CH. 3 OF "ONCE IN A LIFETIME"
Here is Chapter Three of what could be my very last story. It is one I started for nienna_weeper's birthday in July and have yet to finish the final chapter.
CHAPTER THREE: UNDERSTANDING THE EDAIN
RATING: R
CHARACTERS: Caranthir, Haleth, Haldan
BETA-READER: dawn_felagund
WARNINGS: Some sex. Not too graphic.
SUMMARY: In this AU story, Haleth and the Haladin do not leave Thargelion. Caranthir has become attracted to Haleth and she to him, but they do not understand each other very well. Caranthir has also formed a relationship with Haleth's orphaned nephew, Haldan.
Caranthir had arranged for one of his bedrooms to be furnished for Haldan-appropriate for a child of his age-complete with small, cozy bed and plenty of toys. The bedding and draperies were brightly-colored reds and blues-and Caranthir had ordered all the wooden furniture to be painted white. He was rather surprised with himself for liking the idea of having a youngster in the house. But he had been alone for too long and the rather quick development of a close relationship with Haldan pleased him.
On a morning almost two weeks after the Orc attacks Caranthir stood in the doorway of Haldan’s room, watching the boy sleep. It had been ten days since Caranthir had rescued Haleth’s people and Haldan had finally begun sleeping through the night. It was now the early morning-the dew was still on the grass-and Caranthir had risen before his usual time in order to look in on the boy.
The Elf had been disappointed at first at the slow recovery that Haldan was making. But as Haleth had explained to him, the Edain healed much more slowly than the Elves. And she pointed out that sometimes their physical fragility caused them to succumb to much less severe injuries than those which could fell Elves. Caranthir watched Haldan with curiosity. So fragile was the little boy that Caranthir feared he would not survive his trauma, especially after speaking with Haleth and being told of the relative easiness of the mortals’ demise.
Haldan had been inactive during the past ten days, sleeping only fitfully at night, and he was listless and tired during the day. Caranthir had tried to talk to him, as had his aunt Haleth, but his response to them was poor at first. He grieved for his father and grandfather in his own way, by holding his feelings inside. He did not act out but remained silent and sullen, not speaking to anyone except in one-word responses to questions.
Caranthir stood and watched Haldan’s chest rise and fall, the boy’s eyelids fluttering slightly from the movement of his eyes beneath them. He was in a state close to waking. The boy looked to be at peace, his brow smooth and his lips full, not drawn into a thin, bitter line as they had recently been.
Caranthir gazed upon Haldan wistfully, his arms folded across his chest, and thought about his feelings for the boy. Haldan had touched him with his child’s show of affection when they had been searching for Mithroch below the cliff. No other child had ever behaved as fondly toward Caranthir before, and Haldan’s actions had softened the Elf’s regard for children. Where once he viewed them as noisy and messy individuals, Caranthir had been shown by Haldan that a child could be a loveable companion.
His thoughts turned to Haldan’s people. The Elf had developed a strong bond with Haldad the chieftain when the Men took care of him after his fall from the cliff. Although the time he had spent with the Edain was brief, he recognized that they possessed many fine qualities. He came to admire and appreciate them for their bravery and strength of purpose, though he disliked their stubbornness.
He entered the room and sat on a chair facing the bed. There he waited until Haldan awoke. During this time he thought of Haleth, the boy’s aunt, who when offered a room in Caranthir’s house, had declined. She said she preferred to stay with the remnants of her people, and that she would be working with them to improve their fighting skills before they made good their plan to resume their journey to Estolad. However, she let Haldan stay in Caranthir’s house, knowing how the boy liked and trusted the Elf.
Haleth impressed Caranthir. He admired her tall, proud bearing, her strength and steadfast nature. The flash of her blue eyes when she was angry intrigued him. And he found himself wondering what she thought of him. Her opinion of him mattered a great deal.
Finally, when Haldan awoke and the boy’s gaze fell upon Caranthir, it held a look of unawareness from the boy’s momentary sense of confusion. Caranthir reached out and took Haldan’s hand in his.
“Welcome, Haldan,” he said.
Haldan stared at him for a few moments until he realized that it was Caranthir who sat beside him and then he spoke.
“Are you my father now?” he asked.
~ ~ ~
A few days later, Caranthir went to see Haleth to speak to her after Haldan had awakened. At that time he had held her hand and beseeched her again not to leave Thargelion. But she had been adamant in her determination to go.
“It was something my father wanted more than anything else,” she said. “To join the rest of the Edain who had gone to Estolad. It was his greatest wish that our people should be reunited, and it was my brother’s also. Now, after their deaths, I feel I must honor their wishes.” She gazed deeply into Caranthir’s eyes when she said this and he noticed how her gaze searched his face. He detected in it many emotions: fear, pain of loss, uncertainty, curiosity, longing, attraction and affection.
“But you are most kind to offer us sanctuary here,” she said. Her voice softened. “I am grateful that you have been so kind to Haldan and me.”
