(no subject)
Those of you who have been reading this on-and-off journal for a while may remember this post where I told of the sudden and unexpected loss of our first grandchild at thirty seven weeks gestation.
The good news is that we are joyfully happily nervously awaiting the arrival of grandchild no 2, due in around ten weeks time.
Yes, we should all be happy, and we try daily to achieve this, but past memories rear their heads and intrude into what should be a purely positive experience. It took a long time to really feel an attachment to the baby, and not until after the twenty week scan, which showed a healthy, normal child, could we start to look forwards in a more positive way to her arrival. (Yes, it is a girl) But still, the background worry is there and it shows. We smile a lot and utter cheering and reassuring words to each other, despite the assurances of the specialist, who has most vehemently said that the chances of the last event repeating itself are so minimal that they are off the scale of probability.
E. is more nervous than she lets on. It shows in her concern over things that she was careful about last time, such as what she ate. This time, she is almost over the top in her reluctance to eat anything that might cause harm. We came close to having an argument over it when she visited for lunch the other day and could only bring herself to eat a piece of bread and butter. The soup that I had carefully prepared that very morning was declared unfit for consumption on the grounds that it was "too old". I could only grit my teeth and remember that her level of nervousness must leave ours totally in the dark.
So, please - put your hands together and ask your deity to bless this child - to give her safe passage through birth and beyond, to bless the mother and the father, that they might bring her up in security and happiness. And if you have no deity, just cross your fingers for us all.