Our Bittersweet Goodbye
The third part of my Winter holiday what have you post and the first of the fic.
Author: dream-edge
Title: Our Bittersweet Goodbye
Summary: Everything has an ending. Even them.
Rating: K+
Pairings: Dillon/Ziggy, mentioned Dillon.Summer, Ziggy/K
Disclaimer: I do not own the Power Rangers or anything related to the franchise.
Our Bittersweet Goodbye
Everything had its ending. But it wasn't supposed to happen like this.
Dillon watched Ziggy carefully. The young man sat across the table from him, gazing silently out the window. His eyes were dark and distant, and his cheeks were red with winter chill. Steam rose from the cup in his hands, a pair of gloves sitting on the table next to him. The coffeehouse they were in was nearly silent except for the occasional hum of voices and the constant background whisper of Christmas music.
Ziggy hadn't said anything since ordering, preferring to sit quietly and let him stew in his own thoughts. Neither of them wanted to do this; wanted to be here. But they didn't have a choice. They both knew they couldn't keep doing this. Their morals wouldn't let them. "So…" he whispered slowly, unable to bear the silence a moment longer.
Ziggy's eyes flickered towards him, unreadable for once. "So." He echoed, which only made the situation more awkward. Ziggy coughed uncomfortably, sitting up from his slouch. A second later, he seemed to wilt, his shoulder hunching as he, well, huddled was the only word Dillon had for the pose, over his cup. "…How's Summer?" he asked quietly.
"Fine." He replied instantly, then winced. Fine? That was it? Wonderful. "Good." He amended after a moment. "She's good. And K?"
"She's great." Ziggy replied calmly, face still impassive. Dillon nodded like the response didn't make his throat tighten and his heart burn with jealously. He'd lost the right to be jealous a million times over by now; first, when he'd tried to kiss Summer so long ago, second, when he noticed Ziggy's growing attraction to K and only turned his eyes towards Summer even harder, then, the moment inviting Ziggy into his bed had become awkward, but lastly, the minute he'd agreed to this outing, despite knowing the unspoken reason for it.
They fell into another silence, this time more tense than awkward. They both knew what had to happen next. Dillon was sieged by the urge to twist the purpose of this meeting into just an outing between friends. It really shouldn't be that hard; Ziggy couldn't want this any more than he did.
But Ziggy had always been emotionally stronger than he was. Ziggy straightened again and didn't wilt this time. He carefully tugged a necklace out from beneath his shirt. After a second, he pulled it over his head and held it out to Dillon. "This belongs to you." He whispered.
Dillon's breath caught in his throat as he stared at the necklace Ziggy held out to him. The wolf charm spun lazily on its ball-baring chain, catching the light and bouncing it back towards him mockingly. He had given that necklace to Ziggy early on, unsure what he'd meant with the gesture but sure it was the right thing to do. Ziggy had been so very happy with it, always wearing it, sometimes clutching it when he got nervous. Lately though, Dillon had noticed he had taken to wearing it under his shirt, like he didn't want anyone to see it.
He had to take it. This relationship, this… affair- because that was what it was, no matter how dirty the word made it sound- wouldn't end while Ziggy was wearing it. "I gave it to you." He said, gulping. He couldn't bear the thought of Ziggy not wearing it; not when memories of Ziggy lying on his bed adored in nothing but this necklace were still so vividly playing in his head.
"And now I'm giving it back." Ziggy replied. Dillon sighed and took the necklace from the hands he knew so well. Quickly, he wrapped the necklace around his wrist, tucking the charm between the chains. There it would stay; Ziggy was the only lover he had ever wanted to wear it. He didn't think he could handle another wearing it.
A shudder seemed to pass over Ziggy as he watched Dillon secure it. "That's it then." Ziggy whispered, almost to himself, like that mere exchange had cut the last of their ties.
It might as well have, he realized. All physical evidence of their relationship had faded in the past weeks. With this last trinket returned, the only thing left keeping their relationship together was their inability to let each other go. And that had to end now.