Caranthir clicked his tongue in frustration. “Do you not think of Haldan’s welfare?” he asked. “The boy is still recovering and he feels safe here. He and I have grown quite close. If you take him away now, you will be removing him from yet another adult male that he reveres.”
He stopped when he saw the stricken look in her eyes and he realized the conflict that must be taking place within her. “I am sorry,” he said quickly. “Please forgive me for saying that in such a plain and direct manner. Please come for a walk with me along the riverbank, Haleth. I think that we should discuss our various intended actions and the fresh air will help to clear our thoughts.”
With a nod she agreed, and they went outside. It was autumn and the leaves were falling, intermittent yellow, orange and red things, fluttering down like shreds of paper. They landed upon the grassy path, where the feet of the Elf and mortal trod some of them into the ground, hastening their demise.
“I wish you would reconsider remaining here,” Caranthir was saying.
“You do not understand us,” said Haleth. “Our intent is to reach Estolad before another winter passes. We have delayed too long in past years. If we had gone with Bëor’s people in the first place perhaps my father’s and my brother’s deaths could have been prevented.”
“No one can predict the future accurately, Haleth. But I offer you sanctuary here on my lands where you will be safe,” said Caranthir. “And you will have a home.”
Haleth shook her head, adamant in her determination. “It is very kind of you to make this offer to us,” she said, “but we will be going.”
Caranthir stopped walking and took her by the arm to halt her progress. He turned her to face him and regarded her closely. Before him stood a tall, fair-haired woman of stubborn posture. Her features were strong-sharp, ice-blue eyes, high flushed cheekbones looking as if they had been rubbed raw-and a strong jaw. Her mouth was large, her even teeth white and gleaming. He liked her strong face. And her attitude excited him.
“I can offer you more than a home,” he said.
“What are you offering, Caranthir?” she asked. He thought she looked suddenly startled and uncertain. Her gaze, usually direct and unwavering, dropped from his. Her stance, which had been rigid and poised, her weight planted firmly on her two feet, shifted to one side as she took a step backwards.
“I care very much for Haldan,” he said. “Your nephew has become like a son to me and his condition is still fragile. I do not think he should leave to undertake such a long journey. I also don’t think he would want to go because I believe he has grown to love me.”
“Is that why you want me to stay here? Because of your closeness to my nephew?” she asked. Her eyes flashed. She looked affronted, as if he had offended her.
“Not only for that reason,” he said. His voice was soft and soothing. He stepped forward, narrowing the distance between them. “I would like us to get to know each other better too.”
Haleth’s eyes grew wide until he could see the whites all around her irises. “I may not want what you want,” she said. Her words were bold but her voice faltered.
“Haleth,” he said, and took her hands in his. “I confess I would like you to stay because I feel an attraction to you. I have known it since that first time I saw you when you came into my tent. There was a look in your eyes and a strength in your bearing that intrigued me. Do you deny that you feel an attraction to me?” he asked, squeezing her hands. “I have seen the way you look at me. I heard how you described me to your friend when you had seen me naked in your father’s tent.”
Haleth blushed and tried to pull away, but Caranthir held her hands clasped to his chest. He was much taller than her, although she was a tall woman. He bent his head and kissed her cheek, and let his lips linger against her skin.
She gasped and struggled to free herself. “You are very bold to speak of that!” Haleth cried. “How could you hear us?”
“It would seem that Elvish hearing is much more acute than that of Men. But is it not true?” Caranthir asked her. “Are you not attracted to me?” He was determined to get the correct response from her.
Haleth sighed and relinquished the struggle against him. “Any woman would be attracted to you,” she said. “You are beautiful, brave and kind.”
“Then if you admit you feel that you are attracted to me, stay here with me,” he said. “If we grow to like each other better-and I am sure that we shall-then we can marry and be proper parents to Haldan.”
“But we cannot marry,” she said. She sounded shocked. She tried to pull her hands away again but he held them tight.
“Why can we not?” asked Caranthir, his voice becoming soothing, seductive.
“Because you are an Elf,” she said. “And I am mortal. We do not belong together.”
“The differences between our races are of no consequence. What is important are the similarities,” he said, and moved to kiss her.
She bent her head back to avoid his lips. She tried her best to avoid smiling at his effrontery. “Do I need to explain the complications of such a union to you?” she asked. “The most important of which is that you shall outlive me.”
“That is not necessarily true,” he said. “We live in a time of war and many battles. I could be slain at any time, just like a mortal. There are more similarities between our races than there are differences, in my view.”
