How many years has it been?
I love to pen down my thoughts, but over the years, I no longer have time to do that.
My marriage is breaking down.
I am functioning from an empty cup and I have nothing else to give. I have halluncinations at night and I am so scared.
I did all I can to give him every available pocket of time to rest/nap. He naps twice and sleeps so late. It is a bad cycle but I have no say. If he could sleep earlier, he could allow me a small pocket of time to rest. I am going bonkers. Why must there be so many things in my head?
He said he deserve those time away from me because I cause him much stress. Why, I would ask him to rest when he said he is tired, but when I am, he'd never offer to let me rest? Now I know, he deserves it. But I don't. Because he doesn't want to be a slave to the kid but when I have high expectations, I am on my own.
Even with a new job and promises from him that he will clean up the house, he now says he has never asked me to do anything. But no one is cleaning up the house?
I suck.
But I have raised a wonderful child. Bean hugged me and said she will be here for me. I broke down.
I don't want to cry. And I am not going to allow any tears after today. So what if today is ny birthday, my birthday means nothing to him. I am always left crying.
I cannot breakdown. I want my life to see bean and bun grow.
My marriage is breaking down.
I am functioning from an empty cup and I have nothing else to give. I have halluncinations at night and I am so scared.
I did all I can to give him every available pocket of time to rest/nap. He naps twice and sleeps so late. It is a bad cycle but I have no say. If he could sleep earlier, he could allow me a small pocket of time to rest. I am going bonkers. Why must there be so many things in my head?
He said he deserve those time away from me because I cause him much stress. Why, I would ask him to rest when he said he is tired, but when I am, he'd never offer to let me rest? Now I know, he deserves it. But I don't. Because he doesn't want to be a slave to the kid but when I have high expectations, I am on my own.
Even with a new job and promises from him that he will clean up the house, he now says he has never asked me to do anything. But no one is cleaning up the house?
I suck.
But I have raised a wonderful child. Bean hugged me and said she will be here for me. I broke down.
I don't want to cry. And I am not going to allow any tears after today. So what if today is ny birthday, my birthday means nothing to him. I am always left crying.
I cannot breakdown. I want my life to see bean and bun grow.