Yet despite his thoughts, they lingered in the coffeehouse, their conversation drifting off into meaningless but tense small talk. They couldn't seem to stop talking, both knowing that when they did they would have to leave. And once they left, that had to be the end of this. No more slipping into each other's rooms at night, no more almost romantic outings for lunch, no more conversations that were always layered in double meanings and hidden innuendos. It had to end.
Ziggy's coffee had long gone cold by the time the younger man reluctantly pushed himself to his feet. "I think it's time we left." Ziggy said, his voice oddly blank. Dillon met his gaze and for a second, he slipped and felt himself plead with his eyes -don't go, don't do this, don't end this yet, I can't let you go, choose me- then he stood as well and nodded. Ziggy looked faintly unsettled, like he had read the message in Dillon's eyes, and had to keep telling himself not to give in.
They walked out slowly before standing silently outside the door. Dillon turned to look at Ziggy, unsure what to say. Everything he could think of to say felt a little cruel. Finally, Ziggy turned towards him. His breath billowed out in white clouds between them. Ziggy reached out suddenly, hand curling in his collar and pulling him down.
Ziggy's lips were chilled and dry against his, but still familiar. Dillon responded quickly, wrapping his hands around Ziggy with practiced ease. This was a bad idea. Once they had something, they wanted more. And once they had something, they found it hard to stop. It was why this affair had lasted for so long.
Ziggy drew away slowly. His breath came out shaky, more of a choked sob. His hands shook where they rested on his chest. His eyes were wide and shadowed, none of the strength that had gotten him through this parting left.
The kiss had been bittersweet at best. A goodbye.
Ziggy's hands slipped of his chest and he stepped back, out of the circle of Dillon's arms. "Goodbye Dillon." Ziggy whispered, voice broken and sad. Ziggy turned and walked away, shoulders hunched. Dillon watched him go, squashing the urge to pull him back, to undo today and thus bind them together forever because there was no way they would be able to do this again. But he couldn't do that. Everything had an ending. Even them.
Their morals were too strong to allow them to have an affair while committed to another. It was just a shame they weren't strong enough to choose each other.
Author: dream-edge
Title: Our Bittersweet Goodbye
Summary: Everything has an ending. Even them.
Rating: K+
Pairings: Dillon/Ziggy, mentioned Dillon.Summer, Ziggy/K
Disclaimer: I do not own the Power Rangers or anything related to the franchise.
Our Bittersweet Goodbye
Everything had its ending. But it wasn't supposed to happen like this.
Dillon watched Ziggy carefully. The young man sat across the table from him, gazing silently out the window. His eyes were dark and distant, and his cheeks were red with winter chill. Steam rose from the cup in his hands, a pair of gloves sitting on the table next to him. The coffeehouse they were in was nearly silent except for the occasional hum of voices and the constant background whisper of Christmas music.
Ziggy hadn't said anything since ordering, preferring to sit quietly and let him stew in his own thoughts. Neither of them wanted to do this; wanted to be here. But they didn't have a choice. They both knew they couldn't keep doing this. Their morals wouldn't let them. "So…" he whispered slowly, unable to bear the silence a moment longer.
Ziggy's eyes flickered towards him, unreadable for once. "So." He echoed, which only made the situation more awkward. Ziggy coughed uncomfortably, sitting up from his slouch. A second later, he seemed to wilt, his shoulder hunching as he, well, huddled was the only word Dillon had for the pose, over his cup. "…How's Summer?" he asked quietly.
"Fine." He replied instantly, then winced. Fine? That was it? Wonderful. "Good." He amended after a moment. "She's good. And K?"
"She's great." Ziggy replied calmly, face still impassive. Dillon nodded like the response didn't make his throat tighten and his heart burn with jealously. He'd lost the right to be jealous a million times over by now; first, when he'd tried to kiss Summer so long ago, second, when he noticed Ziggy's growing attraction to K and only turned his eyes towards Summer even harder, then, the moment inviting Ziggy into his bed had become awkward, but lastly, the minute he'd agreed to this outing, despite knowing the unspoken reason for it.