“Oh, do not say that, Caranthir.” She was moved by his words. He had broken through her steadfast wall of emotionless calm. “ I have seen too much death. To witness yours would finish me. I would rather die first.” She would have continued but she was silenced by his kiss. He let her hands fall free so that he could cup the back of her head and pull her face to his. He pressed his lips to her mouth, enveloping it in a deep, lingering kiss. With his other hand held firmly around her waist, he pulled her body tightly against his. He pressed upon her a series of kisses that lasted for many minutes. Caranthir eventually broke their embrace, realizing that Haleth had not made a move to disentangle herself. On the contrary, she had leaned in to accept his kisses with enthusiasm. Caranthir smiled, greatly pleased. He looked down at Haleth, brushing stray bits of hair from her face, and saw that she was panting. He had felt her body moving against his during their kisses and he had become aroused. He wondered if she had noticed.
“I need to go and tend to something,” she murmured, but made no motion to leave.
“Must you?” he asked, gazing at her with a piteous look on his face, as if he would be bereft by her absence.
“Ummm…I cannot now remember what it was,” she said with a shrug and a small smile.
“Then it could not have been important,” he said. He took her arm and his eyes sparkled. “Haleth, would you accompany me back to my house? I want you to see Haldan today. He is doing better.” Secretly, he did not want her to be apart from him any more, for any reason.
A blush infused Haleth’s cheeks with a high color. One hand flew to her head and she nervously tucked a stray strand of hair behind her ear. She looked down at her makeshift armor that covered the ragged clothing that she wore. “I have nothing to wear to visit your fine home. I was going to oversee the sword-practice today.”
“Someone else can do that, surely,” said Caranthir. “In my house it does not matter what you wear,” he assured her. “Wear what you are wearing. It will be fine. There is no one there to see you except me. And to me you look lovely no matter what raiment covers you.” He bent to take her hand and he raised it to his lips. “Please say that you will accompany me. I wish for you to see Haldan’s progress. Then I would like the three of us to spend the rest of the day together. Would you like that also?”
Haleth nodded. She smiled up at him. “Yes, I would,” she said.
~ ~ ~
“Tell me again about the Balrog,” said Haldan, staring at Caranthir with eyes wide, stuffing his mouth full of lamb stew sopped up with great hunks of fresh-baked bread, all washed down with a mild wine.
“You should eat more slowly, young man,” Caranthir admonished from the other side of the table. “Otherwise you shall have a stomach-ache tonight and your Aunt Haleth will have to clean up your mess when you throw up all your food on your floor.”
“And Aunt Haleth is determined to do no such thing!” Haleth retorted. She sat beside Haldan while Caranthir was seated opposite the two Edain, instead of at his customary place at the head of the table. Haleth pushed Haldan’s plate away so that he could not reach it. “Finish what you have in your mouth first before you take another bite,” she warned him.
She looked around the spacious dining room, outfitted in mahogany furniture and gold and silver dishware and ornaments, its table linens of the finest quality and glassware of exquisite crystal. “You do not keep a lot of servants,” she said, “for so grand a house.”
“No, I have just a few,” he said. “Only what is necessary for the upkeep of such a large dwelling. From time to time I will entertain my brothers and cousins, and some of the lords of the nearby estates and their families, but that does not happen as often now in time of war, as it used to. When I have a large gathering I will ask some of the people from one of the nearby towns to come in and assist me, and I pay them well for their help.”
“You are generous and warm-hearted,” said Haleth. They smiled at each other, polite courtesies that hid the torrents of emotion within them. Caranthir ached to hold Haleth in his arms again, and hoped that she felt the same about him.
“Papa Caranthir!” Haldan cried between mouthfuls. “Have you forgotten the Balrog?”
Caranthir looked at him with one eyebrow raised. “How much have I told you so far?” he asked.
“Only that your Papa was killed by one just as mine was killed by Orcs. And you told me what the Balrog looked like-tell me again-it was most exciting!” cried Haldan.
Caranthir sighed and rolled his eyes toward Haleth.
“Papa Caranthir?” she asked, looking at Haldan with one side of her lips upturned in a half-smile.
Caranthir grinned at her before he continued his story. “Well, my father had been very foolish to rush ahead as he did-alone-to fight such a terrible beast,” Caranthir said.
“So was mine foolish to run at the Orcs!” Haldan interjected.
“Hush! Let Caranthir speak!” Haleth cried, putting her hand over Haldan’s mouth to silence him.
“The creature was fearsome-it was fifteen feet tall, with breath of fire and body of shadow,” Caranthir continued. “It wielded a huge sword made of black iron and from which sprang flames. It was like nothing my brothers and I had ever before seen.”
“You do not seem very upset to speak to us of your father’s terrible death,” said Haleth.
“That is true for several reasons,” said Caranthir. “For one, it happened hundreds of years ago. This points out an interesting difference between Elves and mortals, Haleth. The great passages of time that we must endure serve to alleviate the pain of a loved one’s death, and Elves know this. There is another factor concerning the death of Elves to consider as well. That is the possibility of resurrection. It is possible that my father could be restored some day and return to us. Third, I am trying to help Haldan feel better about what has happened to his own father and grandfather, even though I speak of their deaths quite soon after their occurrences. But I realized that you and Haldan are in my home now, in the present with me, and I must enjoy my time with you.” He refrained from reminding her how short that time would seem to him.
