Remembered
I’m actually doing really well right now. I’m doing really well. Ironic, isn’t it? The moment I truly decide that I’m not going to deal with this stupid class and the Certificate that is supposed to come with it, I feel better. I know, I KNOW, that I’ll be alright. Suddenly I’m in charge of me again. Suddenly I’m doing something that is for me, for what I want my life to be and what I want to be. I realize that I wasn’t taking that class for me. I was taking that class for my mom and my boyfriend because to them it is proof of me getting something for what I’ve done. They think, and tell me, that is a validation of what I have done. I realize, I don’t feel that way.
So now it doesn’t matter what anyone else thinks. It’s my life and I will live it for me. I am not sorry that I have made this choice. I’m sorry it took me this long to make it. So I will not live for anyone else. I will not be here because I feel I need to be or because I feel I have to be. I will be here and now, live my own life, because I want to be here. Because it’s my choice. It’s like I’ve remembered who I am...
So now it doesn’t matter what anyone else thinks. It’s my life and I will live it for me. I am not sorry that I have made this choice. I’m sorry it took me this long to make it. So I will not live for anyone else. I will not be here because I feel I need to be or because I feel I have to be. I will be here and now, live my own life, because I want to be here. Because it’s my choice. It’s like I’ve remembered who I am...