So like...
I don't know if this happens to you, but today I was going through all my folders and deleting shit... and I realized what a fucking idiot I was. LOL.
This always happens a few months after breaking up with someone. I read the conversations, and I'm like, "Ewwwwwww! I thought THAT was cute back then!?!?!" Or the, "I let him get away with speaking to me like that?" Or my favorite, "WHAT THE FUCK WAS I THINKING?!?!"
And I remember thinking at times, "Wow. You hate this sonofabitch, and yet you're still going out with him?" And I remember trying so hard to get the relationship to work... and for what exactly? I have no fucking clue. LOL.
I realized that after dating this new kid (well, it's been a month already, but it's still relatively new.), not to put up with bullshit and staying with someone just because you think that their personality can change. I sometimes think, "Well, he's handsome and extremely smart. Maybe he'll mature someday? Maybe I should stick around and it'll be worthwhile?" Haha, NO.
This is the first guy I don't get into any stupid fights with (or any fights whatsoever) and I'm actually treated nicely. So I decided that if him and I break up, and I date someone new, I'm not going to put up with the same crap that I used to.
I feel bad though, at times. Sometimes I treat this guy kinda mean, and I'm wondering if I'm taking out my anger on my exes on this dude. Like, last week he tried to surprise visit me at my job, and I told him to go away since I didn't want my supervisors to see me with him. I don't even remember thanking him for taking the time to go visit. And the day he left to Chicago, he asked for my address so that he could write letters to me since he wouldn't be able to call or get online, and I didn't want to give it to him because I didn't like the idea of him knowing where I live in case we break up. (I already know he's willing to surprise me at my work. I don't need a surprise visit to my house.) He's always trying to get me to go out, or he asks if he can come visit, even if it's just to see me for a few minutes... and ugh. And he'll call me and we'll talk for hours, sometimes from 7PM to 7AM. It's cute, but I still find it awkward. I guess I don't trust guys when they are nice because usually they always are nice the first month or so. But he hasn't done anything wrong yet, so I guess I'll try to be nicer.
It's ridiculous. I probably would have done anything for my exes to treat me like this guy does, and I tried to be so nice to those dudes, and yet I'm pretty mean to this one. Ironically, I like him. I'm fucked up. XD
This always happens a few months after breaking up with someone. I read the conversations, and I'm like, "Ewwwwwww! I thought THAT was cute back then!?!?!" Or the, "I let him get away with speaking to me like that?" Or my favorite, "WHAT THE FUCK WAS I THINKING?!?!"
And I remember thinking at times, "Wow. You hate this sonofabitch, and yet you're still going out with him?" And I remember trying so hard to get the relationship to work... and for what exactly? I have no fucking clue. LOL.
I realized that after dating this new kid (well, it's been a month already, but it's still relatively new.), not to put up with bullshit and staying with someone just because you think that their personality can change. I sometimes think, "Well, he's handsome and extremely smart. Maybe he'll mature someday? Maybe I should stick around and it'll be worthwhile?" Haha, NO.
This is the first guy I don't get into any stupid fights with (or any fights whatsoever) and I'm actually treated nicely. So I decided that if him and I break up, and I date someone new, I'm not going to put up with the same crap that I used to.
I feel bad though, at times. Sometimes I treat this guy kinda mean, and I'm wondering if I'm taking out my anger on my exes on this dude. Like, last week he tried to surprise visit me at my job, and I told him to go away since I didn't want my supervisors to see me with him. I don't even remember thanking him for taking the time to go visit. And the day he left to Chicago, he asked for my address so that he could write letters to me since he wouldn't be able to call or get online, and I didn't want to give it to him because I didn't like the idea of him knowing where I live in case we break up. (I already know he's willing to surprise me at my work. I don't need a surprise visit to my house.) He's always trying to get me to go out, or he asks if he can come visit, even if it's just to see me for a few minutes... and ugh. And he'll call me and we'll talk for hours, sometimes from 7PM to 7AM. It's cute, but I still find it awkward. I guess I don't trust guys when they are nice because usually they always are nice the first month or so. But he hasn't done anything wrong yet, so I guess I'll try to be nicer.
It's ridiculous. I probably would have done anything for my exes to treat me like this guy does, and I tried to be so nice to those dudes, and yet I'm pretty mean to this one. Ironically, I like him. I'm fucked up. XD