“I like to think about my Papa and Grandpa,” said Haldan. “Even though it still makes me sad to think about their deaths. I miss them a lot. But I love hearing the story about your father and the Balrog.” Haldan rose in haste from the table and dashed around its length in order to throw himself at Caranthir and hug him.
Caranthir returned the gesture with much enthusiasm. His gaze met Haleth’s across the table as he kissed the top of Haldan’s head. He was pleased to see a look of genuine affection in her blue eyes as she gazed back at him.
The three talked long into the evening, telling stories about each other and their people. Caranthir ended Haldan’s evening by telling him that they would go riding the next day-and that Caranthir would find the boy a pony his own size and teach him how to ride properly. Haldan went to bed happier than he had been since his father and grandfather had taken him hunting. That had been less than a year ago although it seemed a very long time to the boy.
Haleth and Caranthir retired to a parlor after they had put Haldan to bed. The Elf sat beside the mortal woman on a sofa and played with her hair, gently pulling one of her curls into a straight strand between his fingers and then letting it snap back to its ringlet shape. His eyes were bright with desire, his chest pressed boldly against her arm so she could be sure to feel its rapid rising and falling and know of his need.
She was not uncomfortable and leaned into him. “You spoke to me of marriage, Caranthir,” she said. “But there was no mention of love. Do you want this marriage out of a sense of duty to Haldan, to provide him with a convenient set of parents, without feelings of love for me?”
“There are many marriages that have been created out of love between Elves,” said Caranthir. “Only to have foundered upon change. I see nothing wrong in making a marriage out of a sense of duty. It is doing the sensible thing.”
An angry look flashed in Haleth’s eyes and she started to rise.
“No, please hear me out,” said Caranthir, and pushed her back down.
“First, Elven marriages are formed out of love, but love sometimes takes a long time to blossom. We Elves have time to let it grow and bloom. It starts with an initial attraction, and you know that you and I have that attraction between us. Second, we have not the time that two Elves have at their leisure. Third,” he started to say but he was cut off by Haleth’s fingers suddenly pressing against his lips.
“Do you always place everything within the confines of lists?” she asked him.
“I am an organized person,” he said. “And very orderly in the way I do things. Do you think you could live with someone like me?”
“I am the opposite,” she said. “It is more the question of whether you could live with me. I do feel an attraction to you, though, in answer to your previous question.”
“And I do believe that I am falling in love with you, Haleth. Should we not kiss?” He had removed his tunic while she was speaking and sat before her with his chest bare. He began to search with his fingers for the fastenings of her outer garment.
“Stop,” she said, her fingers flying to pry his from her clothing.
“It is time we discovered each other in the carnal sense,” he said. “Only then will we understand the true depths of our feelings for each other.”
“But I feel shy about you seeing me naked,” she said, pulling his hands away. She was staring at his chest. Her lips parted and he could see her tongue against her lower lip.
“Haleth, you have already seen me naked,” he said. “It is only fair that I should also see you-“
She placed her hands against his chest. “But you are beautiful,” she said, “and I am ugly. Your body is not hairy like mine.”
Caranthir laughed softly and pulled her to him in a close embrace. “I do not believe that you are hairy, Haleth! Or ugly! Why do you resist me when you have admitted to loving me?”
“No. I have hair in places where you do not,” she said. “After seeing you, I feel as if I am ugly-more like a beast than a human.”
He pulled away from her and stood. He removed his pants and the remainder of his clothing and posed before her naked.
“You see I am not entirely hairless,” he said.
She stared at his splendid form in awe. “Are all Elves as wicked as you are? She asked him. “Did you know that once I saw you I would not be able to resist you?” She placed a hand firmly on his abdomen and felt the hard ripples of its muscle.
He sat down again and gathered her in his arms for a long, lingering kiss. He began anew to fumble with the clasps of her clothing. Over the next hour or so Caranthir made love to Haleth with both tenderness and passion. Since his innate lust had been pent-up for many years and its release was exquisite, it was more enjoyable because he spent it upon someone that excited him, and whom he admired. He found the mortal woman’s form lovely and endearing. Its warmth was palpable and enveloped him in its soft femininity. He pressed his face into the top of her shoulder and delighted in the smooth, yielding feel of its flesh.
Her body, her limbs covered in soft, downy hair, felt warm and inviting against the smoothness of his. Her vitality excited him. When they connected and he entered her, he delighted in how well they fit together. They shared a satisfying syncopation with their rhythms combining into one entity, both of them driving toward shared satisfaction.
His release pounded in his ears. It seemed a palpable thing, a freed beast, now tamed and anxious to leave his body. He climaxed with a great, shuddering cry, apologizing to Haleth later for its intensity lest it had frightened her.
Afterwards, she laughed, holding his head between her hands and kissing his forehead. “I was foolish to feel so afraid of making love to you,” she said, gazing upon him, her eyes full of happy tears. “It was beautiful, Caranthir.”
