The Seasons are upon us.
It's Travel Season again...
Today was the first day of Karen's busy season (for her work) where she had to be out of the house so early in the morning that she couldn't take the kids to the sitter's, and home late enough that she couldn't pick them up either.
Although many of her clients are local, and can be reached with a short couple of hours in the car; with corporate enrollment for benefits usually taking place in the last quarter of the year, those clients that are farther away from the St. Louis Principal Financial office will be requiring their annual meetings as well. There will be some times where she will be gone overnight or even for a couple of days to give her 401K retirement and enrollment education meetings.
Although I am very thankful for Karen's job (she is the bread winner of this family), I hate that it takes her away from us (me) at this time of the year. It can be a bit of a strain on my need for routine and conformity (a biproduct of my bipolar and schizoaffective disorder) when I have to change the daily schedule of things. Things as simple as taking the kids to the sitter, or picking them up every day, can seem like major things to me. The extra time to get the kids dressed can feel (to me) like a daunting weight upn my mind.
I've gotten through it for the past two years, but I fear as to how well I will weather it this year with two little ones counting on me.I'll find a way. I have to. And, I'm sure that I can do it (that's what I'll keep telling myself).
Autumn / Fall Season:
As I was driving home from my afternoon appointments with my Therapist and Psych. Dr. I noticed that many of the leaves on the trees are starting to show their gold and red colors amongst the green left over from Summer.
Autumn equinox is only two short days away, and the Fall is always a tough one for me. With the changing of the season, reduction of sunlight, and onset of cooler temperatures; I become more suceptible to onsets of the depressive side of my bipolar disorder.
As a result of this correlation, I have come to dislike the changing of the leaves, and hate the look of the baren/naked trees that come from the change in the trees. It signals death and hibernation (a factor of my bear spirit I suppose) to my mind, and I tend to shut down in many ways along with it. I think that one of the things I loathe most, is the frigid temperatures that the fall season is a predecessor to. The only redemptive quality of that is snow at Christmas time in the winter; but other than that I don't care for snow, and really only want snow at Christmas so that it matches the "story book" atmosphere of the season presented in our media culture.
As far as Autumn, on its own merits, my only two preferred factors of the season are Halloween and Thanksgiving.
I (used to) love Halloween. I love being spooked and feeling spooky with the stories to tell or be told during the month of October. All of the TV specials and kid's cartoons. Dressing up and Trick-or-Treating. I look forward to having fun with Jack, and know that he'll appreciate it even more this year.
I'm hoping that I weather this season at least as well as I did last year, or even better; and now that I am finally coming out of the deep dark funk that has ruled the past 4 to 5 weeks of my life, I'm hoping to get back to a more normal routine and sense of well being.
Today was the first day of Karen's busy season (for her work) where she had to be out of the house so early in the morning that she couldn't take the kids to the sitter's, and home late enough that she couldn't pick them up either.
Although many of her clients are local, and can be reached with a short couple of hours in the car; with corporate enrollment for benefits usually taking place in the last quarter of the year, those clients that are farther away from the St. Louis Principal Financial office will be requiring their annual meetings as well. There will be some times where she will be gone overnight or even for a couple of days to give her 401K retirement and enrollment education meetings.
Although I am very thankful for Karen's job (she is the bread winner of this family), I hate that it takes her away from us (me) at this time of the year. It can be a bit of a strain on my need for routine and conformity (a biproduct of my bipolar and schizoaffective disorder) when I have to change the daily schedule of things. Things as simple as taking the kids to the sitter, or picking them up every day, can seem like major things to me. The extra time to get the kids dressed can feel (to me) like a daunting weight upn my mind.
I've gotten through it for the past two years, but I fear as to how well I will weather it this year with two little ones counting on me.I'll find a way. I have to. And, I'm sure that I can do it (that's what I'll keep telling myself).
Autumn / Fall Season:
As I was driving home from my afternoon appointments with my Therapist and Psych. Dr. I noticed that many of the leaves on the trees are starting to show their gold and red colors amongst the green left over from Summer.
Autumn equinox is only two short days away, and the Fall is always a tough one for me. With the changing of the season, reduction of sunlight, and onset of cooler temperatures; I become more suceptible to onsets of the depressive side of my bipolar disorder.
As a result of this correlation, I have come to dislike the changing of the leaves, and hate the look of the baren/naked trees that come from the change in the trees. It signals death and hibernation (a factor of my bear spirit I suppose) to my mind, and I tend to shut down in many ways along with it. I think that one of the things I loathe most, is the frigid temperatures that the fall season is a predecessor to. The only redemptive quality of that is snow at Christmas time in the winter; but other than that I don't care for snow, and really only want snow at Christmas so that it matches the "story book" atmosphere of the season presented in our media culture.
As far as Autumn, on its own merits, my only two preferred factors of the season are Halloween and Thanksgiving.
I (used to) love Halloween. I love being spooked and feeling spooky with the stories to tell or be told during the month of October. All of the TV specials and kid's cartoons. Dressing up and Trick-or-Treating. I look forward to having fun with Jack, and know that he'll appreciate it even more this year.
I'm hoping that I weather this season at least as well as I did last year, or even better; and now that I am finally coming out of the deep dark funk that has ruled the past 4 to 5 weeks of my life, I'm hoping to get back to a more normal routine and sense of well being.