(no subject)
fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck!!!!!!!
fuck
i made it so much worse.. hearing his voice felt so good.. it was in the back of my mind all day.. it was the only thing that kept me sane all day.. i actualy was happy after he called me bc he said he needed to talk.. why did i do that to myself!? id love to be his friend and all.. but it just hurts so much having him on the other end of the fone n not hearing him say i love you or i miss you or hey hun or anything like that
so i cant sleep... i wish i could.. i have skool in the fucking morning.. so im talkin to crystal.. she asked me to come ova after skool tomarro.. i like going out bc then it helps me take my mind off everything n i cant cry around her n that helps too.. bc i dont wanna cry..today was basically the same as yesterday.. but it was better bc of the above^^ fact that my mind is a bitch n messes with me
omg i just wanna call him back n cry my eyes out n tell him that it hurts so much and i want to be comforted n hugged n kissed n hear i love you and i always will n feel safe n beautiful and happy like he always made me feel.. even tho he enevr believed it.. and im such a fucking loser.. n i wish i didnt feel like that so bad bc then i wouldnt be sitting in front of my computer talking to my dad thro aim begging him to let me stay home tomarro bc i cant sleep ((he said yes)) with my eyes filled with tears like a fucking baby.. i no ppl cry wen they break up.. its just the thought that i know hes not doing it and i am
mike, im sorry if whatev i say bothers or offends u.. but this is a journal n im upset.. so im gunna write it in here ((to everyone)) i dont care who reads this or what they think bc im sad n i have MAJOR pms n im cranky bc ive been up since 7am n i cant sleep n i hate it!! GRRRRRRR
you know what else i hate? my hampster.. ((even tho i love him)), my teddy bear, my tv, my pillows, my shoes, my clothes, my hair, my eyes, my glasses, my bed, my sterio, my cds, my lips, my tears, my nose, my tongue, my hands, my heart, my computer, my cell fone, my purse, my makeup, my underwear, my ears, trucks, the highway, the diner, money ((bc i have like 50 cents)), pictures, my mirror, movies, food, milkshakes, burgers, pasta, livejornal, thinking, my notebook((has half a note to him still in it)), skool, aim, email, streetwise, sunglasses.. blah blah..
fuck
i made it so much worse.. hearing his voice felt so good.. it was in the back of my mind all day.. it was the only thing that kept me sane all day.. i actualy was happy after he called me bc he said he needed to talk.. why did i do that to myself!? id love to be his friend and all.. but it just hurts so much having him on the other end of the fone n not hearing him say i love you or i miss you or hey hun or anything like that
so i cant sleep... i wish i could.. i have skool in the fucking morning.. so im talkin to crystal.. she asked me to come ova after skool tomarro.. i like going out bc then it helps me take my mind off everything n i cant cry around her n that helps too.. bc i dont wanna cry..today was basically the same as yesterday.. but it was better bc of the above^^ fact that my mind is a bitch n messes with me
omg i just wanna call him back n cry my eyes out n tell him that it hurts so much and i want to be comforted n hugged n kissed n hear i love you and i always will n feel safe n beautiful and happy like he always made me feel.. even tho he enevr believed it.. and im such a fucking loser.. n i wish i didnt feel like that so bad bc then i wouldnt be sitting in front of my computer talking to my dad thro aim begging him to let me stay home tomarro bc i cant sleep ((he said yes)) with my eyes filled with tears like a fucking baby.. i no ppl cry wen they break up.. its just the thought that i know hes not doing it and i am
mike, im sorry if whatev i say bothers or offends u.. but this is a journal n im upset.. so im gunna write it in here ((to everyone)) i dont care who reads this or what they think bc im sad n i have MAJOR pms n im cranky bc ive been up since 7am n i cant sleep n i hate it!! GRRRRRRR
you know what else i hate? my hampster.. ((even tho i love him)), my teddy bear, my tv, my pillows, my shoes, my clothes, my hair, my eyes, my glasses, my bed, my sterio, my cds, my lips, my tears, my nose, my tongue, my hands, my heart, my computer, my cell fone, my purse, my makeup, my underwear, my ears, trucks, the highway, the diner, money ((bc i have like 50 cents)), pictures, my mirror, movies, food, milkshakes, burgers, pasta, livejornal, thinking, my notebook((has half a note to him still in it)), skool, aim, email, streetwise, sunglasses.. blah blah..