“Do you think you would like to stay with me now?” Caranthir asked her, while holding her tightly in his arms.
CHAPTER THREE: UNDERSTANDING THE EDAIN
RATING: R
CHARACTERS: Caranthir, Haleth, Haldan
BETA-READER: dawn_felagund
WARNINGS: Some sex. Not too graphic.
SUMMARY: In this AU story, Haleth and the Haladin do not leave Thargelion. Caranthir has become attracted to Haleth and she to him, but they do not understand each other very well. Caranthir has also formed a relationship with Haleth's orphaned nephew, Haldan.
Caranthir had arranged for one of his bedrooms to be furnished for Haldan-appropriate for a child of his age-complete with small, cozy bed and plenty of toys. The bedding and draperies were brightly-colored reds and blues-and Caranthir had ordered all the wooden furniture to be painted white. He was rather surprised with himself for liking the idea of having a youngster in the house. But he had been alone for too long and the rather quick development of a close relationship with Haldan pleased him.
On a morning almost two weeks after the Orc attacks Caranthir stood in the doorway of Haldan’s room, watching the boy sleep. It had been ten days since Caranthir had rescued Haleth’s people and Haldan had finally begun sleeping through the night. It was now the early morning-the dew was still on the grass-and Caranthir had risen before his usual time in order to look in on the boy.
The Elf had been disappointed at first at the slow recovery that Haldan was making. But as Haleth had explained to him, the Edain healed much more slowly than the Elves. And she pointed out that sometimes their physical fragility caused them to succumb to much less severe injuries than those which could fell Elves. Caranthir watched Haldan with curiosity. So fragile was the little boy that Caranthir feared he would not survive his trauma, especially after speaking with Haleth and being told of the relative easiness of the mortals’ demise.
Haldan had been inactive during the past ten days, sleeping only fitfully at night, and he was listless and tired during the day. Caranthir had tried to talk to him, as had his aunt Haleth, but his response to them was poor at first. He grieved for his father and grandfather in his own way, by holding his feelings inside. He did not act out but remained silent and sullen, not speaking to anyone except in one-word responses to questions.
Caranthir stood and watched Haldan’s chest rise and fall, the boy’s eyelids fluttering slightly from the movement of his eyes beneath them. He was in a state close to waking. The boy looked to be at peace, his brow smooth and his lips full, not drawn into a thin, bitter line as they had recently been.
Caranthir gazed upon Haldan wistfully, his arms folded across his chest, and thought about his feelings for the boy. Haldan had touched him with his child’s show of affection when they had been searching for Mithroch below the cliff. No other child had ever behaved as fondly toward Caranthir before, and Haldan’s actions had softened the Elf’s regard for children. Where once he viewed them as noisy and messy individuals, Caranthir had been shown by Haldan that a child could be a loveable companion.
His thoughts turned to Haldan’s people. The Elf had developed a strong bond with Haldad the chieftain when the Men took care of him after his fall from the cliff. Although the time he had spent with the Edain was brief, he recognized that they possessed many fine qualities. He came to admire and appreciate them for their bravery and strength of purpose, though he disliked their stubbornness.
He entered the room and sat on a chair facing the bed. There he waited until Haldan awoke. During this time he thought of Haleth, the boy’s aunt, who when offered a room in Caranthir’s house, had declined. She said she preferred to stay with the remnants of her people, and that she would be working with them to improve their fighting skills before they made good their plan to resume their journey to Estolad. However, she let Haldan stay in Caranthir’s house, knowing how the boy liked and trusted the Elf.
Haleth impressed Caranthir. He admired her tall, proud bearing, her strength and steadfast nature. The flash of her blue eyes when she was angry intrigued him. And he found himself wondering what she thought of him. Her opinion of him mattered a great deal.
Finally, when Haldan awoke and the boy’s gaze fell upon Caranthir, it held a look of unawareness from the boy’s momentary sense of confusion. Caranthir reached out and took Haldan’s hand in his.
“Welcome, Haldan,” he said.
Haldan stared at him for a few moments until he realized that it was Caranthir who sat beside him and then he spoke.
“Are you my father now?” he asked.
~ ~ ~
A few days later, Caranthir went to see Haleth to speak to her after Haldan had awakened. At that time he had held her hand and beseeched her again not to leave Thargelion. But she had been adamant in her determination to go.
“It was something my father wanted more than anything else,” she said. “To join the rest of the Edain who had gone to Estolad. It was his greatest wish that our people should be reunited, and it was my brother’s also. Now, after their deaths, I feel I must honor their wishes.” She gazed deeply into Caranthir’s eyes when she said this and he noticed how her gaze searched his face. He detected in it many emotions: fear, pain of loss, uncertainty, curiosity, longing, attraction and affection.
“But you are most kind to offer us sanctuary here,” she said. Her voice softened. “I am grateful that you have been so kind to Haldan and me.”
