happynewyear
I let a charming Israeli man talk me into a $30 box of nail and skin care products. It was the best performance I've ever seen. I had to give it to him. My nails are shiny and my hands smell like kiwi.
I saw Harry Potter's penis.
I had a dream that an elephant asked me to have his baby, while a bunch of lesbians standing in line for something pointed and whispered.
I don't remember how I got here. There was a lot of wine. And then I was just here. And I believe the only solution is more wine.
I've eaten one bagel and two pieces of pizza since I've been back in Norfolk. All three tasted like cardboard. Warm-ish, melty-ish, toasty-ish cardboard. Thanks for ruining everything, new york. Also, what you been up to the past few days? I miss you. Call me.
I read not nearly one hundred pages of One Hundred Years of Solitude, while an old man watched me drink hazelnut coffee and eat three quarters of a strawberry off of my strawberries with marscapone and honey on a pecan cranberry roll. I wasn't hungry.
I'm pretty sure I just did my taxes, like a few months ago. Wtf?
There was a girl in the rainy parking lot today who was yelling matter-of-fact southern-valley-girl into her cell phone, "Vegetarians eat fish. As long as it's not fried."
I've had a headache for like three years, and you guys are freaking me out.
I saw Harry Potter's penis.
I had a dream that an elephant asked me to have his baby, while a bunch of lesbians standing in line for something pointed and whispered.
I don't remember how I got here. There was a lot of wine. And then I was just here. And I believe the only solution is more wine.
I've eaten one bagel and two pieces of pizza since I've been back in Norfolk. All three tasted like cardboard. Warm-ish, melty-ish, toasty-ish cardboard. Thanks for ruining everything, new york. Also, what you been up to the past few days? I miss you. Call me.
I read not nearly one hundred pages of One Hundred Years of Solitude, while an old man watched me drink hazelnut coffee and eat three quarters of a strawberry off of my strawberries with marscapone and honey on a pecan cranberry roll. I wasn't hungry.
I'm pretty sure I just did my taxes, like a few months ago. Wtf?
There was a girl in the rainy parking lot today who was yelling matter-of-fact southern-valley-girl into her cell phone, "Vegetarians eat fish. As long as it's not fried."
I've had a headache for like three years, and you guys are freaking me out.