They fell into another silence, this time more tense than awkward. They both knew what had to happen next. Dillon was sieged by the urge to twist the purpose of this meeting into just an outing between friends. It really shouldn't be that hard; Ziggy couldn't want this any more than he did.
But Ziggy had always been emotionally stronger than he was. Ziggy straightened again and didn't wilt this time. He carefully tugged a necklace out from beneath his shirt. After a second, he pulled it over his head and held it out to Dillon. "This belongs to you." He whispered.
Dillon's breath caught in his throat as he stared at the necklace Ziggy held out to him. The wolf charm spun lazily on its ball-baring chain, catching the light and bouncing it back towards him mockingly. He had given that necklace to Ziggy early on, unsure what he'd meant with the gesture but sure it was the right thing to do. Ziggy had been so very happy with it, always wearing it, sometimes clutching it when he got nervous. Lately though, Dillon had noticed he had taken to wearing it under his shirt, like he didn't want anyone to see it.
He had to take it. This relationship, this… affair- because that was what it was, no matter how dirty the word made it sound- wouldn't end while Ziggy was wearing it. "I gave it to you." He said, gulping. He couldn't bear the thought of Ziggy not wearing it; not when memories of Ziggy lying on his bed adored in nothing but this necklace were still so vividly playing in his head.
"And now I'm giving it back." Ziggy replied. Dillon sighed and took the necklace from the hands he knew so well. Quickly, he wrapped the necklace around his wrist, tucking the charm between the chains. There it would stay; Ziggy was the only lover he had ever wanted to wear it. He didn't think he could handle another wearing it.
A shudder seemed to pass over Ziggy as he watched Dillon secure it. "That's it then." Ziggy whispered, almost to himself, like that mere exchange had cut the last of their ties.
It might as well have, he realized. All physical evidence of their relationship had faded in the past weeks. With this last trinket returned, the only thing left keeping their relationship together was their inability to let each other go. And that had to end now.
Yet despite his thoughts, they lingered in the coffeehouse, their conversation drifting off into meaningless but tense small talk. They couldn't seem to stop talking, both knowing that when they did they would have to leave. And once they left, that had to be the end of this. No more slipping into each other's rooms at night, no more almost romantic outings for lunch, no more conversations that were always layered in double meanings and hidden innuendos. It had to end.
Ziggy's coffee had long gone cold by the time the younger man reluctantly pushed himself to his feet. "I think it's time we left." Ziggy said, his voice oddly blank. Dillon met his gaze and for a second, he slipped and felt himself plead with his eyes -don't go, don't do this, don't end this yet, I can't let you go, choose me- then he stood as well and nodded. Ziggy looked faintly unsettled, like he had read the message in Dillon's eyes, and had to keep telling himself not to give in.
They walked out slowly before standing silently outside the door. Dillon turned to look at Ziggy, unsure what to say. Everything he could think of to say felt a little cruel. Finally, Ziggy turned towards him. His breath billowed out in white clouds between them. Ziggy reached out suddenly, hand curling in his collar and pulling him down.
Ziggy's lips were chilled and dry against his, but still familiar. Dillon responded quickly, wrapping his hands around Ziggy with practiced ease. This was a bad idea. Once they had something, they wanted more. And once they had something, they found it hard to stop. It was why this affair had lasted for so long.
Ziggy drew away slowly. His breath came out shaky, more of a choked sob. His hands shook where they rested on his chest. His eyes were wide and shadowed, none of the strength that had gotten him through this parting left.
The kiss had been bittersweet at best. A goodbye.
Ziggy's hands slipped of his chest and he stepped back, out of the circle of Dillon's arms. "Goodbye Dillon." Ziggy whispered, voice broken and sad. Ziggy turned and walked away, shoulders hunched. Dillon watched him go, squashing the urge to pull him back, to undo today and thus bind them together forever because there was no way they would be able to do this again. But he couldn't do that. Everything had an ending. Even them.
Their morals were too strong to allow them to have an affair while committed to another. It was just a shame they weren't strong enough to choose each other.