Caranthir clicked his tongue in frustration. “Do you not think of Haldan’s welfare?” he asked. “The boy is still recovering and he feels safe here. He and I have grown quite close. If you take him away now, you will be removing him from yet another adult male that he reveres.”
He stopped when he saw the stricken look in her eyes and he realized the conflict that must be taking place within her. “I am sorry,” he said quickly. “Please forgive me for saying that in such a plain and direct manner. Please come for a walk with me along the riverbank, Haleth. I think that we should discuss our various intended actions and the fresh air will help to clear our thoughts.”
With a nod she agreed, and they went outside. It was autumn and the leaves were falling, intermittent yellow, orange and red things, fluttering down like shreds of paper. They landed upon the grassy path, where the feet of the Elf and mortal trod some of them into the ground, hastening their demise.
“I wish you would reconsider remaining here,” Caranthir was saying.
“You do not understand us,” said Haleth. “Our intent is to reach Estolad before another winter passes. We have delayed too long in past years. If we had gone with Bëor’s people in the first place perhaps my father’s and my brother’s deaths could have been prevented.”
“No one can predict the future accurately, Haleth. But I offer you sanctuary here on my lands where you will be safe,” said Caranthir. “And you will have a home.”
Haleth shook her head, adamant in her determination. “It is very kind of you to make this offer to us,” she said, “but we will be going.”
Caranthir stopped walking and took her by the arm to halt her progress. He turned her to face him and regarded her closely. Before him stood a tall, fair-haired woman of stubborn posture. Her features were strong-sharp, ice-blue eyes, high flushed cheekbones looking as if they had been rubbed raw-and a strong jaw. Her mouth was large, her even teeth white and gleaming. He liked her strong face. And her attitude excited him.
“I can offer you more than a home,” he said.
“What are you offering, Caranthir?” she asked. He thought she looked suddenly startled and uncertain. Her gaze, usually direct and unwavering, dropped from his. Her stance, which had been rigid and poised, her weight planted firmly on her two feet, shifted to one side as she took a step backwards.
“I care very much for Haldan,” he said. “Your nephew has become like a son to me and his condition is still fragile. I do not think he should leave to undertake such a long journey. I also don’t think he would want to go because I believe he has grown to love me.”
“Is that why you want me to stay here? Because of your closeness to my nephew?” she asked. Her eyes flashed. She looked affronted, as if he had offended her.
“Not only for that reason,” he said. His voice was soft and soothing. He stepped forward, narrowing the distance between them. “I would like us to get to know each other better too.”
Haleth’s eyes grew wide until he could see the whites all around her irises. “I may not want what you want,” she said. Her words were bold but her voice faltered.
“Haleth,” he said, and took her hands in his. “I confess I would like you to stay because I feel an attraction to you. I have known it since that first time I saw you when you came into my tent. There was a look in your eyes and a strength in your bearing that intrigued me. Do you deny that you feel an attraction to me?” he asked, squeezing her hands. “I have seen the way you look at me. I heard how you described me to your friend when you had seen me naked in your father’s tent.”
Haleth blushed and tried to pull away, but Caranthir held her hands clasped to his chest. He was much taller than her, although she was a tall woman. He bent his head and kissed her cheek, and let his lips linger against her skin.
She gasped and struggled to free herself. “You are very bold to speak of that!” Haleth cried. “How could you hear us?”
“It would seem that Elvish hearing is much more acute than that of Men. But is it not true?” Caranthir asked her. “Are you not attracted to me?” He was determined to get the correct response from her.
Haleth sighed and relinquished the struggle against him. “Any woman would be attracted to you,” she said. “You are beautiful, brave and kind.”
“Then if you admit you feel that you are attracted to me, stay here with me,” he said. “If we grow to like each other better-and I am sure that we shall-then we can marry and be proper parents to Haldan.”
“But we cannot marry,” she said. She sounded shocked. She tried to pull her hands away again but he held them tight.
“Why can we not?” asked Caranthir, his voice becoming soothing, seductive.
“Because you are an Elf,” she said. “And I am mortal. We do not belong together.”
“The differences between our races are of no consequence. What is important are the similarities,” he said, and moved to kiss her.
She bent her head back to avoid his lips. She tried her best to avoid smiling at his effrontery. “Do I need to explain the complications of such a union to you?” she asked. “The most important of which is that you shall outlive me.”
“That is not necessarily true,” he said. “We live in a time of war and many battles. I could be slain at any time, just like a mortal. There are more similarities between our races than there are differences, in my view.”
“Oh, do not say that, Caranthir.” She was moved by his words. He had broken through her steadfast wall of emotionless calm. “ I have seen too much death. To witness yours would finish me. I would rather die first.” She would have continued but she was silenced by his kiss. He let her hands fall free so that he could cup the back of her head and pull her face to his. He pressed his lips to her mouth, enveloping it in a deep, lingering kiss. With his other hand held firmly around her waist, he pulled her body tightly against his. He pressed upon her a series of kisses that lasted for many minutes. Caranthir eventually broke their embrace, realizing that Haleth had not made a move to disentangle herself. On the contrary, she had leaned in to accept his kisses with enthusiasm. Caranthir smiled, greatly pleased. He looked down at Haleth, brushing stray bits of hair from her face, and saw that she was panting. He had felt her body moving against his during their kisses and he had become aroused. He wondered if she had noticed.
