he will likely always feel awkward around. But he is living, married, has children, and though he never thanked me - I do hear from a mutual friend that he is okay, maybe even happy.

My first thought - advise your friend to talk to her friend honestly - tell her how she is scared for her - and help her to seek help. I made the calls before the talk with my friend, so all I had to do was get my friend's agreement, and he was relieved when I told him that he could go see someone the next day. Part of the not seeking help thing is paralysis. Making plans, calls, seeking options can be so difficult. Having options and help makes it easier.

This may not be much help, but wishing your friend, her friend and you peace and better times. I do hope that your friend's friend gets help and finds her way back.

[dis_mount]

Thank you so much for responding so quickly and with such helpful advice. I've emailed your letter to my friend, and I think it'll help. Your advice is pretty much the same as I've already given her, only better worded; I'm really grateful.

I sincerely appreciate your words of kindness and aid. Thank you so much.

Sorry to drag you into this.

Love,
Dismount

[allegraconbrio]

You didn't drag me into anything, so no worries there. I had another thought when thinking about this, it is important to not be accusatory. I would advise her to concentrate on how her friends' behaviour is worrying her and concerning her. No judgement, just concern - kind of obvious, as your friend is showing a lot of concern by asking for your advice.

*hugs you* I will be thinking of you and your friend and her friend and hoping for the best. Your instincts are right on target, imo.

xoxo