It's been so long since I've been here
It’s been a while since I’ve posted anything in this blog of mine, and I’d love to say it’s because I have nothing to say or because I just can’t think of anything to write. But that’s more or less bullshit - I’m a writer and thus I write every day.
I guess the truth of it is that I’ve been holed up in my little Virginia Beach penalty box licking my wounds for the last several weeks. You see, since I was a little boy the only thing I’ve ever wanted to do was make movies. At that ripe young age that meant being IN movies, but as I grew I realized that what I really wanted to do was write and direct. And so that’s where I’ve been heading for a very long time. So after a few failed attempts I sat down and with two others wrote a relatively simple and marketable horror script. It was the kind of project you could shoot yourself and cast your friends in and it wouldn’t matter.
There we were, moments from starting production on our first day with our confirmed cast. It all felt so tangible. And then my cast bailed on me, two relatively important members of my cast just decided that fulfilling the commitment they’d made to working on the film wasn’t as important to them as they’d initially thought.
What was a freight train of activity barreling forward just ground to a sadly pathetic stop and I was crushed under the weight of it. I’ve commiserated on the subject with a few of you personally, but I felt the best thing to do afterwards was just wait it out.
So I’ve been re-evaluating many of the projects that have been attempted, the ones that are sitting here already scripted and even the half formed ideas. And outside of a potential series of comedic webisodes that we’re considering making, the only one that speaks to me as something I MUST make is Unfinished.
Unfinished is a very personal story that I poured every fiber of my being into writing, and there’s so much of me living and breathing on that page. But I’m still have trepidations over whether or not I’m a good enough director to make it, and the notion of casting actors to fill these roles somewhat frightens me. This is not a film where it doesn’t matter if you can’t act like the horror film was; there is some heavyweight emoting in there.
So I’m still just sitting here, contemplating. And sometimes it seems that’s all I ever do.
Random Thought.
What’s worse: losing someone you thought you couldn’t live without or discovering you’re better off without them?
I guess the truth of it is that I’ve been holed up in my little Virginia Beach penalty box licking my wounds for the last several weeks. You see, since I was a little boy the only thing I’ve ever wanted to do was make movies. At that ripe young age that meant being IN movies, but as I grew I realized that what I really wanted to do was write and direct. And so that’s where I’ve been heading for a very long time. So after a few failed attempts I sat down and with two others wrote a relatively simple and marketable horror script. It was the kind of project you could shoot yourself and cast your friends in and it wouldn’t matter.
There we were, moments from starting production on our first day with our confirmed cast. It all felt so tangible. And then my cast bailed on me, two relatively important members of my cast just decided that fulfilling the commitment they’d made to working on the film wasn’t as important to them as they’d initially thought.
What was a freight train of activity barreling forward just ground to a sadly pathetic stop and I was crushed under the weight of it. I’ve commiserated on the subject with a few of you personally, but I felt the best thing to do afterwards was just wait it out.
So I’ve been re-evaluating many of the projects that have been attempted, the ones that are sitting here already scripted and even the half formed ideas. And outside of a potential series of comedic webisodes that we’re considering making, the only one that speaks to me as something I MUST make is Unfinished.
Unfinished is a very personal story that I poured every fiber of my being into writing, and there’s so much of me living and breathing on that page. But I’m still have trepidations over whether or not I’m a good enough director to make it, and the notion of casting actors to fill these roles somewhat frightens me. This is not a film where it doesn’t matter if you can’t act like the horror film was; there is some heavyweight emoting in there.
So I’m still just sitting here, contemplating. And sometimes it seems that’s all I ever do.
Random Thought.
What’s worse: losing someone you thought you couldn’t live without or discovering you’re better off without them?