“I need to go and tend to something,” she murmured, but made no motion to leave.
“Must you?” he asked, gazing at her with a piteous look on his face, as if he would be bereft by her absence.
“Ummm…I cannot now remember what it was,” she said with a shrug and a small smile.
“Then it could not have been important,” he said. He took her arm and his eyes sparkled. “Haleth, would you accompany me back to my house? I want you to see Haldan today. He is doing better.” Secretly, he did not want her to be apart from him any more, for any reason.
A blush infused Haleth’s cheeks with a high color. One hand flew to her head and she nervously tucked a stray strand of hair behind her ear. She looked down at her makeshift armor that covered the ragged clothing that she wore. “I have nothing to wear to visit your fine home. I was going to oversee the sword-practice today.”
“Someone else can do that, surely,” said Caranthir. “In my house it does not matter what you wear,” he assured her. “Wear what you are wearing. It will be fine. There is no one there to see you except me. And to me you look lovely no matter what raiment covers you.” He bent to take her hand and he raised it to his lips. “Please say that you will accompany me. I wish for you to see Haldan’s progress. Then I would like the three of us to spend the rest of the day together. Would you like that also?”
Haleth nodded. She smiled up at him. “Yes, I would,” she said.
~ ~ ~
“Tell me again about the Balrog,” said Haldan, staring at Caranthir with eyes wide, stuffing his mouth full of lamb stew sopped up with great hunks of fresh-baked bread, all washed down with a mild wine.
“You should eat more slowly, young man,” Caranthir admonished from the other side of the table. “Otherwise you shall have a stomach-ache tonight and your Aunt Haleth will have to clean up your mess when you throw up all your food on your floor.”
“And Aunt Haleth is determined to do no such thing!” Haleth retorted. She sat beside Haldan while Caranthir was seated opposite the two Edain, instead of at his customary place at the head of the table. Haleth pushed Haldan’s plate away so that he could not reach it. “Finish what you have in your mouth first before you take another bite,” she warned him.
She looked around the spacious dining room, outfitted in mahogany furniture and gold and silver dishware and ornaments, its table linens of the finest quality and glassware of exquisite crystal. “You do not keep a lot of servants,” she said, “for so grand a house.”
“No, I have just a few,” he said. “Only what is necessary for the upkeep of such a large dwelling. From time to time I will entertain my brothers and cousins, and some of the lords of the nearby estates and their families, but that does not happen as often now in time of war, as it used to. When I have a large gathering I will ask some of the people from one of the nearby towns to come in and assist me, and I pay them well for their help.”
“You are generous and warm-hearted,” said Haleth. They smiled at each other, polite courtesies that hid the torrents of emotion within them. Caranthir ached to hold Haleth in his arms again, and hoped that she felt the same about him.
“Papa Caranthir!” Haldan cried between mouthfuls. “Have you forgotten the Balrog?”
Caranthir looked at him with one eyebrow raised. “How much have I told you so far?” he asked.
“Only that your Papa was killed by one just as mine was killed by Orcs. And you told me what the Balrog looked like-tell me again-it was most exciting!” cried Haldan.
Caranthir sighed and rolled his eyes toward Haleth.
“Papa Caranthir?” she asked, looking at Haldan with one side of her lips upturned in a half-smile.
Caranthir grinned at her before he continued his story. “Well, my father had been very foolish to rush ahead as he did-alone-to fight such a terrible beast,” Caranthir said.
“So was mine foolish to run at the Orcs!” Haldan interjected.
“Hush! Let Caranthir speak!” Haleth cried, putting her hand over Haldan’s mouth to silence him.
“The creature was fearsome-it was fifteen feet tall, with breath of fire and body of shadow,” Caranthir continued. “It wielded a huge sword made of black iron and from which sprang flames. It was like nothing my brothers and I had ever before seen.”
“You do not seem very upset to speak to us of your father’s terrible death,” said Haleth.
“That is true for several reasons,” said Caranthir. “For one, it happened hundreds of years ago. This points out an interesting difference between Elves and mortals, Haleth. The great passages of time that we must endure serve to alleviate the pain of a loved one’s death, and Elves know this. There is another factor concerning the death of Elves to consider as well. That is the possibility of resurrection. It is possible that my father could be restored some day and return to us. Third, I am trying to help Haldan feel better about what has happened to his own father and grandfather, even though I speak of their deaths quite soon after their occurrences. But I realized that you and Haldan are in my home now, in the present with me, and I must enjoy my time with you.” He refrained from reminding her how short that time would seem to him.
