(no subject)
i keep thinking about the comment ang left me.."you're allowed to cry, you're allowed to hate him & miss him & love him at the same time."...for some reason that REALLY helps along the way. everyone else just says the usual "your too good for him, just move on and get someone better" but what she said makes me realize that she knows its not as easy as that, that theres gonna be days where i feel suckered back into him. and when i do get into those times, its just good to know that someone said its ok...so thank you ang. im sure it was just a few quick lines that you typed up, but that helps me more than you know.
i just think i finally decided that im gonna go on with my life. im leaving in a few weeks, so why pressure the issue? he can come to me if he wants anything to do with me. maybe if i come home in 2 years and hes all fixed up, and were MEANT to be together...then it'll happen. im just not gonna force it. im young, and have so much ahead of me, and im going to be meeting a bunch of new people over the next few years.
i went in to to teach the emt class last night..i wound up being a victim instead which was fine by me. i had the funnest time ever. thats a great group of people there. the one kid matt is soooooo cute. i dont wanna say hes shy, but hes not as foward as the other guys..he doesnt make the jokes, he dies of laughter from them. after class some of us just hung out in the parking lot screwing around. good times good times. then after everyone left chad and i had an hour and a half talk about relationships..and ems. it was pretty cool. hes a good guy, and is funny as hell.
took off of school today to go up to my unit to do paperwork and get some of my gear.
my plans for tonight? probably work out. yoo the other day i ran my first mile in 6:24..and when i was done the second it was 14 something..to max my pt run i only have to do it in 15:36, and to pass i have till like 18 or 19 minutes..i dont think ive ever ran that fast in my life. the only time i maxed my run was at the end of basic for the big pt test. ive always come close...but damn i cant believe i ran that fast! i cant run distances at a normal pace, ive never been the fast one. but im gonna keep working at it. theres always room for improvement
time to go
i just think i finally decided that im gonna go on with my life. im leaving in a few weeks, so why pressure the issue? he can come to me if he wants anything to do with me. maybe if i come home in 2 years and hes all fixed up, and were MEANT to be together...then it'll happen. im just not gonna force it. im young, and have so much ahead of me, and im going to be meeting a bunch of new people over the next few years.
i went in to to teach the emt class last night..i wound up being a victim instead which was fine by me. i had the funnest time ever. thats a great group of people there. the one kid matt is soooooo cute. i dont wanna say hes shy, but hes not as foward as the other guys..he doesnt make the jokes, he dies of laughter from them. after class some of us just hung out in the parking lot screwing around. good times good times. then after everyone left chad and i had an hour and a half talk about relationships..and ems. it was pretty cool. hes a good guy, and is funny as hell.
took off of school today to go up to my unit to do paperwork and get some of my gear.
my plans for tonight? probably work out. yoo the other day i ran my first mile in 6:24..and when i was done the second it was 14 something..to max my pt run i only have to do it in 15:36, and to pass i have till like 18 or 19 minutes..i dont think ive ever ran that fast in my life. the only time i maxed my run was at the end of basic for the big pt test. ive always come close...but damn i cant believe i ran that fast! i cant run distances at a normal pace, ive never been the fast one. but im gonna keep working at it. theres always room for improvement
time to go