We have six days to go people.
everything has been very hectic lately and it seems like everything keeps changing. at least in my life it has.
the new haircut definatly has made me realize a few things. not exactly sure what, but i feel like how i've always imagined myself. tall, thin(ish), very smart(i just got straight A's), and i have a great head of hair that makes me feel older when it's straight and younger when it's curly. i'm a senior. i've been accepted to college. i'm going to graduate. i'm go to europe. i'm turning eighteen. i'm turning EIGHTEEN. i'm turning eighteen. have you ever thought about something and kept repeating it in your head? i'm turning eighteen. sure it's going to come and go and i may not feel much of a difference. at least, not the next morning. and probably not monday when i go to school. maybe not in the next few weeks, or months. but i will feel it. around graduation. around the time we leave for europe. around college. everything keeps moving. and it seems like it's not going to stop...not for a while. time feels like it's running out. now that sounds silly i know because i do have everything ahead of me. but it feels like i also have everything behind me. band, old friends, fights with old friends. old friends i thought that were my friends who aren't really my friends anymore. friends i don't want to keep in touch with when i go to college. i feel out of place a lot of times...i've always felt like i belonged in ryan or zach's grades...never in my own. i have more friends their age groups. laurin and steve and zach are the top 3 on my friends list right now. i lolololove being able to talk about hair and make-up and american eagle and haircuts and SHOES and girly stuff with laurin. if i din't have that i would go crazy...or at least brett would be really really tired of listening to me and holding my purse...
Fun Fact: steve and zach and laurin and i are all around the same shoe size.
i lost my train of thought a while ago and i can't remember whenrei was going. but i'm okay with where i am right now. i'm uneasy about what it going to happen. and that makes me feel like the friendships i used to have aren't worth my time...and not worth fixing. and i feel like a lot of the people that i used to be friends with, i'm not going to be friends with in the future.
but we can't be sure of everything that's going to happen can we? we just have to let it.
Brett and i have been dating for 10 months and a day.