“I like to think about my Papa and Grandpa,” said Haldan. “Even though it still makes me sad to think about their deaths. I miss them a lot. But I love hearing the story about your father and the Balrog.” Haldan rose in haste from the table and dashed around its length in order to throw himself at Caranthir and hug him.
Caranthir returned the gesture with much enthusiasm. His gaze met Haleth’s across the table as he kissed the top of Haldan’s head. He was pleased to see a look of genuine affection in her blue eyes as she gazed back at him.
The three talked long into the evening, telling stories about each other and their people. Caranthir ended Haldan’s evening by telling him that they would go riding the next day-and that Caranthir would find the boy a pony his own size and teach him how to ride properly. Haldan went to bed happier than he had been since his father and grandfather had taken him hunting. That had been less than a year ago although it seemed a very long time to the boy.
Haleth and Caranthir retired to a parlor after they had put Haldan to bed. The Elf sat beside the mortal woman on a sofa and played with her hair, gently pulling one of her curls into a straight strand between his fingers and then letting it snap back to its ringlet shape. His eyes were bright with desire, his chest pressed boldly against her arm so she could be sure to feel its rapid rising and falling and know of his need.
She was not uncomfortable and leaned into him. “You spoke to me of marriage, Caranthir,” she said. “But there was no mention of love. Do you want this marriage out of a sense of duty to Haldan, to provide him with a convenient set of parents, without feelings of love for me?”
“There are many marriages that have been created out of love between Elves,” said Caranthir. “Only to have foundered upon change. I see nothing wrong in making a marriage out of a sense of duty. It is doing the sensible thing.”
An angry look flashed in Haleth’s eyes and she started to rise.
“No, please hear me out,” said Caranthir, and pushed her back down.
“First, Elven marriages are formed out of love, but love sometimes takes a long time to blossom. We Elves have time to let it grow and bloom. It starts with an initial attraction, and you know that you and I have that attraction between us. Second, we have not the time that two Elves have at their leisure. Third,” he started to say but he was cut off by Haleth’s fingers suddenly pressing against his lips.
“Do you always place everything within the confines of lists?” she asked him.
“I am an organized person,” he said. “And very orderly in the way I do things. Do you think you could live with someone like me?”
“I am the opposite,” she said. “It is more the question of whether you could live with me. I do feel an attraction to you, though, in answer to your previous question.”
“And I do believe that I am falling in love with you, Haleth. Should we not kiss?” He had removed his tunic while she was speaking and sat before her with his chest bare. He began to search with his fingers for the fastenings of her outer garment.
“Stop,” she said, her fingers flying to pry his from her clothing.
“It is time we discovered each other in the carnal sense,” he said. “Only then will we understand the true depths of our feelings for each other.”
“But I feel shy about you seeing me naked,” she said, pulling his hands away. She was staring at his chest. Her lips parted and he could see her tongue against her lower lip.
“Haleth, you have already seen me naked,” he said. “It is only fair that I should also see you-“
She placed her hands against his chest. “But you are beautiful,” she said, “and I am ugly. Your body is not hairy like mine.”
Caranthir laughed softly and pulled her to him in a close embrace. “I do not believe that you are hairy, Haleth! Or ugly! Why do you resist me when you have admitted to loving me?”
“No. I have hair in places where you do not,” she said. “After seeing you, I feel as if I am ugly-more like a beast than a human.”
He pulled away from her and stood. He removed his pants and the remainder of his clothing and posed before her naked.
“You see I am not entirely hairless,” he said.
She stared at his splendid form in awe. “Are all Elves as wicked as you are? She asked him. “Did you know that once I saw you I would not be able to resist you?” She placed a hand firmly on his abdomen and felt the hard ripples of its muscle.
He sat down again and gathered her in his arms for a long, lingering kiss. He began anew to fumble with the clasps of her clothing. Over the next hour or so Caranthir made love to Haleth with both tenderness and passion. Since his innate lust had been pent-up for many years and its release was exquisite, it was more enjoyable because he spent it upon someone that excited him, and whom he admired. He found the mortal woman’s form lovely and endearing. Its warmth was palpable and enveloped him in its soft femininity. He pressed his face into the top of her shoulder and delighted in the smooth, yielding feel of its flesh.
Her body, her limbs covered in soft, downy hair, felt warm and inviting against the smoothness of his. Her vitality excited him. When they connected and he entered her, he delighted in how well they fit together. They shared a satisfying syncopation with their rhythms combining into one entity, both of them driving toward shared satisfaction.
His release pounded in his ears. It seemed a palpable thing, a freed beast, now tamed and anxious to leave his body. He climaxed with a great, shuddering cry, apologizing to Haleth later for its intensity lest it had frightened her.
Afterwards, she laughed, holding his head between her hands and kissing his forehead. “I was foolish to feel so afraid of making love to you,” she said, gazing upon him, her eyes full of happy tears. “It was beautiful, Caranthir.”
“Do you think you would like to stay with me now?” Caranthir asked her, while holding her tightly in his arms.