act. play music. eat. die. these are my objectives in life.

[dies_irae_]

so myyyy day not so interesting.

ACT. used some very funny language in my essay. i liked it. i went off on a rant about how if you give a mouse a cookiehesgoing to wantaglassofmilkandifyougivehimaglassofmilkandsoonandsoon.

then went to band practice in whitefish bay, got really fuckin lost. was a half an hour late.

saw a meybach.

it was so crazy

i didnt think they actually existed.

i almost shat myself.

so then i came back from whitefish bay and im thinking: wtf am i going to do with the rest of the day.

maybe tacos with nelson. maybe smash with pan and jeung.
maybe writing some kind of letter to cecily.
maybe going to see/meet the german exchange students with alex.
all sound moderately appealing but not really.

and theyre all on hold. so im doing livejournal instead. isnt that awesome.
and listening to some awesome music courtesty of mr richards.
its catering to my mood.

wow. i m l o s i n g t r a c k o f ev er y thi n g tha ts hap p en ing in or de r

its going to be so weird without cecily.

this must be why most creative artists are single
if they have someone to talk to, they dont bother writing their thoughts down, because they all just form a verbal stream, instead of another form of release, like a song or a poem, or a sculpture or a doodle or a mona lisa. or may the case be, something stupid like a blog. or binge eating or heavy drug use. i feel like im nothing without love. but some people still have love, but they cant release it.
hypothesis:
does creative release of neglected love have an adaptive value? if the one we love isnt there, or isnt loving us back,

aaaand cecliy just called my cell.

and you have no idea how happy i am.

so bizarre